Can't You Stay Longer
by 11xy15
Summary: She wasn't theirs... But losing her is losing their relationship and life as worst.
1. Chapter 1

Hi guys, I'm not new at , same goes being a fanfic writer but this is my first to contribute for . So hope you like it. :)

BTW, I do not own [H]ouse and it's characters so I hope no offense has been put out from this fic. Hope you'll enjoy this!

Pairing: House and Cuddy

Rated: M

Genre: General

* * *

DING.

"Finally," he muttered to himself the moment the elevator sounded and cracked open. Elevator rides wasn't that supposed to be that long, but tonight, riding one seemed to be eternity.

His leg was in big throbbing state but he cared less about it. As a doctor, he knew he wasn't in good shape to walk, not even to stand but nothing beats his wants. Ignoring the migraine that was setting in his brain, he continued to look around the ward where the elevator took him. He was sure this was the floor he needed to be, he just doesn't know which room he needed to be in.

"House!" a familiar voice pulled him from his thoughts of negativity that was playing in his battered mind. His eyes landed on Wilson the moment he turned his head to his right. His friend of all times, his friend of all trades was there, also hoping to be ready to whatever fate will be cast upon their friend.

As the great diagnostician stood in front of him, Wilson finally saw the bruises and cuts his friend got from the stupidity and barbaric events that took place earlier that night. "Oh god House, what the –" he asked with both hands extended in front of him to calm him down a bit but he suddenly felt his own muscles loosening up when his eyes traced the bloodline flowing from the open wounds of his friend to the shaking hands beside him.

"Where's Cuddy?" was all House could come up with, eyes not even making contact with Wilson's brown ones as it continues to probe every room his vision could reach.

"We'll take you to her but first ----"

"Where the hell is Cuddy?!" he repeated with two or three tone higher than the first one.

Just when Wilson was about to say something, Nurse Jeff caught House's eyes the moment he appeared from the western wing of the ward. He wanted to read the face of the newly employed nurse, but he couldn't. Every second he wanted to conclude a certain emotion was trying to surface on the nurse's face, another one would pop out and the cycle repeats itself until Wilson walked over to the guy while he was left standing where he was, dreading the worst.

He saw the man in scrub suit leaned towards his friend's ear but he failed to hear the words being whispered but there's no need to solve this gesture like his cases because he found the answer when Wilson gave out a sigh and look at him the same way the night he lost Amber.

*********

This wasn't the first time Cuddy wanted to be alone.

Technically, she was always one since she stepped out from med school. She was able to make it to her first job, beat men in her field and became dean of one of the finest hospitals in the country all alone until the person, owning the body before her, came to her life. Since day one, it has always been butterflies and rainbows between them; too bad there'll be none of that for today and forever there won't be.

The room was as dim as her grey eyes and as silent as her cries and the tiny slit of light when the sliding door opened was something the room, if it were human, would be thankful for.

"I'll be just keeping the tubes, I'll be out 10 minutes tops," Nurse Jeff said the moment his blue ones met House's. The doctor nodded before he turned his attention to the woman seated just a few steps away from the bed.

Cuts and bloods were finally cleaned away but he will never admit that his heart sank when he saw her that way. She didn't bother removing her eyes from the being in front of her to look at him, but from where he was standing, he could see her eyes were cleared from tears but were puffy, nose looked as if she has a cold and though her hair was still on her head, it wasn't the same combed and neatly shaped but rather a messy and disarranged one. Both shoulders were also occasionally lifted when she give out a sniff but would immediately fall back to its deepest point forming like a shrug as hands intertwined with each other in between her knees.

House took a deep breathe before walking to sit beside her. For each move, he expected to be kicked out, be slapped, be yelled but there was none. He joined her eyes and looked at the lifeless body before them and couldn't even come up with a simple reason why she would still be here. In normal cases, no one wanted to, no one needed to be but she was.

"No. Don't put the blanket on top of her. It'll make her look like dead," her voice was so soft that Jeff felt lucky enough to hear what his boss uttered. Confused by what Cuddy said, House looked at her before laying his eyes on the nurse who was about to pull up the blanket over the body's head.

"Dr. Cu ---" Jeff was about to explain but was held back when House politely ordered him to follow the woman's order. If this was any other ordinary day, if this was any ordinary patient and family, he would have put his best jokes and insult about the order that was requested but tonight, there'll be none of it.

"She isn't dead," Cuddy said in a throaty voice, when Jeff finally left the room, leaving House and her alone but her eyes, not leaving the corpse for a second.

"Cuddy..." he said, wanting her to know that he felt the same lost she's having but he sucks at this. This wasn't his field but he's willing to put his guards down to try and reach out. He gave out another sigh the moment he turned his head to look at her, she wasn't crying but tears were streaming down her cheeks. The usual glow was also no where to be seen in her eyes that are now filled with nothing but grief.

After a few minutes of brief pause, there's nothing more he could say but there's something he knows he'll do; he pulled her closer to him so that her right side touch his left. Nothing change though, her cheeks still streamed on by tears and her eyes still locked on the sight before them and the body on the bed was still dead.

****************

Two hours later, House finally went out from the room after getting a page from Wilson who he met up with near the Nurse's Station.

"Cameron and your team are looking for you," the oncologist said, a tone of annoyance sounded with his words.

"Unless they're going to play god and bring back the life that's dead in there, I don't need them," House said gesturing to the room behind him.

"For heavensake House, get your ass down there and have yourself checked out."

"I'm fine, I took enough Vicodin to poke me up for the next three hours," the gruff doctor said, "Cuddy on the other hand…"

"I know… You wanted to be here and play superman for her but you're no help in your condition like that." Just like in few occasion, House knew Wilson's right when he looked down at himself. Blood may be cleaned away while other dried on his shirt and some cuts may already be stitched but he needed to pull himself to a stop as well before going on to a next level he knew that was bound to happen in a day or so.

"She wanted to be in the room when they perform the autopsy," House informed his friend.

"Wha --- Seriously?" Wilson asked in obvious disagreement but shook his head than put it into words.

"What sucks is that people are willing to kiss her ass no matter how stupid her idea was. She's the dean, their choice is either to follow her wishes or turn into a sorry pumpkin and get fired. Being around the autopsy procedure will just land Cuddy to Mayfield."

"I know. Don't worry, take a rest yourself. I'll take it from here."

"And after?"

Wilson stopped and thought for awhile before saying, "Spend time with Cuddy while I note down all the things needed for Rachel's wake and funeral."

If one would dare to ask, House would never want to label it as Rachel's.

It wasn't her body Cuddy was crying over, House urge his thoughts but no matter what he does, reality finds him and there these words one by one sink in… Rachel Cuddy's dead.

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Thanks for reading! Feel free to type in your review about this? BTW, should I continue??


	2. Chapter 2

**Hi! Thanks for all the reviews that you've given and for adding my (this) story in your story alert. That meant so much to me and gave me some a lot of will of keep writing. :)**

**I also would like to thank Nurse Jeff (really, Nurse Jeff of House MD) for the comment he gave about the first chapter and I'm glad he's willing to read along with us as well.**

**Anyway, hope you'll enjoy this chapter as much as I did.**

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Anyone who knew and saw what Wilson did for the last 24 hours would definitely agree that it wasn't _"just a job." _The man had been going up and down town to have things in line for Rachel's wake and funeral and the only break he had was when he sat down on his car seat to drive.

Nevertheless, the wonder boy oncologist still urged himself to go back to the hospital and come all the way up to the fourth floor to see his friend who he was expecting to be sleeping as what he ordered the night before.

"Why am I even surprised?" he said, throwing his hands in the air, when he saw his friend standing, back facing him, just a few steps away from the desk. He knew his friend would be as stubborn as what he is but he didn't expect that in his present condition, he would be able to keep an upright position for like 30 minutes.

"Weather sucks," House uttered but didn't bother to face the man who just came in.

The silence that followed grabbed Wilson an opportunity to notice, that even that day's afternoon was indeed weeping with them. The sky wasn't blue and gleeful but was painted with dark clouds and was threatening rainfall. It seems like what they've lost, was also the weather's lost and as the sun sets before them, their happiness for having such a little angel around was also setting down.

He heard his friend gave out a sigh and the moment he laid his eyes on him, House's head was momentarily bowed down before finally turning his heels and faced the man behind him.

"Gotten any sleep yet?" he asked though he knew what answer he might be getting.

"Had two hours of it," the diagnostician answered flatly after a nod.

"Do you want to drive down with me? I'm coming ho---"

"No," House cut him off, "I'll stay here."

"Okay." Wilson knew it wasn't just 'okay' he wanted to say. A lot of snappy words were waiting to be released from the tip of his tongue but he knew this wasn't the right time to play his self-righteousness card.

"Cleaning time," a familiar voice sounded from the doorway that caught both House's and Wilson's attention. It was Nurse Jeff, making his way further in the office, holding a first aid kit at hand.

"If you're here, who's with Cuddy?" the oncologist asked as he looked at the nurse who was now standing beside the desk waiting for House to roll up his sleeves.

"Oh she's with Cameron," Jeff replied, "apparently I didn't apply to be Dr. Cuddy's sitter; although I don't mind at all."

"Fair enough," Wilson said as he walked closer to the desk this time.

"Had she been eating?" House finally asked as his wound was being carefully swabbed.

"Compared to almost nothing for the last twelve hours, I say a pack of biscuits was an improvement," Jeff truthfully answered, "and crying seemed to be the new perk in her dear life."

"You sounded like you'd rather see her laugh in times like these," Wilson sarcastically said.

"Losing a kid is really every parent's nightmare," the nurse answered, ignoring the oncologist's comment, as he pulled another clean piece of gauze from the box, "and I'm just not that used seeing Dr. Cuddy's grey eyes that's often filled with happiness, be filled with doom instead."

With that, House's head shot right up to look into the nurse's blue eyes. "Hey," Jeff immediately defended himself, "it's not what you think, I'm just admiring your girlfriend."

As House gave a quick brow raise, the room suddenly fell silent that one could only hear the medical tape as it was being ripped out from its roll.

"Go home, take Cuddy with you," House eyed his friend who nodded in agreement but just when Wilson was about to turn around to leave, Jeff's words stopped him, "I don't think that's a good idea."

"Oh well, good for you Wilson, somebody here volunteered to do that for you," the diagnostician managed to throw a simple joke in spite of the pain he have inside.

"There. Good as new," the nurse said, admiring his work on the doctor's arm before gathering the contents of the kit again. "Well, I'll better go now."

"Wu – wait," Wilson stammered that made Jeff turned to face the duo just before he reached the doorway, "are you really going to take Cuddy home? Because ----"

"Oh that's not what I meant," Jeff's lips were almost forming a smile, threatening to crack into laughter, "Dr. Cameron told me Dr. Cuddy's sister and parents will be here before ten. Ciao." With that the nurse walked out and made his way back to the elevator, leaving the two doctors behind.

Sighing with uncertain emotion, House turned his head to his desk clock, only to read: 7:05 PM.

"Are you going to meet them?" Wilson asked.

"That's the plan."

******************

For the last 45 minutes, House had been looking through the glass door of Cuddy's office as he sat down on one of the chairs in the clinic's waiting area, far enough from his girlfriend's sight. His eyes were averting between Cuddy and Cuddy's mother who had been closely seated next to each other for almost an hour now. Both women were crying softly and it was pretty obviously that it was only the older woman who was speaking most of the time.

"Mind if I take a seat?" a female stole his attention from the room in front of him.

When he looked up, it was Julia, Cuddy's sister, staring at him with her lovely grey eyes just like the ones he often sees with Cuddy.

"I don't mind," he replied before moving his bottom to the right for the woman to seat down next to him.

He didn't get the chance to look at Julia as close as this when he first saw her. It was in a photo, actually. Right now, he could tell he could mistaken Cuddy and her sister to be twins if he have no idea who's older and who's younger. She had the same brown (close to black) hair and a lovely pair of grey eyes that obviously had been one of the reasons why her husband was captured by her own charm. But she doesn't have the guts enough to make a man head over heels over her just by the first meeting, a thing Lisa Cuddy was known for since her college days.

"How long did you planned to stay here before you come in her office?" the lady brought him back to his senses and an unexpected shivers run down his spine when their eyes happened to met halfway her sentence.

"I love these chairs," he replied, eyeing the seats that they were on, "and I think they've fallen in love with me too. That's why I'm not getting up any time soon."

Julia let out a chuckle that made House smile, a first after what happened yesterday afternoon.

Slowly, her laughter settled down and her eyes landed on her sister who was still inside her office being comforted by their mother. "Do you think she could make it?"

House turned his head and followed her stares, "she's not dead, not even dying or sick. Pretty sure the answer would be, yes she will."

"I haven't seen her this way…"

"You're not the only one who just," House cut her off when he remembered Nurse Jeff said the same thing earlier in his office. Truth be known, he was somewhat familiar with Cuddy's puffy and bloodshot red eyes. He had seen this many times but this time he knew everything's different like there's no rope of hope waiting to be snatch by her hand.

Julia looked at him and he did the same that only brought an awkward silence between them. Sighing, he looked down while twirling the base of his cane around.

"Rachel was her… everything… and losing the kid almost meant losing her life as well," he said, trying hard not to break.

"And you're losing yours too." With that, he shot his head to the side and briefly looked up at her before giving a nod in agreement.

"So you shouldn't be here alone. Deal with it with her," the woman suggested only to be answered by another minute of awkward silence.

She was about to open her mouth to speak again when the door of Cuddy's office sounded open. Both of them shoot their heads up to see Cuddy and her mother coming out of the area and in one swift motion, they stood up but it was only Julia who walked towards her family as House was left behind.

A courtesy nod happened between House and Cuddy's mother but there was none from his girlfriend, only a blank and quickly taken stare; which only frustrated him.

Sighing in a new wave of disappointment, he watched the three Cuddy-s as they completely walked out from the clinic. In spite of having a nosy persona, he honestly doesn't have any idea where they'll be heading and instead of coming after them, he decided to turn his heels and use the back door for his own exit.

******************

Halfway down the hall, where no public eye watches him, House stopped. He faced the wall and rolled his fist to form a solid ball and let the other touch the wall with open palm. Inhaling all strength, he found himself lifting the balled fist and forcefully hitting the wall with it.

As a doctor, he knew his right knuckles weren't in a pretty good shape after what he'd done. For the last time, he inhaled deeply, his head bowed forward, and when he let go of the air inside him (shivering as he did), he felt as if a lump was stuck on his throat and an unexpected single drop came from his face.

From where his head was he would say it was a non-sense drool from his slightly opened mouth.

But it wasn't.

It also wasn't a snot.

And not even a sweat.

But it was a tear that was waiting to be released since the time he learned Rachel, _his_ little girl, had passed away.

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Thanks for reading!

SOON: Flashbacks... 3

As always, reviews are appreciated. :)


	3. Chapter 3

**Whew! Finally, I thought I would never be able to come up with the third chapter but nevertheless, here it is in front of you after almost three days without an update. I know this chap isn't as great as the first two (since this was written in the middle of a cramming season of school work and hyper moment from PCA 2010), so sorry if this chap bores you.  
**

**I can't find no exact words to describe how grateful I am feeling every time you guys give a review and mark my story either as your story alert and your favorite, and for that, let me say.. THANK YOU! :) **

**BTW, starting this chapter and all the following chapters will be written in italics, meaning, they're flashbacks and will be your eye to see and know what and who was House and Cuddy and Rachel before the incident in the first chapter. I hope you like that idea as well as I do.**

**So, here it is: enjoy reading!**

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_It was nothing but an ordinary stormy night for the city of Princeton Plainsboro in the state of New Jersey. For some it would be one of those nights to savor, to sit down in front of someone whom you loved as you share a wonderful evening tea while others would prefer to lay down and cuddle close to one particular person that you knew that keeps you warm._

_But as the night crawled deeper, the more the truth surfaces and made House realized that he was taking a different route; that he won't be getting any figurative moon and stars this evening but rather a night of hatred and doom that will either make or break the most precious thing he knew he ever had._

_"I'm not doing this anymore House," Cuddy wearily said, letting out a calmer face than what she had for the last two hours but her emotional exhaustion remains in her eyes._

_He, on the other hand, sighed fearing the worst. As the words struck him, he let go of the mask of anger he had been wearing since earlier that day as questions of clarifications began forming on the tip of his tongue._

_"I already gave you your space for this but you blew off every chance you got," she added after a brief pause between them, "I have told you the truth, but again you blew it away, how am I supposed to win your faith if you rather believe your mind than me?"_

_She watched him as he looked away and glazed his bottom lip and heard him say, "Is that the reason why you're meeting up with Don again? My constant blowing of the chances you've given?"_

_Cuddy slightly shook her head and an even higher level of exhaustion began to own her eyes._

_"You're impossible," she said and begins to walk out of the kitchen that was clattered with all the things House threw a few moments ago._

_Her sudden movement caused him to lift up his head and watch her leave the room completely._

_Though with blazing desire to stop her to do something that is inevitable, House didn't bother to move a finger the moment he sat down on the bench near the piano. For the next two hours, he only had his bourbon as company as he wait to see the curtain of his love life closing before him._

_Cuddy wasn't his first girlfriend. He knew exactly what to expect when things seemed to be crumbling down exactly just the way you feared it to end but there's something in her that makes her obvious exeunt more painful than what he had before._

_Soft footsteps coming from his hallway brought him back to his senses and there, standing behind his couch, was Cuddy, gripping one bag for each hand which he blankly laid his eyes on._

_'This is it,' he told himself as he gulped, 'this is the first night of the end of my life.'_

_For the time being, neither one wanted to say something, maybe because of the fear of putting a further level of complication to their already complicated relationship._

_As he looked up to meet her stares, there was still the same exhaustion coming out of her eyes. He knew he could see love and care but he could also see both emotions slipping away. Fearing House would be able to read more than what she wanted to indirectly express, Cuddy turned her heels and walked out the door._

_As the closing door met his doorframe creating a simple thud, the great doctor concluded that it wasn't just the heaven that's roaring with pain as it being stung by lightning but there he was as worst, entering the cruel phase of being broken hearted._

_**********  
_

_By next morning, Cuddy found herself kneeling one knee outside a day care center in their neighborhood as Rachel stood in front of her wearing gleeful eyes and a million dollar smile. Wilson was behind the two Cuddy-s as he was the one who drove them up to the day care center._

_"Remember what I told you," the Dean of PPTH reminded her daughter as she fixed the little girl's dress with her bare hand, "make friends, not enemies, okay?"_

_"Uh-hmm," Rachel politely nodded her head in agreement._

_"And don't go out of the house unless I come and get you."_

_"Mommy…"_

_"Yes sweetie?" Cuddy asked sweetly, lifting her grey eyes to meet with the little girl's jolly blue ones._

_"It's Thursday…"_

_"Okay… so?"_

_"House always get me during Thursday, not you," Rachel stated innocently._

_Of course she's going to remember such scheduling. Aside from the fact of how smart the kid is, this has also been House and Cuddy's routine since the first week Rachel started going in to a day care center one year ago. She will take Mondays, Wednesday and Fridays while he takes Tuesdays and Thursdays._

_On the other hand, Cuddy might have forgotten such setting since she look up to Wilson's eyes asking for help to come up with an excuse why House can't do his part for today._

_"Ah, Rache," the oncologist started as he knelt one knee down beside Cuddy, "I don't think he would be here for today."_

_"Why is that?" the little girl asked as sadness came out with her voice._

_"He's out for… a medical conference, you know just like the ones your mom are attending with."_

_"Will he be back in time for my class program?" Now it's Wilson's turn of losing lame excuses and Cuddy knew it the moment her friend exchange glances with her._

_It surely was a bad idea to let Wilson stammer in front of a four year old who wanted to hear a truth so Cuddy decided to come in between his mumbles and said, "I'm sure he'll be around by next week."_

_Her answered brought Rachel's lips to draw a smile and a sigh of relief for both her mother and her Uncle Jim. After biding good-byes, both parties parted ways as Rachel went inside the day care center as Cuddy and Wilson went in the oncologist's car together._

_The first half of the car drive on their way to the hospital was owned by nothing but the sound of the car's engine. Tired and forced smiles were coming out of Cuddy while Wilson returns her with reassuring ones as they drove along._

_"What were you thinking when you let Rachel believe that House will be around next week?" he asked after a quick glance at her before he looked back at the road ahead of them._

_"What do you want me to do? Rat out the truth that he can't be there and watch her perform for the first time on stage?" Cuddy asked as her eyes never leave his face, "Mygod Wilson, she's four."_

_He nodded in understanding but gently spat back, "exactly the reason why you shouldn't have told her a lie."_

_He heard her let out a sigh and from the corner of his eye he could tell Cuddy looked out the window and heard nothing more from her._

_"Did you say that because you know that he'll be back in your life before Rachel got the gist of what had happened last night?" he asked after a brief silence between them that brought Cuddy's eyes back to him._

_"I don't know," she softly admitted._

_"But I do know that whatever happened last night made me realize that no matter how much I wanted to make a relationship work with House, it's just… a fantasy," she added._

_"Well, you'll never know," he said with a slight smile._

_"That was the third time this month that he accused me of sleeping with Don, how juvenile was that?" the dean said with hands gesturing in the air._

_"Maybe you've been giving him reasons to think that way?"_

_"James, for heaven sake," she said in a panicky voice._

_"He won't be thinking that way if you weren't giving him reasons to," Wilson said with another quick glance at the dean._

_"Fine…" she said with eyes averting to the road ahead of them._

_"Fine? What do you mean fine?"_

_"You're right," the woman admitted with a shook of her head._

_In surprise and confusion, Wilson pulled the car over looking at Cuddy with eyes widely opened._

_"You were cheating on House? Cu ----"_

_In one swift motion, Cuddy shot her face towards him, more surprise than he was._

_"That's not what I meant," she said and added, "Don and I only went out twice but both are with his knowledge and was for business purposes."_

_"Business purposes?" he asked with one eyebrow cocked._

_Cuddy rolled her eyes and clarified, "Julia got fired from her job and obviously needed a new one. Don and I happened to met at a supermarket and I unintentionally mention about my sister's need. Being a gentleman as he is, he offered a position for her, through me, and we agreed to meet up again."_

_Wilson nodded in understanding, "so that's the first meeting?" Cuddy nodded. "And the second one was when you met up again?"_

_"Exactly."_

_The oncologist couldn't help but to leave out a sigh maybe out of relief or out of dismay of how his best friends made a big deal out of something so little. Looking back at the road, Wilson started the engine and drove all the way again._

_**********  
_

_They arrived at the hospital's parking lot one hour after they left Rachel's day care center and as soon as the car went in to its full stop and deafening silence, Cuddy lifted her hand and placed it on her star oncologist's arm._

_"Thank you for taking Rachel with you last night," she said the moment Wilson's eyes presented a thousand questions before her, "I couldn't imagine how things will work out if ever she was there."_

_"It's the least thing I could do," he said after a nod, "don't worry about it."_

_Smiles were exchanged before they let themselves go out of their respective seat belts and made their way to the hospital's front door._

_"Finders keepers," House's voice sounded from Wilson's behind as he signed the hospital's log book but was stopped in midway when his best friend snatched the pen he was using._

_"There's probably a reason why they evolve the word, 'excuse me' and 'please'," the oncologist reminded him as he turned his head to look at House who was now standing beside him signing his name as well._

_"Well if you excuse me, I have a lunch meeting with the board so I better get going," Cuddy said getting Wilson's attention and a side glance from her former lover._

_Luckily, the moment he turned his head towards House again, it was just in time for Wilson to see that his friend's head was lifted higher the moment the woman before them turned and walked away._

_Getting a closer look at House for the second time that day he asked, "What the hell are those eye bags? Did you just cry yourself to sleep?"_

_

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_**So how was it? :) Did you like the flashback?**

**Feel free to voice out by leaving a review which I will greatfully be reading.**

**So, Thanks for Reading!  
**


	4. Chapter 4

**Once again, thanks for all the reviews and savings that you guys are giving and doing. =) I hope you still find this story interesting like the first few chapters and you still enjoy the flashbacks I am giving. **

**So do add your knowledge on what happened in the past, here is the fourth chapter:**

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_"Go away," House annoyingly said as he pushed the glass door leading to his conference room where his team was waiting for him._

_Thirteen immediately stood up upon his entrance, completely oblivious to the fact that Wilson was tailing behind her boss as she hand him a new file which the gruff diagnostician took at once._

_While his eyes shifted as he reads along, Foreman, Taub and Thirteen finally acknowledge the oncologist presence either with a look, a smile and a nod which the man gratefully returned with his own._

_"Get an ANA test for Lupus. If it comes back negative, do a full blood test then we'll see what we can do from there," House ordered his team which the three agreed to do before leaving the room without a word of opposition._

_"I never thought you'll be that shallow," Wilson broke the silence that settled down between he and his friend a few minutes after the ducklings left._

_"I said," House annoyingly uttered again without leaving his eyes on the coffee he was making, "Go. Away."_

_"You were right, Cuddy's better off without you and I think she really will be," the oncologist said before turning his heels and leaving his friend alone._

_With the sting of Wilson's words beginning to sink deeper, House couldn't find the courage to lift up his head to look at his friend who was now walking towards his own office. Deep inside, he knew Wilson was right; that the love of his life will be better of without him and that he was stupid for screwing their relationship up._

_***************  
_

_To Cuddy's surprise, the day passed smoothly between them. No one dared to step in to each other's personal space by going to their offices or by running into each other's shoes in the hallway and now she's relieved to feel safe from House's presence in the safety of her own home._

_Truth be known, it's not even two days since they (or rather she) decided to call it quits between them but the silence that's eating up every corner of her house brought her nothing but a foreign feeling like she wasn't the owner of her own living space._

_The thought of having no arms pulling her close tonight wasn't much of a help either to get her into working mode that evening; and when she heard tiny footsteps coming down the hallway, she lifted her hand and immediately wiped the tears that was sure to fall if not Rachel appeared on the study's doorway._

_"Do you think House will like my dress, mommy?" the little girl innocently asked as she made her way to her mother while swaying the side of her dress which she placed on top of her tiny frame._

_Cuddy nodded and smiled in return. "Come here," she kindly ordered with arms pulling her daughter as close to her as possible only to fail to hide a sad sniff when she placed her chin on top of the little girl's head._

_"You miss House too, mommy, don't you?" once again, it was Rachel's voice that broke the silence between them, "that's why you're crying right now."_

_When the toddler pulled her head away, Cuddy's sad smile confirmed her loneliness._

_"Oh don't do that," Rachel said while wiping her mother's eye with her little thumb, "I miss him too but he said I must not cry because I'm a big girl now. It'll only be six days before he's here again, kissing you and hugging me. Big girls don't cry, right?"_

_The only thing Cuddy could do was to left out a chuckle before saying, "yes, yes baby, big girls don't cry."_

_**************  
_

_Cuddy's work load allowed her to set aside almost all the personal baggage she have inside. For the past five days, most of her time were spent in meetings and late night work even to the point of bringing papers home with her and missing dinner and playtime with Rachel, which obviously didn't pleased the little girl's part._

_Knowing how their dean works, it didn't surprise Wilson when even his own coffee talk with her was taken by her meetings so spotting her walking down the hallway one afternoon, was probably one of the great opportunity he thought he would grab at once._

_"Hey," he greeted, feeling his feet fly like a feather in the air as he speed up his walking pace._

_"Hi," she greeted back, wearing a smile the oncologist hadn't seen in days._

_"Going down, are we?" he asked as soon as they ride the elevator together in which she nodded in return._

_"So," Wilson broke the silence that was present since the door dinged close, "how are things going?"_

_Cuddy rolled her eyes and faced him as they felt the elevator slowly coming down, "seriously, you don't have to be so formal about this, James, but to answer your question, I'm fine. So is Rachel."_

_"Good," he said after facing and nodding once at her._

_The rest of the elevator ride was unexpectedly eaten up by another awkward silence between them and as their ride stopped and the door dinged open, it was Cuddy who first stepped out as Wilson was left behind with eyes as if studying her every move._

_"Cu ---," he was about to say her name when she turned her heels to face him in an instant. The moment her eyes met his, he pressed his lips together and began walking towards her before the two of them walked acrossed the lobby of PPTH's first floor._

_"Haven't heard anything from both you and House for the past five days I admit," Wilson said as soon as he heard the door close behind him when they entered her office a few seconds later._

_"Because there's nothing to talk about," Cuddy replied in her best matter-of-fact tone of voice._

_"Have you guys talked with each other?"_

_"I know he have another CIPA patient but in regards with him sleeping with hookers, staying until one in the morning in pubs and reasons why he's coming in late, I don't think that's what administrators should still care about."_

_"Yah," Wilson nodded in sarcastic manner, "clearly you don't have any idea what House is up to nowadays."_

_In return, Cuddy rolled her eyes and replied, "I happened to run into Dr. Hadley this morning and she stated her complain about her boss."_

_"Who apparently is one of your employees as well," he continued and added after a pause, "Cuddy, this break up isn't doing him any good and I say, neither is to you."_

_The next thing he heard was the thud of the falling piled files on the desk before hearing his friend's voice again, "Don't this Wilson, please, not now."_

_"You came up with another excuse for Rachel then?" the oncologist asked again after a brief pause between them when Cuddy looked away from his knowing eyes._

_"No…" she confessed._

_"So you're planning to tell her when?" he asked, closing the distance between them by staying just a few millimeters away from the desk that separates them._

_"I don't want to tell her anything…" Cuddy said with voice almost breaking. He could see the sadness once again forming in her eyes and though he's in silent pain to see her that way, he knew this is just a part of the new world his friend decided to take._

_"You can't just keep lying to her, Cuddy and what will be your excuse the next time the kid asked where the hell is House?"_

_"House isn't her damn father," she gently spat back with her eyes finally meeting his gaze._

_"That isn't the way the things are moving right now," and he added after another pause, "I know this is hard for you but if you love Rachel you'll be cutting this crap out once and for all. I might sound harsh now but believe me, it'll be harder to lose Rachel's trust the moment she learn all these lies one day."_

_Cuddy sighed and gulped. "So you're saying, I must…"_

_"I say, go straight and tell your kid but at least be mature enough to face House…"_

_"To face who?!" she cried out, cutting Wilson off._

_"Face House. You'll be spoiling her night anyway, at least leave her something great, something she'll feel good about in spite of all the bad things that's happening like letting one special person watch her on her big day."_

_"Special person? When the hell did I not count on that list?" Cuddy asked with one brow raised._

_"Rachel looked up at House as if he's her dad. Let him act like one for the last time," Wilson answered with a smug grin on his face before turning back and leaving the dean's office and Cuddy alone to ponder on the choices he just laid for her._

_

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_**So what do you think? What improvements or demolition should I make and cut off?**

**Any reviews will be accepted as well.**

**As always, thanks for reading!  
**


	5. Chapter 5

**Finally, another update! I hope you're still into this story as much as I am. Any reviews are welcome as always. Hope you like this chapter!**

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**_Her office was owned by silence as Cuddy signed the form Thirteen handed her earlier that morning. Only the sound between the pen and the paper meeting each could only be heard as the young doctor waits for the paper to be filled in._

_"Here," the dean offered the signed paper back, "come by and give updates as soon as Mr. Harrington's brain biopsy is done."_

_Thirteen nodded before turning her heels and began walking out the door. As she passed by the couch, House, who had been seated there since he and his subordinate walked in, stood up as well and began walking with her without meeting his boss's glare._

_"House." Cuddy called out that made the man before her stopped in midway before spinning around to face her. Instinctively, Thirteen did the same._

_The moment his cold blue ones met her eyes, the dean gulped hoping the lump of nervousness would come down as well but she knew it's still there feeling her heart rate tone up its speed by one or two ratings and the presence of somebody who's out of their personal matters didn't help her heart rate to calm down._

_House turned his head only to be faced by Thirteen's anxious one. After receiving a nod of confirmation to leave, the young doc spun around and closed the door behind her before leaving the clinic and into the elevators._

_"Six days," he finally said after removing his eyes from the dean and leading it on the couch beside him. "Damn it, I knew I was hitting on the sixth but I chose fourth instead, knowing you'll fold before Friday. Now I don't get the chance to get the three grand my team polled on."_

_"What are you doing tomorrow afternoon?" Cuddy asked trying to maintain a professional tone._

_Instantly, House head shot up towards her. At the back of his head, he knew he was expecting her to say some more, begging him to come back, to admit that her life is starting to suck up without him but there was none only silence._

_"I…" she stammered and straightened before adding, "Rachel's school program is at three o'clock tomorrow…"_

_"She wanted you to be there." She finished trying to hold her gaze on House, who was stunned by her request._

_Her statement seemed to hold his tongue that he couldn't say anything he wanted to say. He knew arrogant and sarcastic remarks are seating on the tip of his tongue, ready to be delivered any moment but for some reason, the slightly opened mouth he was wearing, was also the same mouth that he kept shut a few minutes later._

_"No." His voice and the answer seemed to sound foreign even to his own ears and in an instant, he knew his answer didn't pleased Cuddy whose facial expression was suddenly turned from anxious to disbelief._

_"I am asking you as kindly as I could ----"_

_"Then you shouldn't have ASKED me. You should have ORDERED me if you want me to be there in that damn program."_

_In one swift motion, Cuddy's palms met heavily the mahogany's hard surface that even the thud echoed through the four walls of her office. She rose from her seat with eyes threatened to be conquered by maternal love's fire._

_"This isn't about me, House. This is about Rachel, wanting you to be there, at least for that day," she said in her best moderate voice as not to attract viewers from the other side of the glass door._

_"Judging by your statement," he said as he began to walk towards her desk, "I say, you haven't told the rugrat about our break up."_

_Cuddy sighed and straightened once again. "Not anytime soon, I admit, and Rachel is not a rugrat."_

_"Then you're an idiot," he spat back which she openly took. She could feel her inner self shouting at her to spit him something harder but she held herself when she realized how right he is._

_"One afternoon won't kill you," she said after a few minutes of silence between them, "You promised her that you'll be there."_

_"Past tense, Cuddy. That was before and now, things changed. A lot have changed actually for the last six days," House replied before turning his heels and began walking to the door for the second time that morning._

_"This is stupid, I am asking you a favor for Rachel not for me!" she cried out that made him spun around again._

_"Yelling at me won't change my mind," he flatly answered, "I'm really not coming."_

_Silence but both eyes were locked with the other._

_"I'm just making it easier for the kid," House continued with voice Cuddy could barely hear and with that, he let his back face her before reaching for the knob and walking out of her office._

_***************_

_Cuddy's office might be as silent as usual but right now, her mind isn't. A lot of debating thoughts about whether to go after House and beg this time or just stay in her office are running in her neurons before she was snapped back to reality when she felt Wilson's head peeping in at the door._

_"Hey," the oncologist greeted but didn't bother to step in further._

_The moment she shot her head up, she managed to fake a smile that her friend immediately noted._

_"What did House do this time?" he asked after giving a sigh knowing exactly who caused the traces of tears in her lovely grey eyes._

_***************_

_"Why the hell did you do that to Cuddy?" Wilson asked without missing a beat as soon as his feet landed in the diagnostician's office half an hour later._

_"So telling the truth about me not going to a program where annoying midgets are running around is suddenly wrong?" House asked after taking a quick swig of his afternoon coffee._

_"You could have been kinder," his friend immediately fired back. "What Cuddy did wasn't for her, she's gulping her pride for Rachel's sake."_

_"I know, that's what she said to me too, but you being her spokesman this time won't change my mind."_

_Wilson knew his friend is adamant on his decision but he also wanted Rachel to be happy at least for that day especially that he knew that after that, Cuddy planned to tell the kid about the surrounding reality between her mother's relationship with the man she thought would stay forever._

_"I am not here to change your mind, that's not my business," he calmly said with both hands securely inside his side pockets, "I just…" he sighed._

_"I just feel sorry for the four year old to whom you promised that you'll be there," he finished. "You know how special this program is for Rache, so don't pretend you don't know. It's her first stage play and she fought with her best to get the lead role and now that the show's up, she wanted you to be the one of the few people who'll see her first performance."_

_"Did Cuddy tell you that I told her that things are different now?" House annoyingly asked._

_"Fine," Wilson answered with hands flying out in mid air, "go curse and hate Cuddy for the broken heart she gave to you but hell, put Rachel out of this. After all, it's not Cuddy who's on stage tomorrow."_

_"And what? Watch her and play father?"_

_"Nobody said you'll play that role, House!" the oncologist once again burst. His friend's stubbornness is getting in his nerves that even his soul feel sorry for himself for being there for urging a man to do something he knew that man wouldn't probably do._

_"I know this isn't easy for you, but this is simple," Wilson said before facing the glass door behind him but just when he was about to leave, he spun around again and said, "don't go and search for me tomorrow either for consult or lunch money. I won't be here. I'll be with Cuddy to help her out to make Rachel feel at least okay."_

_House nodded in understanding as soon as he heard the sound of the closing door. He may have understood what his friend said but not even him could understand why his heart and mind seemed to be shaken and that all his plans for tomorrow seemed to be uncertain of the moment._

_***************  
_

_Rachel's day care center's mini theater was jam packed with excited yet nervous parents and kids the next day. Some even bothered to tag along more relatives but as for the young Cuddy, all she had was her mother and her Uncle Jim._

_When she popped out the question of where House is, her mother quickly came up with an excuse that she bought without question. The time is running and Rachel knew House is doing the same and for Cuddy's luck, just when her little one asked another, the teacher came up and nicely lead the kid to the backstage._

_Then the show started. The first part began as well and ended in less than two hours but there was no House beside Cuddy, only Wilson._

_The oncologist saw the disappointment his friend was wearing when the third part of the program played in front of their eyes. Gently, he grabbed Cuddy's hand and whispered the moment her grey eyes landed on his brown ones, "We can do this alone."_

_"Yah, that's what I'm hoping," she replied with a forced smile._

_The fourth play ended and now the great finale everyone was waiting for, which Cuddy and Wilson waited the most, began to roll on stage. Rachel went out from the backstage wearing her best Little Red Riding Hood costume with a basket full of flowers at hand._

_She began to deliver her lines as she acted her role that was obviously the reason for Cuddy's tears of joy and her Uncle Jim's smile. "She's good at this," the oncologist said._

_"I know she will be," the dean proudly said._

_"Too bad House is missing this," Wilson added._

_"Yah," Cuddy agreed silently._

_***************  
_

_The show ended five minutes after what had been expected but overall, all parents loved what had been shown and praises of Rachel's finale performance was applauded by the whole crowd. As the four year old's mother, Cuddy was approached with a lot of faces she just saw that day and all of them give her words of admiration about her daughter as well which she return with her own words of gratitude._

_"Well, that was a bunch of words out there," Wilson said as he and the proud mother began to leave the crown and made their way to the backstage to meet their star._

_"I couldn't be more proud than what I am right now, James," Cuddy replied with a smile._

_"I'm sure there'll be more so prepared for that," he replied as he opened the door for his friend who chuckled at his comment but deep inside, agreeing to his idea._

_Opening the door, their eyes fell on a number of parents proudly meeting their kids. Just like them, Cuddy wanted to find her Rachel and give her a proud hug and kiss as well but she ended up looking around to find her until she and Wilson heard the four year old's voice sounding from a corner._

_"I sang the song well, didn't I?" Rachel asked with a giggle but both adults couldn't find exactly where she is._

_They knew there was an answer since her giggles turned into laughs and as soon as the messy pathway was cleared up by leaving parents, there they saw Rachel seated on a table top with a red sucker at hand talking with someone they suspected was her teacher._

_For some reason, Rachel's eyes darted from the person in front of her to the beings that were standing a few steps away from them. "Mommy!" she cried out as she jump from the table top._

_"Hey," Cuddy greeted before bending her knees down to pull her young star for a hug._

_"I knew he'll be here!" Rachel proudly stated as the man before them turn to face them that cause both Cuddy's and Wilson's jaw to drop. "See? I love you mommy," the kid sweetly said._

_"I… I love you too sweetie," Cuddy said as she pulled Rachel for a hug so her daughter won't see the uncertain stares she was giving to the man._

_Wilson, on the other hand, was wearing a smile inside but let out a sigh outside, "House…"_

_

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_**I hope you like what happen... and**

**Thanks for reading!  
**


	6. Chapter 6

**Guys, another update. =) Hope you still like where this is heading. The future chapters are already planned and writing is all they need to keep you posted. I'll update you as soon as I can, swear! Happy Reading!**

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**_The ride back to Cuddy's house was becoming awkward as the drive gets longer and Wilson, leaving the car even for awhile to buy some take outs for them to share for dinner, only made the atmosphere inside the sedan even more awkward than when the oncologist was in the car. Luckily, the little girl failed to notice the uneasiness that was steaming out from the great diagnostician and from her mother. The two adults did exchanged casual smiles and greetings but there was nothing beyond fake small talks about work._

_Luckily, they arrived at their destination thirty minutes after they left Rachel's favorite diner. The take out meal was served after another thirty as soon as the four year appeared on the hallway wearing a new pair of clothes._

_"Oh, we run out of stocks this morning. Do you want us to stop and buy at Whole Foods on the way back home?" Wilson eyed House as he ask, beating the sound only their spoons and forks were making._

_Both House's and Cuddy's head shot up to look at him and Rachel following close after them. As the man before him shot him a look he knew was a warning, a feminine kick was received by the oncologist's left foot._

_"What?" he asked after scrunching his face because of the sudden pain before the reality dawned on him. "Oh," he added and mumbled a 'sorry' short after._

_"You're not sleeping here?" Rachel asked with all the innocence in the world looking straight from her seat to the man who was forced to sit beside her mother._

_House looked back at her for a second or so before turning his head to get a quick glance from Cuddy and get some from Wilson as well on the way back to look at the little girl again._

_"Ahm… I… Don't think so," he said almost choking with his words and it hit Rachel like bumping with full impact against a brick wall._

_"Oh… Why is that?" The three adults heard her say but they listened more to the disappointment the words were yelling._

_"Ahm… Your mom and I are…." he started only to be cut off by Cuddy in midway._

_"Will be attending a very early board meeting tomorrow, sweetie," the dean interjected._

_"Couldn't you do that even if you sleep here?"_

_"House doesn't have working clothes with him, Rache," Wilson tried to make it up to the former lovers by being the one who'll come up with a fake excuse. When the little girl looked back at him he added, "All his coat and ties are at home."_

_"Can't you get it for him?" A suppressed laugh left House's closed mouth that caused Cuddy to secretly pinch his right rib that made him stop._

_"He's too tired from his flight baby," the dean said. "I don't want you driving at midnight in your sleepless state like this, right sweetie?" she added stressing the final word as she eyed the diagnostician who was still threatening to fill the room with his laugh._

_"But I want you to sleep here tonight," Rachel wearily said that made Cuddy stood up before making her way just beside the little girl's chair._

_"Hey," she said, "why don't you get yourself ready for bed? We'll talk about this tomorrow, okay?"_

_"Can't I stay here with House longer? He's not sleeping here for tonight, after all," the four year old pleaded only to be answered by a deafening silence from the three adults._

_"Come here," House brought the group to senses as he extended his arms apart. As soon as the girl reached his personal space, he pulled her to a tight hug that was returned with the same amount of affection that almost melted both Cuddy's and Wilson's heart._

_"I love you, House," Rachel unconditionally said and was returned with a sigh._

_"I know…"_

_Wilson looked up from the chart he was signing only to find House in the same position as what he had seen twenty minutes ago. The diagnostician was unusually silent since he got in as he sat on the couch on the left side of his friend's office next day afternoon._

_"Stop it," the oncologist said, "the thinking," he added as soon as he felt his friend's eyes finally shot towards him._

_House let out an exaggerated sigh and extended both his arms sideward and leaned deep against the couch, "You want to know what I'm thinking?"_

_"No, thanks," Wilson shot back and took another chart and began signing it just like what he did with the last 20 sheets, "and whatever it is, you are not going to do it."_

_"Of course I am," House immediately said a smug forming on his lips, "didn't you see how much the midget misses me? It wouldn't harm her if I stay with her for one night," he continued without missing a beat._

_"No, you're not concern how much Rachel missed you, you just want to get even with Cuddy," the oncologist said without bothering to look up._

_"Words can hurt you know." He paused._

_"And also actions," Wilson said before looking at his friend, "Just leave Cuddy alone and you, being in her house tonight wouldn't do any good if she planned to admit your breakup to the kid."_

_House sighed and his smug began to surface, "That would be better, wouldn't it?" as he made his way to the door and slammed it close as he leaves._

_A knock suddenly disrupt Cuddy as she was doing the dishes that evening. Fearing the thought of who it was, she washed her hands in one swift motion before making her way to the hallway where she met Rachel who was also walking to the door as well._

_"It's okay, baby, I'll get it. Just get in your room," she said and as soon as the little girl disappeared from her sight, she turned on the knob and slowly opened the door to know who the unwanted visitor was._

_And it was really unwanted. "House…"_

_"At your service, you're highness," the diagnostician greeted in his best British accent._

_"Save it. I don't need your service."_

_"Is that how you treat a visitor or you just hate every ex you have in your life?"_

_As soon as House was done with his speech, Cuddy pushed him out the doorway and smashed his back against the nearest wall possible as she leaned on him, almost smelling his breath out of his smiling lips._

_"Wow, if only I know you'll be this aggressive after a break up, I would have broken up with you months back," he said sarcastically, his smile turning into a grin, "you miss me, don't you?"_

_"Not a chance. Now ge---"_

_Cuddy was cut off when they heard the door creak wider and a curious Rachel appeared before them. Her eyes went wide and a smile began forming on her little red lips while her mother was forced to peel herself from the intruder who was obviously the reason of her daughter's beam._

_"House!" the four year old squeaked in excitement as she ran towards the person who she looked up as a best friend._

_"Hey," the diagnostician greeted and made himself of level of her by bending down as Cuddy watched his interactions with the little girl._

_"Tell me," Rachel said as soon as her arms owned the man's neck, "you're going to stay here, are you?"_

_House looked up to Cuddy but she refused to do the same, instead she made her way to the doorway and said, "Rache, just get yourself ready for bed before nine and House… clear your shoes from the soil crumbs, I just did the floor."_

_With that, she disappeared to the kitchen to continue the chores she left a few minutes ago unable to see the triumphant smile that was playing on her ex-lover's lips._

_It was pass ten in the evening when House walked out from the bathroom in Cuddy's bedroom. His eyes were set on Cuddy, who was reading what seemed to be a medical journal, as he slowly wiped his hands with a dry towel._

_Setting the towel aside, he silently sat on the chair beside the coffee table and leaned forward with elbows resting on both legs. His eyes were now on his hands in front of him as his palms rubbed the other._

_"Were you really planning to tell the kid tonight?" he finally asked with all the soberness he could get._

_Cuddy looked up at him and seeing how serious the usual joker turned out to be, she dropped the journal on the space beside her and said, "I want to. The sooner the better, I guess."_

_"Then why didn't you do it?" he asked without letting his eyes leave the hands in front of him, "is it because I'm here?" and with that, he finally looked up to meet her gaze._

_Cuddy sighed and admitted, "It… it made me realized how coward I am on everything about this."_

_"Hey," House sweetly said as he stood up and took the space beside her, "you're not."_

_"If you're saying that so I will feel good about this, you're not hitting it right." She gulped and continued, "I'm selfish and ---"_

_"Whoa, whoa, whoa, don't you add some more before you turn out to be really selfish by getting all the negative terms as if they're collectibles," House joked that made Cuddy scoffed in spite of the threatening tears that were forming in her eyes. "You're just doing the right thing, protecting her from the obvious pain she'll be getting as soon as the news hit her. That's not selfishness Cuddy," he added._

_When he saw a tiny smile forming on her lips, he could feel his inner self melting but never would he admit it out loud. Their eyes met for a few minutes more and he knew if she didn't stand up, he would have leaned and smashed his lips onto hers and would greedily take her his again._

_"I'll go and wash my face again," she uttered, completely aware of the awkward moment that ensued before leaving the bathroom door closed behind her._

_House was now lying on his back on his usual side of the bed the moment Cuddy got back. Two hours ago, the two agreed that he may sleep in tonight but both, especially Cuddy, have no certain plans for the coming days. The kid that they are handling right now is four and the last thing they need is for the kid to be depress in her crucial age as this._

_"Good night," his voice suddenly filled the room that made Cuddy turned her head to his side at once only to be meet by his wide blue ones._

_"I thought you're already asleep," she said._

_"Well apparently not. Haven't sleep here for quite awhile, guess my back felt new on this," he explained that was answered with another smile._

_"Good night House," she greeted._

_"Good night Cuddy." With that he watched her as she turned on the other side and let her back faced him before feeling his own eyes closing and feeling his brain drifting to his own sleep._

_

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_**Thanks for reading!**

**Reviews and comments are welcomed as always...  
**


	7. Chapter 7

**Knock knock. Update delivery. lols Once again, I thank you for the great reviews that you guys are giving me. They meant a lot to me! :)**

**And to pay you for the kind words you are giving, here is another update for you guys to enjoy! Happy Reading!  
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_House was woken up by the constant ringing of the analog clock beside him the next day. He groaned and stirred a little only to hear the ringing gets louder. He poked one eye open and read the time, 8:24, before noticing a folded paper, sandwiched between the mahogany night stand and the deafening monster._

_He knew he never saw it the night before so being as intrigued as he is on everything, he lifted his still limpy arm and slammed his palm on the silent button before pushing himself off the mattress and let his back touch the headboard._

_"Hmmm," he sounded as he began to read the scribbles he's too familiar with._

_'Went out to leave Rachel to day care. Wilson and I are out for jog. Your team called and is looking for you. Just help yourself out in the kitchen._

_Cuddy_

_PS: Don't forget to clear the dishes'_

_And in spite of his usual gruff morning self, as soon as he finished reading the paper, he could feel his lips curving a smile._

_***************  
_

_With jacket clung on his arm and keys in his closed palm, House looked around the room for what he had expected would be his last time. He heavily left out a sigh as he turned to face the door and began to move out. It was as if he was dragging his feet to move forward because for the first time in months, he'll be living that room of heaven with nothing but a heavy heart._

_As he walked down the hall, thoughts of how much he wanted to stay began flooding his mind. He knew even from the start that he was bond to leave this house, but never did he think how early it would be. Few months ago, this house had also been his, he would come in, sleep with the owner, play with the owner's daughter, shower here, eat here, all the basics… but not anymore._

_"I knew I kept a lot of carrots in the fridge." The voice, coming from the kitchen, made House stopped on his tracks._

_Wait, was it Cuddy? He looked at his watch and was surprised to know that it was already ten in the morning yet their dean, who was a straight 'A' bearer on being an early bird, was still in the house._

_"Are you keeping rabbits in your house? Last I saw them there were like two packs stocked in," said by another._

_The dean's laughter was cut off when House finally let his presence be known by entering the dinning room where he knew the voices are coming from._

_At the first sight of his friend, Wilson almost dropped the cup of coffee he was handling but was unfortunate enough to held back when he accidentally sprayed the contents he have in his mouth causing both House and Cuddy to flinched and moved a few steps back._

_"Wow, you're more talented than I thought. Remind me later to bring you to the nearest flower garden in Plainsboro, they could use some human water spray," the diagnostician said as he watched his friend's eyes grew bigger the second the oncologist lifted his brown ones to meet his._

_"You… you slept here?" his friend asked as the last drips of coffee began landing on his jogging shirt._

_"Does staying here for the night counts?"_

_As soon as Cuddy felt Wilson's questioning glare, she lifted her right hand and began rubbing her temple as she crossed the room and said, "I need to mop up the floor. Excuse me."_

_He wanted to pull her to a stop and ask her every question he knew these two will lie about anyway, but decided to interrogate the dean later who was determined to clean the mess he made earlier. As soon as Cuddy's shadow disappeared, he turned his head and let his eyes land on the man who was now leaning against the counter with a proud smug plastered on his face._

_"So this is your plan?" Wilson asked as he slightly moved his face sideward._

_House inhaled noisily but exhaled the other way before saying, "not really but who am I to complain a good accommodation offered by Dr. Cuddy?"_

_The moment the dean returned, with a mop at hand, the diagnostician's smug was still there that made the woman shot death glare at him to signal him to remove it or he'll end up walking out with a mop tailing behind his ass._

_"Is it true?" Wilson asked shifting his eyes from his friend to the other._

_Cuddy rolled her eyes and replied, "yes."_

_"Whoa…" Wilson said in utter shock that he failed to notice House moved and was now in front of him, handling a paper napkin._

_"Wipe that coffee off your face, you look a lot worse than a one year old eating chocolate," the diagnostician said as his friend took the napkin and did what was told._

_As soon as he finished clearing his mouth from the coffee mess, he walked straight beside Cuddy and offered his help which was immediately granted. "So you sleeping here means that Rachel took the admission lightly?" he asked without bothering to look up from the floor he was mopping on._

_Cuddy, who was then making her way to the sink, stopped in midway before turning to face the two gentlemen again only to be met by House's blank face. He knew by the way she looks, she wanted his help but being a speechless human being as he is on things like this, all he gave was quick eyebrow raise for encouragement._

_"We…," she sighed and let her fingers crossed with the other before nervously adding, "we didn't tell her."_

_As both of them expected, Wilson stopped before lifting his head up to look at the dean with all the imaginary question marks Cuddy could ever imagine. Sighing in frustration, Wilson sucked his bottom lip before giving House a quick glare as well before shifting his eyes back to the woman again._

_"I don't know what to say," he sadly admitted._

_"You think she does?" House said motioning to Cuddy as he walked passed his friend as he cross the room to make himself some coffee._

_"How long are you up to keep this secret?"_

_"It's like you're asking 'how long 'til we land' while sailing over the great pacific," Cuddy muttered that made Wilson raised one eyebrow for her to explain further._

_"I don't know," she confessed._

_"So you're just going to play this game until Rachel finds out and freak out about the truth?" Wilson asked after shaking his head once and looked away._

_The question hung in midair as silence ate up the three of them. As House turned around, all he got was Wilson's silent 'oh god' and the sight of Cuddy seated on a bar stool with her fingertips running across her temple again._

_***************  
_

_An hour later, Wilson's car was speeding up its way back to the apartment. The entire time he and House were in there was mostly spent with silent treatment. Neither one wanted to speak up as one knew the other was disappointed while the other just doesn't know what to say._

_Being Rachel's godfather, all Wilson want the former lovers to do was to come out clean and hurt the four year old much less but given the fact of Cuddy's admission of retreat, all he could do is to feel sorry for her and ready himself to be her shielding arms._

_"Have you ever wished last night was THE night?" the oncologist asked as he slouched on the couch in his friend's apartment as he waited for House to finish dressing up for work, minutes after they arrived at the place._

_The diagnostician appeared from his hallway, looking blankly as his hand tightly held his coat._

_"I wished," House said, tossing the coat aside, "but I never expected."_

_Wilson made a quick eyebrow raised in agreement as he watched his friend face the mirror for the second time since they came in._

_"Did you ever think that sleeping in last night, with her, in her house, will patch things up?" the oncologist threw once more._

_"Again, I wished but I never expected," House answered as he picked up his coat and began putting it on._

_"You know what, if you guys are both cowards to tell the kid about the break up, why don't you just be adult enough to settle your own problem? Maybe, maybe it's not that late to make it work," Wilson said with arms and hands flying in gestures._

_"Oh come on Wilson, what is this twelve grade? With the number of divorce piling up in the court, do you think there's still something as fairy tale ending?" the diagnostician replied as he fixed his shirt's collar._

_"Cuddy and I are fine. We talked last night and it seems neither of us really wanted to take another crazy shot," he added as he land a look on his friend, who was then standing up._

_Wilson breathed in deep as if gathering all air in his friend's apartment in the safety of his lungs and exhaled them all softly before saying, "Well, maybe things really work out that way. It's just too bad to know that I won't be able to hear Rachel officially calls you 'daddy' in the future."_

_House chuckled at his friend's remark as Wilson walked himself to the door. "I'll be in the car," the oncologist informed before leaving the door close as he walked out._

_Too bad he wasn't able to see the smile on his friend's lips that stayed after his brief laugh and he didn't get the chance to hear House whispered, "Yah, I was wishing for it too. Guess my expectations were too much."_

_

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_**So how the latest chapter? Tell me anything you wanted to say, I'll be happy to read and honor them.**

**And as always, thanks for reading! *hugs*  
**


	8. Chapter 8

**Update delivery! :) Thank you once again and hope you like this chapter!**

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_2:03 AM the clock beside her read._

_For the tenth time that night, Cuddy rolled herself on the other side of her bed as she forced herself to sleep. It has been two hours since she lay down only to fail to fall to a deep slumber she was looking forward all day._

_Even if she doesn't want to admit it in front of anyone, she's guessing this is what other people called guilt._

_She lying, she's cheating and she's keeping a secret not just to somebody but to her daughter. A fair reason to feel ashamed of herself when she threw another reason to her daughter why House can't sleep in. Tonight the little girl bought it like how she bought her mother's earlier excuses but she won't be buying those lies forever. Somewhere in the future, she'll notice, she'll ask, she'll know._

_And on that day, no one exactly knows how things will either fall or grow._

_***************  
_

_For the fifth time that day, House met up with his ducklings in his office as all of them felt discouraged given the fact that not even a single progress faces them on their current case. All tests came back negative every time and going home for all of them is still out of sight._

_"Aren't you going to answer that?" Taub asked as he look passed by House's body to look at the phone that has been ringing since they got in._

_"What else?" the diagnostician asked his team as he once again ignored the constant and annoying ring behind him._

_"Don't you think you should answer the phone first?" Thirteen asked after a brief pause between all of them._

_"Environmental or toxins, very good Thirteen, I like that," House deflected as he moved across the room and began writing the possible cause of their patient's condition._

_With his back facing the team, he wasn't able to see Foreman standing up and walking over to desk to answer the annoying call he thought might be just a prank caller from a bored jackass._

_"Yes, this is Dr. House's department," the neurologist confirmed to the person on the other line and added, "just give me a minute," after hearing the person's request._

_"It's for you," Foreman called out as he handled the mouthpiece of the phone, eyeing House as he did so._

_Given no choice to run away, House left out a shrug and an eye roll before taking the receiver from his employee who he was cursing at the back of his mind at the moment._

_"Greg House!" he said with a faked cheery tone, loud enough to break the other person's eardrum, "how may I help you?"_

_As the room was filled up with silence, the team watched as House's face turned from annoyed to a serious one._

_"Don't bother. I'm coming over," he flatly answered before putting the receiver back to the phone and walking over to the coat rack, picking up his jacket and helmet at once._

_"Where are you going?" Chase asked as the rest of the group scrunched their faces in curiosity._

_"Out," the diagnostician answered before completely walking through the door and riding an elevator down._

_***************  
_

_A few minutes later, House pushed one of the double doors that eventually lead him to the clinic that was packed with patients waiting for their call. He limped as fast as he could to the nurse's station and eyed the glass door of Cuddy's office. For some reason he wanted to heavily push her doors as well and scold her but was mentally stopped when he saw a visitor seated on one of the chairs across the desk._

_"It's amazing to see you here, Dr. House," Jeff commented that brought the doctor back into his senses, "here to help out I guess."_

_"Who's with Cuddy?" House asked._

_Jeff spun around to look at the dean's office as quickly as he returned the look on the grumpy doctor before him and said, "How do I know? I'm not her secretary. But I do know that the man had been in there with her for the last two hours."_

_"Two hours? Did Cuddy forget that she has a four year old waiting in a day care center?" Jeff could tell how angry House is and the way the doctor pushed the door open, he knew he's watching an accident about to happen._

_***************  
_

_At the same time House barged in the clinic and was having his simple talk with Nurse Jeff, Cuddy was seated in front of the man she met four years ago. The man wasn't the same though but she could still feel the fear that's creeping in every time the man showed up in front of her face._

_She wanted nothing but to run away. She knew this moment is inevitable but she have gone too far within that four years to just turn back and selfishly accept the man's offer._

_"Dr. Cuddy," the man said._

_She lifted her stares from her desk._

_"I am not asking for anything more than that," he added with pleading eyes._

_Cuddy gulped and fought to hold back the tears that were threatening to fall anytime soon if she wouldn't speak up. "I… I'm sorry but… I can't," she answered with a shaky tone._

_"I won't be getting something I know that's yours. I just wanted to see what's also mine."_

_"What you're asking isn't a game. You can't just show up like this and expect things to run smoothly as if counting 1,2,3," she said before standing up._

_The man did the same, "Dr. Cuddy…"_

_She stopped on her tracks on the way to her private bathroom before turning her heels to face him again._

_"I may not feel the same way as you do but I am hurting as well because…"_

_"Simon," Cuddy raised one palm in surrender as the young man stood and watched a tear rolled down her rosy cheeks, "stop. I don't need to be reminded that I am not Rachel's biological mother and that you have more right to have her than me."_

_"That's not what I meant to say…" Simon clarified._

_"Then we'll talk about it… not just now," and with that, Cuddy turned her heels again and walked straight to her bathroom as the young man quietly made his way out of her office._

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_**Any word from you guys will be greatly appreciated! :)**

**Thanks for reading!  
**


	9. Chapter 9

**Okay, first and foremost, I'm sorry if this chapter seemed to be long and a bit too detail-y. I think I'm running out of words but I do have an idea of how this story will go and one of the chapters that will help you see what happened before is right down below! Go on and happy reading (if you think it's worth being happy about. lols)!**

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He knew this wasn't the best of the ideas. Judging by the guilt plastered on Cuddy's face when she walked in that morning, he could tell the woman's determined to tell her daughter that they finally call it quits as soon as evening falls. Being here, getting the kid from day care, will just make things harder not just for Cuddy but for Rachel most especially; but he couldn't just sit back and relax after hearing the teachers' concern about the teary four year old waiting in vain in the classroom when all the rest of the class had gone home._

_House tapped both his thumbs onto the steering wheel in front of him. He had been inside the car for almost twenty minutes now and giving his doubt a final thought, he sighed and freed himself from the car._

_He quietly walked in the center and was careful enough not to make any noise as he pushed to open another door at the end of the hallway. He was greeted by banners and kiddy streamers and his eyes were filled with pastel colors in all hues and designs. The floor wasn't tiled but rubbered and most of the space was taken by tables and chairs while balls and blocks seemed to dominate one side._

_"May I help you?" a female voice sounded from behind. As he turned back, House was faced with a young woman, probably aged 20 or 21, a brunette and was endowed with a figure one would love to call her own._

_"Ah, yes," he answered as he watched the woman walked near to him, "I'm here for Rachel."_

_"Oh, you must be her father. Follow me." House wanted to protest but didn't get the chance when the teacher began walking away ahead of him and left him no choice but to follow her; clarifications could come later anyway._

_"She's been crying since her last classmate left," the teacher said as they made their way to the other side of the hall, "you must be stuck in a meeting, huh?"_

_"Actually, I'm still am," he flatly replied wanting nothing but to leave as soon as he could but this with Rachel safely within his sight, "So can we do this in a faster way because ---"_

_He was suddenly cut off when the teacher finally opened the French door that lead them to a more professional looking office and there, seated in one of those huge client chairs, was Rachel. Her head was bowed down and he knew she was playing with her hands just like what she does whenever she felt nervous and worried._

_Feeling another presence in the room, Rachel shot her head up in time to see House walking towards her. He couldn't grab certain words to describe how he felt when he finally saw the glint of happiness radiating in her eyes as soon as his blue ones met hers. He must have been engrossed on the little girl's glow because the next thing he knew was that the four year old was now clinging on him._

_"I thought you won't be here," Rachel said with sobs in between._

_"Hey," House gently greeted before bending as low as he could to be of level of the little girl, "of course we'll pick you up."_

_"You're with mommy?"_

_"No, no, she's having a meeting. Might have lost track of time," he said as he raised a thumb to wipe the tears that were falling, "come on, let's get you home."_

_Rachel nodded and immediately let go from his grasp and disappeared to another door to which House thought would lead to another classroom. As soon as they're alone, he faced the teacher who had been the only audience of his softness to the little girl._

_"I'm sorry if I mistaken you to be Rachel's father," the teacher apologized, "you're walking with a cane, I assume you're Dr. House," she added as soon as her hazel eyes landed on the stiff wood the doctor was holding._

_House's brow furrowed in surprise, "Clearly I'm the ONLY doctor running around the planet with a cane," he said with sarcasm, "Love the epithet."_

_"Oh, please, don't get it wrong," she said as she started to move closer but was in full awareness not to enter the well known diagnostician's personal space, "I'm just star struck to finally get to see you…"_

_"I'm a star now? Cool," House cut her off, obviously bored on the bee line of conversation he and the teacher was having._

_The lady flashed out a smile that he thought was probably her worst-trying-to-be-cute smile before she extended a hand and said, "by the way, I'm Ms. Terry but you can call me Terry, I mean, it's not like you're one of the kids in…"_

_'Oh, why do you even what me to care,' he could feel the flow of these words making their way from his mind to the tip of his tongue, luckily Rachel finally showed up and to House's own surprise, the little girl snatched his free hand and held onto it as tight as she could._

_"You're ready to go?" he asked, happy to land his eyes from the teacher to the four year old beside him. She nodded. "Bye," he said, lifting his eyes to meet Terry's eyes again as he took the woman's hand for a quick shake._

_"It's nice meeting you, Dr. House," she said to which the man answered with a nod._

_As House and Rachel made their way to the door, a little exchanged of good-byes came from both the little girl and her teacher but just when House step out of the open door, Terry spoke from behind that made both of them spun around, "If you want, you can take a look at Rachel's work I posted on the wall. That's where I first saw you."_

_House didn't felt the urge to look at the messy but colorful drawings posted on the nearest cork board until he saw a smug grin plastered on Terry's face. Intrigued by what she knew, he slowly limped towards the wall the teacher was referring to with Rachel being towed behind him._

_At first he was drove crazy. Almost all figures seemed to look the same but one drawing stood out. It was Rachel's. Labeled with a ribbon and number one in the middle of the circle, the drawing wasn't something extraordinary for a four year old to do but the words written below the figure of man with a cane, a little girl with a skirt and a woman wearing another almost brought him out of his senses._

_'This is mommy, me and Dr. House. He loves me and he loves mommy too! He's not my daddy but he said I am his baby. It's okay because I know one day he'll be my daddy too!' His eyes moved from left to right as he silently read the colorful scribbles on the paper before him._

_"I told Ms. Terry to take it off but she wouldn't," Rachel silently said from behind when she saw the unusual smile creeping on the man's face._

_"I agree with her, she shouldn't," House replied with a smile as he looked down to the hiding girl behind him._

_"I don't think it's just right to…"_

_"Don't worry about this. Let's just get you home," he said before glancing up and mouthed a word of thanks to Terry which was answered with another smile. He gave another look on the drawing before leading Cuddy's four year old out of the building, with a smile plastered on his usual grumpy face._

_***************  
_

_An hour later, House found himself seated on one of Cuddy's living room couches but, unlike him, Rachel chose to sit on the floor. His eyes weren't disturbed by the mess of papers and crayons that surrounded them because the sight of the little girl beside him already captured his eyes. After seeing what the kid had drawn, he wanted nothing more but to prolong his stay inside this house much longer. If luck would favor his side, he'll stay for a night and see where things go from there._

_"What time will mommy be home?" Rachel asked with much impatience House could think of._

_"I'm sure she'll be here before the clock strikes twelve," he replied only to be answered with an eye roll he could tell he'd only seen with Cuddy._

_"Mommy isn't Cinderella," she snorted back._

_"Oh sure. Your mom won't dare to leave one side of her Prada along the way."_

_"What's a Prada?"_

_"Something you shouldn't know until you've got a full time job of your own," House replied without missing a beat and just as soon as he finished his little speech, the two of them heard the door slowly cracked open._

_"It's mommy!" Rachel's eyes grew wide in excitement before making her way to the hallway and the next thing he heard was indeed Cuddy's voice._

_"No, I wasn't alone. House got me," the kid informed after a few indistinct sounds House could hear from where he was seated and that was his cue to stand up and finally meet the owner of the house._

_Just like Rachel, he felt his excitement and relief building up inside him but the idea of Cuddy's irresponsibility on her daughter earlier replaced these emotions with a wave of anger once again._

_"He didn't leave you alone here, did he?" the dean asked before finally stepping in the living room where she saw House for the first time that day._

_Her smile dropped as his face remained strict and firm and the entire household was held by nothing but silence. Rachel's eyes bounces from her mother to the doctor she adore and both were oblivious to the idea how nervous and unease the child had become._

_"Rache," Cuddy gently said, lying her eyes on her daughter, "why don't you keep your things now, okay sweetie?" Given the growing tension around her, the four year old was left with no choice but to nod in agreement._

_As soon as her eyes landed back on House, a few more serious stares were exchanged between them before the man sharply looked pass her and walked straight to the kitchen, bothering not to greet or say anything along the way._

_***************  
_

_With the idea of having her daughter finally in her room, Cuddy left out a sigh before stepping in the kitchen where she found House filling up a glass of water for himself. His back was facing her and she decided to stay on the doorway instead of further coming in, completely aware of what might ensue any moment from now._

_"House…" she shakily began as soon as she heard the empty glass hit the counter top again._

_There were no sign of recognition from him aside from a heavy sigh he left out after closing the fridge door beside him. She saw him extend both his arms sideward and held on the edge as strong as he could, almost turning his knuckles white._

_"I… I just wanted… to say thank you for…" she stammered when she realized she'll get nothing for a response._

_He heard her but he didn't want to listen. His anger was still there and he knew she knew it. Hoping it'll lessen his temper, House decided to shut his eyes for a second or so before finally turning to face Cuddy as he let go of the edges he was grasping._

_As soon as his fierce blue ones land on her, Cuddy gulped as she felt her nerves tensed up. His eyes were strictly on her but none of his body parts are moving forward or farther. Frightened, she straightened herself a bit because she knew the House before her tonight won't put up with any prank and won't take any damn for an answer._

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_**Brr, just the thought of the last line sent me chills, how about you?**

**Anyway, thanks for reading!  
**


	10. Chapter 10

**Yah, this update is a little bit late than usual but not to worry, it's right here now! :) I've been having debating thoughts for the past few days whether to end the flashbacks or just stay where I am right now and for this, I want to hear what you guys think and wanted. Are you feeling bored by the long flashback now? Tell me okay?**

**Okay here's the new chapter now, hope you'll like it! Happy reading!  
**

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Previously on 'Can't You Stay Longer'

_"House…" she shakily began as soon as she heard the empty glass hit the counter top again._

_There were no sign of recognition from him aside from a heavy sigh he left out after closing the fridge door beside him. She saw him extend both his arms sideward and held on the edge as strong as he could, almost turning his knuckles white._

_"I… I just wanted… to say thank you for…" she stammered when she realized she'll get nothing for a response._

_He heard her but he didn't want to listen. His anger was still there and he knew she knew it. Hoping it'll lessen his temper, House decided to shut his eyes for a second or so before finally turning to face Cuddy as he let go of the edges he was grasping._

_As soon as his fierce blue ones land on her, Cuddy gulped as she felt her nerves tensed up. His eyes were strictly on her but none of his body parts are moving forward or farther. Frightened, she straightened herself a bit because she knew the House before her tonight won't put up with any prank and won't take any damn for an answer._

_They stared at each other for a few minutes before House saw Cuddy glazed her bottom lip with the tip of her tongue. The tension between them was growing as seconds turned to minutes and every tick of the clock was something they couldn't get back._

_Frustrated with his lack of words, she sighed in surrender and quite pleadingly said, "If you want to yell at me, do it. Just don't stare at me like…"_

_This time he listened but he didn't let her finish though. Knowing himself too well, he knew there's a yelling megaphone inside him that wanted to scare the hell out of her but given their situation, given the idea of having a child in the house, he felt the need to hold himself back._

_But it was Cuddy who pushed the button when she snatched his arm the moment he passed by her side. He turned and was faced with her own fierce stares as her hands gripped tighter than what she's supposed to._

_"I'm twice your size. Let go," House flatly said, trying to hold his temper down as he looked straight into her eyes._

_Getting nothing in response, not even her hand yanking him off, he looked away as he wet his own lips and felt the surge of blood coming up to his head. It was not long enough though when he felt the grip loosening up and the action alone made him looked back at the woman beside him._

_The moment she looked away, House began limping back to the living room where, to his surprise, Cuddy followed._

_***************  
_

_"Why are you doing this?" she asked as she watched him pick up his jacket from the couch._

_"You seriously don't know?!" he yelled as he spun around, finally letting his temper blow but making sure things are still under his control though he let his jacket flung heavily to one side._

_"Oh my bad, why should I assume you know when I saw you stuck in your damn office when you're supposed to be picking up your kid?!" he sarcastically added as he closed the distance between them._

_"You don't even know why I'm there so shut up," she spat, matching his tone and firmness as she speaks._

_As the inevitable fight begins in the living room, Rachel's door was slowly pulled open. A few seconds later, the four year old went out, tiptoeing her way to the end of the hallway. Her mom told her not to listen to any adult argument but this fight was a first for her naked eye. Peeking her little head beside the wall's end, she began to listen._

_"This shouldn't be happening if you were responsible enough for your daughter!" House returned._

_"I am! But just so you would know, I was there to work not to flirt or waste my damn time!" Cuddy immediately said, lifting her face closer to the point that she could even feel his breathe. "If picking Rachel up was a burden for you, why didn't you just let her rot there until I come and get her?" she asked in between gritted teeth._

_He looked at her as the sound of their strong breathings owned the room until it was replaced by House's sarcastic chuckle. Cuddy watched him moved away from her, running his palm across his sweaty forehead as he did so._

_"If thanking is all you stayed here for," she began that caused him to look back at her, "then thank you; but to expect me to accept every blow of your self-righteousness…"_

_"I am not playing that card, Cuddy," he cut her off._

_"Well you have no right on anything! We already called it quits remember?! You are no longer my fucking boyfriend, House!" she yelled back._

_The tension was growing stronger and both were still oblivious to the crying being behind the wall behind them. Rachel's tears began falling as soon as House and Cuddy went face to face with each other. Indeed the four year old wasn't ready and she knew it herself as the flood gates of her eyes she urged to stop, didn't._

_"What if DYFS call it quits between you and Rachel, you would just let her easily go then?" the diagnostician asked._

_'DYFS?' Rachel silently thought as she silently sniffed. She have heard that word but never was from her mother. She heard it when her teacher was talking about… no, that can't be… she can't be._

_Cuddy, on the other hand, wasn't cut off from her senses by his comment alone but she was also drifted to another dimension when Simon's face and words began flooding her already hysterical thought. The memory of what they talked about earlier brought her nothing but fear and House opening it up tonight would surely be the poking stick that would make her fold._

_"You would let her go," the great doctor said as he slowly limped back towards his former lover as Cuddy was taken aback by his gesture, "just like what you did to me…"_

_"I let you go because that is what I'm supposed to do. I do not want to hear you say anything in connection with Rachel's name because you're not her damn father," the dean firmly said._

_"And neither are you!" House quickly added causing the four year old, out of their sight, flinched in surprise and it was not long after that a new streamline of tears began falling down._

_Back at the living room, the next thing House felt was a hand slap on his left cheek that he was sure will leave a mark by next day. Cuddy's arm went swiftly across his face that he didn't even got the chance to stop it and prevented the burning feeling to live on his face._

_"Were you really planning to slap every person that will state the obvious in the future?" he asked as he looked back up._

_"I didn't let you become part of that secret to use it against me like what you are doing right now," Cuddy answered tearfully._

_"I am not. I'm just putting your feet back on the ground…"_

_"House," she raised her tone, "I am Rachel's mother!"_

_"As a foster parent, yes… By blood…"_

_House was about to say what Cuddy expected him to say, a firm and sharply delivered 'NO', but both of their attention was diverted when they heard running steps away from the living room which was eventually ended by a loud thud which they assumed was the heavy slam of the door._

_'Ohgod, please let it not be Rachel,' Cuddy thought before looking back at House who looked at her with the same worried and shaken look._

_She gulped before walking hurriedly down her hallway only to be faced with four closed doors, and to her surprise, even her bedroom's. She first checked the common bath, it was open but there no was no Rachel, then the guest and soon after the four year old's bedroom. Both doors were open but like the first, there was no four year old booming in her eyes._

_Cuddy could feel her heart was racing and she knew she was crying flood-like tears to which she cared less. All she wanted was to have her daughter in her arms, to comfort and to explain everything what the girl might have heard. Sobbing, she reached for the knob of the final door, her bedroom's. She readied herself for anything but what she wasn't expecting was unfortunately the one she faced._

_"House!" he heard her shrieked his name in despair and before she calls out for the second time, he began limping as fast as his limpy leg could do and headed to where Cuddy was._

_***************  
_

_"What?" he asked as he stood a few steps away from her._

_A hundred tears might already have fallen but he was sure a thousand more will after Cuddy says, "Rachel locked herself in!"_

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_**So how was it? And BTW, do I need to end the flashbacks now? :) Any words from you is highly appreciated!  
**

**Thanks for reading!  
**


	11. Chapter 11

**Now for the 11th chapter I am dying to share with you. :) Once again, thank you for all the words you guys are giving me, I never get tired reading them! **

**This is a flashback again but not to worry, you'll see the 'present days' soon. For the meantime, enjoy reading! **

PS: Sorry if this is too lengthy

_

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For the tenth time that night, House tried opening Cuddy's bedroom door only to end up in no avail. As minutes turned to hours, guilt and worry began creeping into the dean's thought because for the last sixty minutes, all they could hear were sobs but never was a response for their call to open up. Frustrated, she headed down the hall and let the only man in the house to do it his way._

_"Open it up yet?" Cuddy asked as soon as House entered the living room a few minutes after she landed on the nearest couch she could get._

_"Given the fact that your bedroom seemed to have a vault-like lock, I doubt it," he answered as he placed the screwdriver he was holding on a side table next to him before noticing how Cuddy's face become more sad looking than five minutes ago._

_"Who are you calling?" he asked as he watched her picked up the phone and began dialing a number._

_"You think I'm ordering pizza? I'm calling a locksmith for heaven sake," she replied._

_House rolled his eyes in return and walked over to Cuddy and before she could protest or held back, the phone was already in his hand and the next thing she heard was the 'END' button's click filling the air._

_"A locksmith would be our last resort," he quickly answered her eyes that were both shooting daggers and questions at him._

_"House, I'm not playing games," she firmly stated, almost threatening to smack him right on that moment._

_"Neither am I," the diagnostician said before moving away and dialed a number he knew by heart._

_"If you know a better locksmith than I do, you should have told me. You don't have to snatch the phone away."_

_As soon as the person on the other line lifted his receiver, House quickly uttered, "We need you to get in here. ASAP," completely ignoring the comment the woman a few steps away from him said._

_***************  
_

_Minutes after her diagnostician dropped the phone alone, Cuddy heard her kitchen cupboards cracked open, one after the other. Curious on what he was doing, she walked straight to the kitchen and nearly blown by anger by the sight that greeted her._

_"What the…" she asked only to be cut off by his voice in midway. Her eyes were moving from right to left, eyeing each cupboard and floor cabinets that had been left opened by the cripple before her._

_"Do you have a sledge hammer or something close to it?" House asked as he ducked again to search for the tool he knew would help end the night's drama._

_"I doubt it but I'm surely I'll be getting one and use it to you," she replied before he reached the final floor cabinet, Cuddy began closing all that were left open._

_DING. DONG._

_As the doorbell sounded twice, House instantly shot himself upwards and said, "That's probably him."_

_"Him?" Cuddy asked who turned her head as well as soon as House straightened up, "who's 'him'?"_

_"McDonalds, who else would it be?" he sarcastically replied as he limped pass her and into the doorway._

_"So what's the 911 call about?" a male voice echoed around her place seconds later and she could tell whoever he is, he's coming closer judging by the volume of his voice which was apparently getting louder._

_"Figured you're way better than a former mental hospital patient and a hysterical mother in crimes like this," House explained as both of them made their way in the kitchen again._

_"Wilson?" Cuddy asked in bewilderment, her eyes moved from the oncologist to the six feet man beside him, "please tell me you didn't pull him out of his practice?"_

_"Come on, my reason isn't that bad," House answered before taking a glass and filling it with some water, "trust me, it'll be worth it. Besides, are you really letting your kid locked her self in?"_

_"House…" she uttered in a threatening tone for the second time that night._

_"Wu… wait, Rachel? Locked her self in?" Wilson interjected gaining both stares from the former couple before him._

_"No, she just grew up way too fast and didn't bother opening her mom's door just like what other teenagers do," the diagnostician sarcastically replied._

_"What happened?" the oncologist asked, his eyes filled with worry as he laid it on Cuddy._

_She gulped and finally admitted, "Rachel knew about our break up and…"_

_"And?"_

_"And about her being just a foster child…" Cuddy trailed off, her voice almost at the verge of breaking again._

_The moment she sat down on the nearest bar stool, she propped her head with her palm as her elbow touched the marble surface of her counter. As she did so, both men stared serious glances and even if House didn't bother moving or saying anything, Wilson knew what the man really wanted to do._

_"It's all my fault. Now my stubbornness is biting me on my ass, more painful than I thought it'll be," she added just before a sniff filled up the room again._

_There were no words coming from either of her doctors for the next five minutes. They just let her cry until her revelation brought both men back to their respective senses._

_"I…" she gulped before hesitantly saying, "Simon wanted to see his daughter…"_

_"What?!" House and Wilson asked in unison but the oncologist wasn't wearing the same angered expression the great doctor was wearing but faded just as quickly as how it appeared._

_"He couldn't just come around after four years and get the child from you," Wilson said as he came closer to the crying woman, "what are you a package counter?"_

_"He didn't say he'll be getting Rachel from me," Cuddy began to clarify, "he just wanted to see her."_

_"That's usually the start," House said in the background as he took a stool two seats away from his former girlfriend._

_"So, did Rachel hear that as worst?" Wilson asked after a brief silence from the three of them._

_"I don't think so. It's the foster thing I'm worried about. The trauma that might set off," the dean stated in between sobs._

_"Well, that's what therapists are employed for," the oncologist said as he walked over to his friend, "for the mean time, I'll see what I can do." He patted her back before giving his other friend a quick stare and headed down to the door that Cuddy wished to see open so soon._

_To House's own surprise, her tears began gushing stronger just like an hour ago as soon as Wilson disappeared before them. Her knuckles were inwardly curled in as she buried her face on top on it. Her back heaved repeatedly as her sobs became louder. Little did she know how the man beside her cursed himself for being too coward and blank on any idea that he could do to comfort her. He's not good on this. Give him math, language and even science not just this inevitable part of life. He sucked at this, and he hated it. But for some reason, he found himself lifting a box of tissue and jumping carefully out of the stool where he was seated. The next thing he felt was her body closed to him; his arm pulling her for a comforting embrace as the other grip on the counter edge for balance._

_That man wasn't House. That was Greg and it was also him who calmly said, "It'll be okay; things will be okay," just before his lips softly landed on her forehead._

_***************  
_

_House and Cuddy knew Wilson tried his best to talk Rachel out of the bedroom but like them, he received nothing in return. He was beyond willing to knock the door down but he didn't have much energy though and an emergency page from the hospital forced him to grab his coat and gather his belongings._

_"Keep me posted," the oncologist told House as both of them stood face to face on Cuddy's doorway._

_"Will do."_

_Wilson nodded in agreement before turning his head to the right only to see the dean leaning on her side against the hallway wall, her back facing them bothering not to say good-bye or anything. House followed his gaze short after and left out a sigh that one could say as his external sign anxiety._

_As his friend patted his arm, the diagnostician made a brief nod acknowledging his friend's departure and watched Wilson leave before closing the door beside him seconds later._

_In spite of the fact that he doesn't know what he was supposed to say or do the moment he reached the free space behind her, House decided to limp closer as he ran a palm at the back of his neck as he did so._

_"Hey," he instantly yet gently uttered as soon as he reached the desired space close to her, "you know, chairs were made for a reason."_

_Cuddy turned her head to face him before letting out a small forced laugh but was enough for him to sigh an internal relief knowing she could still do so in times like this. Sadly, the laugh quickly faded as despair began settling in her eyes again._

_"I'm also here for a reason," she dryly said, turning her head towards the door she's dying to see open for the last two hours._

_"Standing here won't make any difference though," House said after a brief silence between them. "It's too impossible that she won't come out. She's a kid, she'll be hungry, thirsty or just plain scared for the night. Come on, we'll wait for her in the living room," he added._

_"Says the man who'd rather hammer my door down than call a locksmith," she called out as House limped away._

_Finally admitting to her self House was right, Cuddy sighed and followed him back in the living room and slumped on a love seat for comfort. No words could exactly describe how she felt tonight. If this is a dream, she wanted to wake up and embrace reality, but she's not in Wonderland and she's not Alice. This is real; so real that the pain seemed to hold no plans on leaving her even in the future._

_House watched her intently as she propped her head on her hand as he stayed standing a few steps away from her. "What if she doesn't come out?" he heard her ask but her eyes never left the carpeted floor beneath her._

_"You didn't stuck a fridge in your room, did you?" the diagnostician asked gaining stare from her only to be removed two seconds later. She shook her head 'no'._

_"So we'll wait," he instantly declared before a deafening silence owned them._

_They both let the ticking of the clock be the only sound in the room for quite a few minutes until House spoke the words Cuddy wasn't expecting him to say, "I'm sorry…"_

_Her head immediately shot up and her eyes landed straight on the man with the head slightly bowed down before him. She was ready to ask why but was answered beforehand when he added, this time finally looking at her, "If I didn't blab it out, you wouldn't be like this… she wouldn't be like this…"_

_She gulped as she watched his fingers wrestled with the other, a thing he seldom do when he's serious yet doubtful of his actions._

_"This is bound to happen anyway," Cuddy uttered, "you just set it off earlier than I've expected."_

_He nodded in understanding but it doesn't mean he'll shoo the crappy feeling he had been keeping inside. Since the time he learned Rachel locked her self in, he had been hitting his soul for what he knew he did._

_"If there's someone who should be locking her self in, it should be me," the dean said that only made House's brows end met in annoyance._

_"Come on," he gently urged as he took the empty space beside her, allowing the Greg part of him handle the situation, "self pity isn't you."_

_"Am I not allowed to feel this way?" Cuddy asked as she turned her head towards him after wiping her tears away._

_"I'm not saying you're not entitled to, it's just that you make a crappy decision maker in that state," he said, "and after all those tears you cried, do you really want to welcome Rachel back and let her see how ugly her mother turned out to be?"_

_Cuddy let out a small laugh that made House tugged a smile himself. She suddenly nudged him at his side and teased, "You're an ass."_

_"A brilliant one though." A smile curved up on her face before she let her head leaned on his shoulder as she let out a sigh of relief. As she did so, she was obviously oblivious of the fact that the man she's leaning on was now staring down at her, smiling in return as he heard say, "Thanks for staying in for the night."_

_***************  
_

_House knew he must have dozed off for thirty minutes because the next thing he saw was the clock reading 1:05. As his conscious mind takes over his still sleepy brain, the feeling of numbness slowly began to register at his right shoulder though he knew he was comfortably leaning back. It was the slightly heavy matter that brought his eyes down to look at the being beside him._

_Rising up and down as his chest did the same, Cuddy drifted her self off into a world where House wanted to know if he was also in. Her eyes were closed as her lips were ajar as she breathes in and out._

_Wanting nothing more but to see her peacefully sleeping this way, he began to slowly ease himself out only to feel a failure when she began to stir in small motions. Looking down at her again, he sigh a relief when her eyes were still shut after what he did._

_As he tugged a simple smile, his eyes darted on the living room doorway catching an image that nearly leap his heart out of his ribs in surprise. His closed his eyes for a moment and thought he was hallucinating again as he pulled Cuddy closer to him for safety._

_He slowly popped his eyes open and let out a heavy breathe the moment a pair of blue eyes he knew by heart met his own. He was right, and the image before him made him chuckle as Rachel stared back at him, one arm hugged a bowl of what seemed to be cereals while the other held a half filled spoon._

_It only dawned to him that the four year old, clad in her long sleeping dress, might have seen the way he and Cuddy cuddled close to each other while they were in La-la land. As she brought the spoon in her mouth, another smile was drawn on his lips._

_He let her chew two or three crunches before quietly saying, "Come here."_

_Rachel did what she was invited to do before receiving a kiss from House. As the kid stood in front of him, he leaned to the woman beside him, shook her gently and softly said, "Someone's here to see you."_

_The four year old and the doctor exchanged smiles before looking at Cuddy who was now lifting her head and shooting her eyes open. The moment her grey eyes met the kid's blue ones, all the dean could say was, "Ohmygod, you're here. You're here." As she instantly pulled Rachel for a warm embrace.

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_

**If you are asking, 'how soon is soon?' you'll find out, just read on. :D  
**

**Flashbacks will still be read but not in that chapter; I just have to insert some present scenes so you won't forget what is really happening. Do you like the idea?**

**I value my readers' comment than I do with mine, so drop by a note and tell me about it.**

**Once again, thanks for reading!  
**


	12. Chapter 12

**Hey guys, sorry for a late update. Took me a while to write this chap up because I've been busy for the last few days. Nevertheless, here we are to the 12th chapter. As always, I talk you for all the wonderful reviews you give me. :)**

**Am I the only one who notice that the chapter below is not written italics? ;) I'm sure you know what this means... so... Read on! :)  
**

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The hallway he was walking on wasn't new to him. If walls and flooring could speak, they would openly admit that they've seen his face almost everyday during those times when he wanted to ditch clinic duty or to hide as he eat other doctor's food. Yet tonight, everything seemed to be so different. So different that as House approached the double doors, he wanted to neglect the capitally written and shiny sign that says 'MORGUE' just above the room's doorway.

The few tears he secretly shed at the back hallway was finally washed away but he still felt like he was dragging metal balls around his feet as he continue to urge himself to compose himself as the double doors of hell grew bigger as he come closer. As he set himself to stop, he knew he was having second thoughts to push the right door open but instead, he felt his arm raising and the next thing he knew was the light of the room owning his sight.

"What are you doing here?" he asked as his eyes were laid on a man seated, beside a corpse rested on a metal table, his feet on an unexpected halt.

The man before him turned but didn't bother standing up from the stool he was seated on. As he did so, the dim light of the room slowly drew his features that confirmed House's assumption.

"You're not allowed here," the great doctor said dismissively as he continued to walk to where the man was.

"I just wanted to see her for the last time," Simon answered, as he eyed the doctor who leaned his behind on the vacant table before him.

"You still could but not for the next three hours or so."

"I don't think… I could…" the young man said before turning his back and looking at Rachel again. His admission made House nod in agreement knowing he felt exactly the same way.

"It sucks that I didn't get to spend time with her a lot," Simon said after a brief silence between them.

House watched him as he repeatedly stroke her daughter's forehead as if putting the little angel to sleep. He could feel the surge of tears coming down under his eyelids as the last memory of him, doing the same thing, began flooding his subconscious.

"You're lucky you did," the young man commented before sniffing that made House conclude he was quietly sobbing again, "It must be hard for you too," he added.

The great doctor nodded in spite of the idea that Rachel's birth father wouldn't see him do so. As the words sunk in deeper, the pain he shooed away minutes earlier seemed to be coming back as worst, tightening his chest at the same time.

"I…" House tried to speak up only to be cut off by Simon.

"Rache would always say she was proud to have you…"

"She shouldn't," the doctor said that made Simon spun around and as soon as the young man's brown ones met his blue, and he added, "I didn't do anything to save her," and not a second later, he bowed his head down.

Simon slightly tilted his head and let out a tired smile in return. He doesn't want to blame House for what had happened. The doctor tried to help, but he had cuts and bleeding of his own. If it weren't even for him, the ambulance could have not come earlier and Rachel would surely not be the only corpse lying in the morgue that night.

"You did save her," the young man assured with a more affirming smile that made House shot his head up to meet his looks, "you played the role I wasn't able to play and that was enough to consider saving."

House held on to his gaze until their moment was disrupted when they heard the door cracked open. Both of their stares landed on Dr. Watson, one of PPTH's best yet new post mortem vascular surgeons, who stopped in midway returning stares as well.

Even if he would not say it out loud for both men to hear, House knew he felt his heart being shattered in pieces the moment Watson walked in. He sighed knowing it was time for another inevitable moment to take place, a moment not even him could neglect. If this was any other patient, he would have stayed but tonight, he found himself walking over the metal table and looking down at the body he never dreamed to see be the one receiving Watson's scalpels and chisels.

This is the last time he'll be seeing Rachel with complete organs just like other human beings, the only thing that differs was that she's not breathing. He could feel Simon and Watson's stares burning at the back of his neck, but he cared less as he leaned down closer and planted a kiss on Rachel's cold forehead. It wasn't the same soft and smooth, it was white and cold.

***************

As soon as the double doors broke open, House's eyes landed on Cuddy's mother who was seated on one of the chairs installed outside the morgue. She immediately shot her heads up the moment she heard the door squeaked open and watched Simon walk away shortly after.

"They're starting up?" Carmen, Cuddy's mother, quietly asked after a brief sniffle and a quick wipe of tears.

House nodded, knowing all along the question and whatever conversation will follow will be meant for him since it were only the two of them who were in the hallway at the moment.

"About to be," he added after taking the empty space beside her.

If he didn't repeatedly but gently tap his cane on the floor, the moment would surely be eaten up by complete silence. Neither one of them wanted to speak, let alone look at each other straight to the eyes.

"Thought you were with Cuddy," the doctor said after a few minutes though eyes still not meeting each other.

"We didn't go home," Carmen replied.

"She should."

"Well, she isn't," she said before turning her head and look at the man beside him, who eventually did the same. She wasn't just prepared to see the radiating worry the usual 'I am not caring' doctor was wearing. "Don't worry, Julia's with her," she added that was replied with a nod.

"Why aren't you?" he asked.

Cuddy's mother arched one eyebrow but with a knowing smile at the same time, "The question is, why aren't you?" When House averted his eyes she added, "You're supposed to be there too."

"Julia's better on caring," he flatly replied.

"But Julia's not you, Greg," the moment Carmen said his name, House immediately shot his head up again either because he was never called Greg other than by his parents and Stacy or because he found some truth in her words. "You're the one with Lisa when she had Rachel," she added, "no matter how caring Julia sister is, she will never share the same pain as you and Lisa have right now."

He nodded but kept his mouth shut as he dropped his head again.

"Just give her some space," Carmen advised.

"Exactly what I'm doing right now," House commented as he watched the tip of his cane twirl on the floor in front of him.

"But not to the point that Lisa could go on with her life even without you." His eyes finally met hers. "Don't let this accident make the worst move to end your relationship for the second time," she once again advised.

"This is not an accident," House said with a slight eye roll and tone of annoyance, "some jackass intentionally killed her. It's not his knife who took away her life, he was the one handling the knife. He did it."

He didn't want to be mean but judging by the tears that were forming under her eyes, he knew he sounded like one. Carmen knew by the words he said how House wanted to crush the man who killed their Rachel but so far, cops couldn't find him, not even the two other men who went with him.

As soon as she finished cleaning up her eyes again, Carmen sniffled and handed him a paper bag he just happened to notice that time. "Lisa said she wanted Rachel to wear this one," she said in between quiet sobs.

House took it and pulled out the garment he knew he already saw and held before.

"Now she could finally use it," Carmen said, eyes not leaving a second on the dress now fully exposed under the hallway light.

"And Lise could also finally…" it was half way when she knew she couldn't finish her sentence. Tears had come by again before a loud cry shortly followed.

Slowly, House lowered the sky blue dress on his lap but his eyes never darted away from it as he did so. His fingers slowly began to trace the silk ribbon on the waistline and crystal beads as he said, "The kid planned to wear this on her school play. She loved it the first time she saw it."

A small smile crept on his face as he began remember. Carmen looked at him with much curiosity as to why House knew about the dress and her daughter doesn't.

The doctor turned to her and admitted, "I gave this to her."

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**Yah, a very chapter I would say. This is just a heads up for more...**

**Anyway, reviews are always welcome, good or bad. :)**

**Thanks for reading!  
**


	13. Chapter 13

**Okay, I am, once again, sorry for somehow a late update. This should have been earlier but because of many things that went through the week, I ended up posting this today (and, it's really hard to write the things I wrote below). Guys, I love all the reviews and story alerts that I'm getting. I also would like to say thank you for those who prayed for my and my fellowmen's safety when we got warned for a Tsunami that might happen. I thought Chapter 12 will be the last chapter but look, here I am (thank you) bringing you the 13th chapter!**

**Sorry if this chap seemed to be so long, this chapter is needed and might be the end of the flashback you guys are reading.**

**So... Happy Reading!**

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It has been three hours since House got in his office yet nothing changed. Rachel was still dead and he was still alone. It's not like he was expecting things to but he was expecting the result of his life's sudden change. He knew his intellectual capacity but he doesn't know how he'll react on whatever findings Watson will be presenting to him but he doesn't have to wait for so long, because shortly after he gulped another swig of scotch, his office door swung opened and Watson walked in.

"Autopsy result's out," the young doctor declared. House nodded and took the result without question. As his eyes landed on the result, the memory of the crime began creeping by…

_"You can't be serious," House silently protest as he held his cell phone close to his ear._

_"Actually I can and right now, I am," Cuddy replied at the other end of the line getting nothing in response. "So can you do it for me?" she asked after a few seconds of silence between them._

_Unsure of what to say, he turned his head to the right and eyed Rachel as the little girl packed up the things needed for the day's event. The smile on her lips made it harder for him to say 'okay' and agree on what the dean requested him to do._

_It took them a few weeks to bring back the Rachel they knew since the night the kid learned about her being adopted and about her mother and the great doctor's break up. Within that span of time, he didn't bother coming close to Cuddy whenever he sees her with the kid, after all he doesn't want to give wrong signal to the little girl who was having a hard time then adjusting on having no-House around their home._

_It was also during those days when Cuddy felt threatened with Simon's presence. Not wanting to be selfish though, she agreed to let the young man see his daughter. It was hard for the three of them at first but the second time they met up in a park, Simon and Rachel got along very well that lead to a few more afternoons together._

_House knew this just like he knew about Cuddy calling her lawyer and arranging papers with her. She wanted to legally adopt Rachel as soon as she could, even if it means paying double for processing rush papers. He knew Simon was no near on the idea of taking back his daughter but given their post-break up situation, he held himself back knowing he wasn't the same man she probably would listen to._

_Until one night, House drove the dean home after she called him up because her car broke down. They stood face to face with each other, saying thanks you's and good-bye's as the solemnity of the night drowned them. He kissed her unexpectedly and she answered more passionately and both didn't know how intense it was until they woke up by next morning, sprawled naked next to each other._

_In spite of what happened, they didn't want to label their relationship. As far as Rachel knew, House was still her mother's ex-boyfriend though she seemed to be feeling a little déjà vu whenever he come down and sometimes, slept in like no break up happened. Whatever was happening behind her mother's closed bedroom door, she didn't care as long as, by day, she sees the great doctor eating breakfast with them._

_"Still there?" Cuddy's voice snapped him out of his memory call making him flinched a little before removing his gaze on the little girl who was now fixing the ribbon on top of her head._

_"Yah, I'm still up," he flatly said, "what were you saying?"_

_He knew she rolled her eyes before saying, "I said, drive down with her to the day care and we'll meet there. Simon already called me up, he's already waiting for both of you."_

_"Can't you ditch that goddamn board meeting for your daughter?"_

_"House, please, not today. This is an emergency board meeting, I can't just leave."_

_He said nothing more but heavily breathed. He knew he won't win, a board meeting is a board meeting, so all he could do is to urge Cuddy to wrap up everything as fast as she could or she'll be missing seeing her daughter perform on her second school play._

_"Fine," he finally said, "but she doesn't have any make up yet so don't blame me if you see her on stage with a clown make up which I obviously did." He heard her chuckled and said thank you before snaping his cell phone shut._

_***************  
_

_"So, mommy's on the way?" Rachel innocently asked as she eyed House from the mirror as he walked in her bedroom. He nodded, not wanting to disappoint any positive energy that was running inside the little girl's system, besides he knew Cuddy meant it when she said she will be with them as soon as the damn meeting ends._

_"You're ready to show the dress off to your mom?" he asked causing the little girl to spin around and looked at him. He expected a 'yes' for an answer but instead he got a four year clinging on to him as tight as she could._

_"Thank you," she sweetly uttered. In spite of being known as a grumpy person, House found himself smiling while patting the little girl's back._

_"Come on," he said while gently pushing the kid away, "I'm just going to get something from your mom's room. You go downstairs and wait for me, okay?"_

_"Okay," Rachel agreed with a nod and just before he walked out from her room, he heard her called out, "House," he spun around, "I love you."_

_He smiled back and said, "You know I love you too," before completely walking out._

_***************  
_

_As police sirens were coming closer down the streets, House opened Cuddy's top drawer and pulled out a spare shirt she ordered him to bring for her. He didn't know how annoying the wailing was until the sound seemed to be a lawn away from where he was. As he packed the shirt in his bag, he shook off the memory of the night when he got pulled over by Tritter and was detained for nothing and as he zipped the bag close, he was more than happy to know the sirens seemed to be moving farther from Cuddy's neighborhood._

_The next two minutes of House's life seemed to happened in a blink of an eye, in less than five minutes, as he stepped out of the dean's bedroom, a loud bang echoed from the kitchen back door. A lot of thought began racing in his head but he only cared one thing, one being._

_"Rachel," he said to himself before dropping the bag down and limping as fast as he could down the hall only to stopped in midway as his eyes landed on the four year old who was standing a step lower than the floor where he was._

_The way she was standing made him limped faster than he did seconds earlier, the kid seemed to be stunned as she raised both her arms in an inverted "T" position._

_"Hey," he said as he pulled the four year old higher and closer to him. In an instant he hugged her protectively still not knowing what was happening. As Rachel buried her face in the crook of his neck, he let his palm rest on the kid's nape and asked, "What's wrong? Are you okay?"_

_The next thing he heard were her quiet sobs but the next thing he saw was something he wasn't prepared for. There, at the foot of the stairs was a man peeping from the living room, wearing a black bonnet, clad in leather jacket and… was holding a gun._

_"Crap! The girl got her father in here!" the intruder cried to someone who House knew might be in the living room with him._

_In an instant, the doctor stood up and tried with all his might to pull Rachel back into her mother's bedroom where he thought might be the safest place to be in at the moment. The four year old quickly followed his lead but to their fear, the man who was peeping in earlier made it to the second floor and this time with two more "buddies" with him, all of them had their arms extended forward with guns in their hands._

_"Don't move!" declared one of the men, "or we'll shoot!"_

_House stopped and stared at the three armed men in front of them as he slowly moved Rachel behind him. All of them were panting while the little girl was busy shedding tears._

_"Put the cane down," the slightly fat one named Nick ordered as he, with his two other fellows, moved closer. When House realized the burglars held no plans of loosening up their grips on the guns, he decided to obey than snark a remark._

_He heard the bedroom door cracked open behind him and Rachel's grip on his waist suddenly went loose. He panicked especially when the four year old yelled a sound of hurt. His blood boiled inside of him as his eyes landed on the hand that was tightly gripping the kid's little arm._

_"Get your hands off her!" House yelled as he moved in one motion, smacking the guy's head against the door frame that made a pretty ugly thud that echoed almost around the house. In spite of his limp, he was able to knocked the head twice against the wall but when he was about to give another blow, the two other intruders pulled him away, forcefully throwing him inside the room._

_As he turned his head back, it was in time for him to see Rachel being shoved after him. With equal force as he got, no matter how young she may looked like. The shoving was so fast that House weren't able to catch and save Rachel from hitting the bed's mahogany foot board and by the time he was able to held Cuddy's daughter, all he could see was cut on her forehead that was leaking a streak of blood._

_As he traced the blood line on the little girl's head, he knew this isn't no nightmare. This was really happening yet this CAN'T be happening. He wanted nothing more but to call the cops and an ambulance because given how young Rachel was, he doesn't know how long the little girl could hold up the tension and the blood that was beginning to get drain out of her head. For now, he was thankful that Rachel was still breathing and her crying was a sign she was still with him._

_"If we hear anything from both of you, you'll be getting more than cuts and bruises!" threatened the man wearing black named Radtke before turning his head back and ordered the other fellow named Billy to cut the phone cord so House and Rachel won't have contact with the outside world._

_"And if you tried to escape," Radtke added as Billy pulled House's phone from his pocket, "BANG!" he sounded which was followed by an evil grin._

_"You're holding gun, I hold nothing. Who said we'll try? Just get the things you want and go away!" House yelled back as he held Rachel closer._

_"You heard the man," Radtke said as he turned his head to his fellows, "search up." As soon as Nick and Billy left his sight, he leaned on the doorframe beside him eyeing the great doctor as he pulled a used shirt to wipe the blood off the kid's face._

_"Just stay with me," Rachel said in between sobs as she snuggled closer._

_"Sshh, I will. You know I will," House quietly said as he caressed the little girl's back._

_Rolling his eyes in disgust, Radtke said, "You better be here when I come back!" and with that he disappeared._

_In an instant, House pulled himself up and silently ordered Rachel to come right after him. They walked over to one corner where a window can be found. "Sshh, stop crying, we'll get out. Call the cops and have them in jail," the doctor silently said as he tried to push their only passage out open._

_A smile began curving on his lips the moment it began sliding open only to be hear a yell behind them in midway, "They're walking out!"_

_House instantly pushed Rachel away from him to save the four year old from what was about to happen. As soon as Nick and Radtke joined Billy in the room, the three of them hardly pushed House against the adjacent wall. His back making contact with Cuddy's statuettes that made a loud thud that scared the crap out of Rachel causing her to cry some more._

_They knew it wasn't enough to the fifty year old man, so taking his limpy state as an advantage, Nick walked over and pulled him up and it was Billy who repeatedly elbowed him on his chest and stomach followed by Radtke who kicked him on the nuds that instantly made him kneel in spite of his throbbing leg._

_Knowing he hasn't taken his part on their torture party, Nick kicked House that sent the doctor backwards like he was just hit by Manny Pacquiao's strong jabs. As soon as the three men left his side, Rachel could clearly see how House was un-humanly beaten. Cuts and bruises almost owned most of his face and there were scars along his arms and neck. His wrinkled shirt and pants were damped with few drops of blood either coming from his nose, mouth or wouds._

_"You liked what you see?" Radtke asked as he landed his evil stares on Rachel who was then trembling in fright. She shook her head. "Oh don't worry," he said as he came closer to the little girl, "you'll see something you will surely like," he finish as he took the little girl's hand._

_"What are you doing?" Nick asked as he averted his gaze from Rachel, who was taking her hand away, to Radtke, who stared back at him._

_"Didn't you hear what I said? I'm just going to show this little girl something she will surely like."_

_"Hey, you can't be serious when you said…" Billy trailed off, unable to finish the sentence he knew he can't even imagine saying._

_"I was not. But that was then, but when I saw the picture of her mom," Radtke said as he pointed to Cuddy's picture settled in the book shelf, "I got turned on. She's a total MILF," he finished with an evil smug on his face._

_"Come on man, you can't do that. We should leave now. We just ran away from the cops. Any minute they could show up!" Nick added._

_Radtke wet his lips and stared both his fellows and firmly said, "You two, stay out of this if you want to stay alive!" before looking down at Rachel and said, "Bitch come on!"_

_Rachel began to struggle that instantly annoyed him. It was also the reason why he raised his hand, that was holding the gun, and without a doubt, land it on the kid's face._

_"Radtke!" Billy and Nick shouted in unison._

_"House!" Rachel loudly cried out yet the doctor couldn't help because of his own state and though Billy and Nicky wanted to cut the crap now, they couldn't move a single motion knowing even their souls were being held by their boss now._

_"Ahhh!" the four year old managed to yell in between sobs and struggle as Radtke pushed her gently on the doorframe on their way where he began trailing hot kisses on the kids' neck, dropping his gun somewhere on the floor._

_"Shut up!" the man yelled at her before trailing a warning cut on her stomach with his pocket knife._

_"No," House first said in barely above whisper voice as his slightly blurry vision saw the act, "no…"_

_He saw Radtke peeled the kid off the frame and carried her to her own bedroom; and in between the little girl's yell of help and a cry, all the great doctor could do was to shout with all what's left of him, "NO!!!"_

"House…" He knew he was hearing someone calling his name. "House…"

"Dr. House…" came a second voice, different from the first one, shaking him back to the present day. His eyes met two pairs after he blinked his own twice. Watson and Wilson's.

"You're crumpling the result, you okay?" the oncologist said as he eyed the now crumpled piece of autopsy result that was being tightly held by his friend.

Instead of words, all they got was an angered expression of House's face as he rolled the result further into a ball that made both men stand in surprise. He heavily breathed in and let his balled fist slammed his glass desk, almost breaking it. His action and the loud sound it made caused Watson and Wilson to flinch and the next thing they met were House's fierce eyes, flaming with desire to kill.

Exhaling deeply for the last time he said, "Rachel was raped."

* * *

**Yah, I am such a bad girl for wanting it to happen and I need your thoughts about the crime.**

**Any kind of reviews would do. As always, thank you for reading!  
**


	14. Chapter 14

**Ha, finally. An update. :) I'm happy you guys have given your reviews on the horrible thing that happened in the last chapter, I really love reading them and all I could say is "Thank you!" for all of those; and as a head start, this chapter, will also shock you. :))**

**Happy reading!**

* * *

"Dr. House…" came a second voice, different from the first one, shaking him back to the present day. His eyes met two pairs after he blinked his own twice. Watson and Wilson's.

"You're crumpling the result, you okay?" the oncologist said as he eyed the now crumpled piece of autopsy result that was being tightly held by his friend.

Instead of words, all they got was an angered expression of House's face as he rolled the result further into a ball that made both men stand in surprise. He heavily breathed in and let his balled fist slammed his glass desk, almost breaking it. His action and the loud sound it made caused Watson and Wilson to flinch and the next thing they met were House's fierce eyes, flaming with desire to kill.

Exhaling deeply for the last time he said, "Rachel was raped."

***************

As soon as the three letter word landed Wilson's ear, he knew his jaw have dropped an inch or so. His eyes were wide open as he tried his best to pull himself together again.

Rachel was raped… Rachel was raped… Rachel was raped...

The word kept playing inside his head but it was his thoughts that voluntarily shoo the information away. He could feel his eyes beginning to water as anger, deep grief and concern for both House and Cuddy duel within him but he knew, whatever emotion he was holding was just an inch compared to whatever emotion that was surging through his best friend's system.

"I…" he tired to speak up but find himself gulping instead knowing he doesn't know what to say.

Standing frozen, he watched the diagnostician turned his back from them. The paper was still in his hand and the sound that he was making while crumpling the paper was still there. He knew that the thought of losing Rachel alone was already heavy enough for the man to take and knowing how her life was short lived was a different and a lot heavier story.

Taking the silence as his cue to leave, Watson decided to do so and even if Wilson wanted to do the same, he rather found himself speaking up as soon as he heard the glass door close behind him.

"I'm… I'm sorry," the oncologist said, barely above whisper.

"If you wanted to talk…" he added when House returned nothing, "I'm here."

"I'm fine," the diagnostician said with his back still facing his best friend.

"It's okay to feel depress and angered by this. It's just the normal way ---"

"Right, except for the fact that I don't feel anything."

"Oh cut the crap!" Wilson burst upon hearing the lie that made House spun around to meet his stares, "you don't have to lie. The way you crumpled the result speaks how much you wanted to scare the hell out of the man who did it to Rachel. You wanted him in front of you, on his knees as he begged for his dear life as you beat him up!"

"Are you done?" House asked, trying his best to look and to stay grounded though his thoughts would approved on the things that his best friend just said. In fact, he wanted to do more. More brutal, and more bloody than what Wilson had pictured.

At the moment, he knew he could do it… if and only if the cops have the bastard right now.

With chest still heaving from his outburst, Wilson watched as the six foot man walk passed him.

"You're going to see Cuddy?" he asked that made his friend turn his heels and faced him.

"Rooftop," the diagnostician replied after a quick head shake before turning and began walking to the door again.

"When are you going to tell her?" the oncologist asked that made House stopped and faced him for the second time.

"Not anytime soon," his friend flatly replied.

"House," Wilson began, "if there's one person who should know about this, I say it should be Cuddy," the oncologist added as he made his way in front of his friend.

They stood still for a second, with eyes locked with the other. Intense blue meeting anxious brown.

"I know, telling her isn't easy. It never is from the first place but…" the oncologist said only to be cut off when his friend turned and walk away from him, pulling the glass door open yet both feet didn't left the carpeted office.

"You want to tell Cuddy about what happened to her daughter? Go ahead but don't expect me to be there when she goes crazy upon hearing those fucking words," House spat back, indirectly voicing his concern but with much worry a lover would display.

"Not telling her would make things worse!" Wilson threw back.

Judging by the look he traced on his friend's face, he knew House was ready to deliver his own attack, louder and more intense than what he did, but a knock on the glass door made both of them land their stares to the being who was standing by the doorway.

"Dr. House," Jeff started, "Dr. Cuddy's mother wanted to know if you know Dr. Cuddy went home?"

"I thought she's with Julia," the diagnostician asked, worry owning much of his tone.

"Apparently not," the nurse replied before watching House tuned his head to look at his friend who was still standing behind him.

"Still want to tell her?" House sarcastically asked Wilson before limping his way out of his office and riding the latest elevator ride.

***************

"Cuddy," House called out as he closed the front door behind him upon entering Julia's Plainsboro place, to which Carmen told him her youngest daughter went.

Dropping his outer coat, his eyes scanned the house for any motion he might consider as man-made though at the end, he found nothing. He could feel the urge to leave but he came here for something, for someone and he won't leave until that person's with him, safe and sound around his arm.

"Lisa…" her name slipped out of his lips more anxious-sounding than what he wanted it to be.

He checked in the living room, dining and kitchen but all three weren't occupied by the being he was looking for. As second turn to minutes, House could feel the panic slowly creeping in inside him.

'They said she's here,' he said to himself as he limped his way down on the first floor hallway where finally, he could hear a faucet running.

"Hey, it's me, House," he said after giving a knock on the door that would lead him to the common bathroom.

He waited for the faucet to stop and for her to open up, only to realize ten minutes later that a pond of water was beginning to eat the space beneath him, soaking his shoes in the process.

"What the ---" he held back as another realization struck him.

His eyes grew wide before he looked up to the door and began hammering it with strong knocks.

"Cuddy!" He knocked but got nothing in response, "Cuddy, open the damn door!"

The moment he knew the knob was locked, panicked finally owned him. In an instant, he lifted his cane and began hammering the knob with its hook, each pound was stronger than the first. At the moment, he cared less about the damage his actions could do to his beloved cane or how big the hole on the door he'll make, all he wanted was to push the door open and see what Cuddy was up to.

The next two minutes went in a flash and the next thing House faced was an over pouring tub and a towel that seemed to be carelessly dropped on the floor earlier and was now drowned by the flowing and bubbly water.

He could have easily went out and leave again but as soon as his eyes landed on a figure in the water, his heart stopped but he waited no time to walked fast to the tub where he knew he should brace himself for something more than what he'd seen earlier.

And indeed, it was something more.

With all the strength he could gather and use, he pulled Cuddy up from the water, who was lifeless for what seemed to be a few minutes now. Her lips and skin were almost identical in color as paleness coated her usual tan skin tone.

"Cuddy… Cuddy, wake up," he ordered with shaky voice as his medical experiences seemed to be taking the backseat in his mind when every other shake, he got nothing back.

"What the hell Cuddy?! WAKE UP!" he finally yelled as his eyes watched her head limply fall back on his arms.

Setting things back in his mind, he dive his head down and smashed his lips on to hers, inhaling the trapped bubble of air inside Cuddy's throat before literally giving her his own.

His first attempt to revive her did nothing so he went in for another and just before he signal himself for the third, he felt her chest rose up as she gather the earthly air for her self this time.

Both of them were panting as his arms still protectively held her. As Cuddy lifted her tired grey eyes, all she met were House's wide and disbelieving ones.

"Ha… Hou… se," she tried to speak up but end up coughing at the end.

"Shut up before I book you a room in Mayfield for trying to kill yourself," he replied, trying his best to show no emotion at all though his heart was still heavily pounding his chest because of what happened.

"I… didn't…" she defended, "I… fell… asleep."

House looked down at her but she couldn't do the same, knowing he'll read her thoughts through her eyes. She wanted to untangle herself from his grip but her body can't even move an arm, let alone stand and walk away.

Rolling his eyes when he realized she won't look back for the next ten minutes, House pulled the nearest towel and dried her.

Indeed, there's no way he'll tell her about what he found out.

* * *

**So, do you think House won't really tell her? Or will he?**

**How will Cuddy find out? Will she even find it out? How will she handle it?**

**And oh, Radtke and his gang are still in the streets of Princeton - Plainsboro!**

**Stay tune to know what lies ahead but before that, tell me about what you think about this chapter. :)**

**As always, "Thanks for Reading!"  
**


	15. Chapter 15

**Ha, finally another update. Thank you for all the words you continually give to me. It's my pleasure to receive and read them all. :) In return, now I'm giving you the 15th chapter.**

**Happy reading!

* * *

**Picking up the bag of pretzel, House rolled his eyes when he realized it hasn't been opened. The bag doesn't even look touched since he left it beside a glass of milk twenty minutes earlier. And to his annoyance, even the milk itself.

Hearing the bathroom door opened, he closed his eyes before turning to face Cuddy with the bag of pretzel still in his hand. He stayed silent as his eyes traced her back and behind that were apparently clothed with matching bra and panties.

"Coming out with only your bra and undies on won't slip you out from what you've done, woman," he flatly delivered.

"And these aren't touched yet," he added when he got nothing back, referring on the food he was holding and the milk on the coffee table beside him.

"I'll get right on that as soon as I'm finish here," she declared as she pulled out a baggy shirt and a pair of yoga pants out of Julia's drawer.

The next twenty seconds were eaten by silence as he watched her dressed up and walked over next to him. In spite of the penetrating gaze she could feel he's burning at the side of her face, Cuddy stayed silent and laid her eyes on something not just on his ocean blues.

Running his palm as another wave of annoyance crept through his system, he threw the bag short after that made the woman beside him dart her eyes back on him.

"You're still aren't believing me, are you?" she asked as soon as the lips of the glass and hers parted ways. Her eyes trying to read anything new that might surface on the diagnostician's face but there was nothing aside from his brows coming end to end at the center and his body landing on the loveseat behind him.

"Of course I do, falling asleep in a filled tub and drowning my self is something I am fun of doing too," he sarcastically threw back with eyes speaking that what apparently happened was no joke at all.

He heard her heavily breathed before watching her land herself on the bed in front of him.

"I didn't try to kill myself," Cuddy said barely above whisper as she laid her eyes on the honeywood floor beneath them.

"I did fell asleep but I did not. Drowned. Myself," she clarified with voice at the verge of breaking.

Her crackling voice was the reason why House pushed himself up from where he was seated. By the time he settled on the space beside her, she began to sob and his urge to pull her for a hug wasn't suppressed anymore.

"I want her back, House," she said as she buried her face on his chest, "I want her back…"

He sighed as his fingers began to soothe her by drawing small circles on her opposite shoulder. It was to his advantage that her head was beneath his because the sound of her sobs alone was tearing him up and seeing tears eating most of the space in her eyes will only pull him down together with her. A combination which neither of them need at the moment.

"We can't take her back and I can't lose you either," he said.

"I don't want to," he added, barely above whisper.

***************

"Lisa…" Carmen softly called out the moment her eyes landed on her daughter who just walked in the funeral home three hours later. House following shortly after her.

She could tell how negatively stunned her youngest was as her grey eyes landed on the metal casket that was placed at the other end of the room. The atmosphere was solemn but there were still small whispers coming from chatters who happened to be some doctors, donors and nurses and few family friends who went to sympathize with them for the loss.

Cuddy knew every step she takes would make her closer to the inevitable sight she doesn't even want to see even in dreams. Every step was shaky, doubtful, retrieving but at the end, she found herself hovering above her little girl whose eyes were shut as if she was only sleeping.

Once again, she could feel the tears coming up around her eyes as her hand met her daughter's forehead. As a doctor she knew what to feel but as the first inch of her fingers met Rachel's skin, she flinched at the coldness she felt. They were no longer soft and smooth but rather rough and cold. At that very moment, she realized everything was indeed real.

Small patches of bruises were covered by make-ups but not the pale lips the kid now had. Watson didn't also bother fixing further small cuts on her angelic face as that might just make her look like Chuckie.

At the other end of the room, House stood still watching every step and action Cuddy did. She did what he knew she'll do and was thankful that, so far, everything was doing fine. Cuddy was taking her loss in a lower level but that doesn't mean she have accepted Rachel's loss. The journey to heal was just starting and the end was still out of sight.

A number of people in their field walked over to House to say their sympathy before Wilson came closer, grabbing the diagnostician's attention as he did so.

"Someone wants to see you," he immediately delivered, feeling the slight tension between them because of the argument they had earlier.

"Who?" House asked.

"Bells," Wilson named.

***************

As the door of the private room swung opened, Inspector Bells stood up and was ready to eye whoever will come in. He had been in the room for awhile but the information he has is worth waiting for the man he wanted to talk with.

"Here he is," Wilson announced as he closed the door behind and as House walked over to the inspector and shook hands with him.

"What do we have?" House immediately asked, wanting nothing but to know any progress.

In return, Bells didn't answer but handed him the manila envelope he had been holding since he got out of his office.

"We got them the other night. They didn't run away or anything. In fact, they admitted the crime," the inspector proudly stated as the doctor pulled out the contents and began looking through the pictures he was now holding.

The urge to meet them and kill them once again overtook his system but then…

"These are only the two guys. Where's the other one?" he asked as he held out a picture of Bill and Nick, both wearing their inmate uniform.

Bells sighed and looked away.

"We… haven't found Radtke." Upon seeing the look on the diagnostician's face, he quickly added, "But we're doing the best we can."

"You better be," the doctor replied as he threw the pictures and the envelope to one side before walking over to the window, gripping tightly on his cane as he came to a halt.

"Where are these guys now?" Wilson asked as he himself looked through the pictures he picked up.

"They're in our custody." Bells answered and shifted his eyes back to the diagnostician to which he added, "All we need to have are statements from you, House. We already have the autopsy result but that isn't enough to press the charges firmer on them."

Silence.

"Wasn't the word 'raped' enough for you?" House asked as he turned to face the gentlemen again.

"We need witnesses for the crime," the inspector explained after clearing his throat.

"You have two other bastards in your hands. I'm pretty sure they saw what happened," the diagnostician irritably said.

"But they're suspects not victims," Bells said. "If you don't want to testify, I say we should now call on Dr. Cu…"

"NO!" House immediately yelled. "You think she could tell you what the fuck happened though she wasn't there?!"

"House…" his best friend tried to soothe him from a distance.

"No one's going to tell Cuddy anything as far as Rachel being raped is concerned," he said firmly before diverting his eyes away from Bells' green and Wilson's brown ones.

"She nearly took her life this morning," he silently added, "and I am not willing to see, or hear, or know it again."

For House the conversation is done. Lifting his eyes again, he began to walk to door, moving passed both gentlemen before pulling the door open and completely walking out of the room, Wilson following behind him knowing there's more his friend should say and more of him to know.

* * *

**Whew! Finally they got them... well not really, there's still one going around the street.**

**And Cuddy? Hmm, would you believe her that she fell asleep? In a BATHTUB.**

**And don't worry our best buds would be fine, trust me, they will.**

**Once again, thank you for reading and any words from you if highly appreciated. :D  
**


	16. Chapter 16

**Update #16. :)**

**A/N: First thank you for sticking up with this story and for all the words you're giving me. :) I love them all! Second, I would like to apologize for any invalid funeral and burial procedures I might have run into. I am no Jewish so I have no idea how they tend with the dead. With all clarity, I would like to say I have no intentions to disrespect the religion.**

**BTW, I hope you like lengthy chapters.**

**Well, Happy Reading! well, it's not really happy I admit. :)

* * *

**

Seeing House turned left, Wilson followed his best friend only to realize the diagnostician eased himself out the funeral homes' second floor porch that was overlooking half the city of Plainsboro.

"I get it, you don't want to talk about it but..." Wilson broke the silent while watching his best friend's back faced him.

"She slept in a bubble bath this morning," House cut him off without bothering to turn around as he leaned both his hands on the porch's railing.

He might not have seen what his best friend have done but the great doctor knew what Wilson did as the man behind him stayed silent. He was pretty sure the wonder boy's brows met in confusion, as doubt crept in if what he just heard was right.

"Wha... You mean Cuddy?"

"Unless we have another love child you wanted to talk about," House said before finally turning his heels and looking up to meet Wilson's gaze.

"I don't get it. Why would she..."

"She said she wasn't trying to kill herself," the diagnostician cut him off before landing his gaze on his side, "Sleep was all it was."

"And you bought it?" Wilson asked.

House shook his head once, "Not a chance."

As the silence between them deepened, the oncologist decided to walk to the space next to his best friend and stay there. They might have fought earlier but there's too much at stake right now to just let pride run their systems.

"There's no way I'm going to tell her what we know," House said with eyes in the direction of the doorway as his best friend laid his on the skyline in front of him.

"You should tell her," Wilson said gaining a look from the man beside him.

"I just said..."

"Today she dozed off in a bubble bath, tomorrow, who knows what she'll do. You didn't believe her and that meant something. You know, even if you don't admit it even to yourself, Cuddy's at the verge of losing," the oncologist began to lecture, "and holding things longer... won't do anything but make things worse."

House locked his eyes on him for awhile before looking away again, sighing as he does.

"What do I do?" he finally uttered after a few seconds of silence between them.

Shock to know House dropped his walls down, Wilson completely turned to face him.

"Burial's tomorrow. By next day, go and tell her."

"You think she could handle that?" there was still hesitation in the great doctor's voice.

"It's Cuddy, House. She'll get over it like what she does with every thing that's thrown at her."

"Those..." the head of the department of diagnostic medicine said, "were thrown but this," he looked up to meet his best friend's gaze, "this was slammed at her."

Wilson pursed his lips together, lightly twitching it as he does, and decided to say no more. He knew House was right, this was different, but he knew he also have his cards of ace on this matter.

"House," he called out when the diagnostician started walking towards the doorway that made the man eventually spun around, "slammed or thrown, it won't make any difference. Just tell her before somebody else does."

The six feet man nodded before completely walking back in.

***************

The sight that greeted him as he pushed the double door opened was exactly what House expected to see. Cuddy was still standing next to Rachel's casket as the people who went to pay a visit were lessened by almost half of the ones who first came in.

Standing still, he felt the urge to walk straight and be the one standing close to the woman he loves and wrap an arm around her as if shielding her from the pain that seemed to hold no plans of leaving her soon. Yes, he wanted to be that man but instead, he find him self limping to the last row of seats just a few step away from where he was.

With eyes still locked on the grieving mother, House sighed as Simon stayed seated as he divert his eyes from his coffee to the doctor who took the seat next to his.

"Thought you'll be there with her," the young man asked.

"I'll be. Not just now," House replied as he placed both his wrist on top of his cane.

Simon mouthed 'ah' and landed his gaze on his coffee again.

The silence that followed was making them comfortable but the longer they stayed speechless, the more gloomy and boring the place had become.

"So," the blonde boy started, "what did Bells said?"

Stunned to know that Simon knew his talk with the investigator, House turned his head with brows meeting each others end.

"How did you ---"

"Saw him walked in, saw him walked out," Rachel's biological father said.

A few seconds later, he decided to let his grey ones meet the doctor's eyes.

"You heard what we talked about?" House asked, wanting nothing more but to hear the boy say 'no.'

"Some of it," Simon replied while making a quick tilt of his head before taking a quick swig of his coffee.

The doctor straightened himself up without bothering to remove his eyes from the being beside him.

"Didn't your parents taught you it's bad to listen to other people's conversation?" he irritably asked as he rose up from his seat and was about to move away when Simon blabbed out again.

"Not if it concerns my daughter," he said, loud enough for the four people in front of them to glance back at him, even House himself. As soon as they turned their head in front again, they began whispering which annoyed the doctor even more.

Looking back at Simon, he muttered, "Get up and get out."

The blonde youngster couldn't help but to look to the side, obviously feeling stubborn to do so, but did what was told though. After placing the cup on his seat, he began walking a few steps before spinning around and looking back at the six feet man behind him still in doubt of what was about to come.

"Don't worry, I'll come with you," House said before watching Simon rolled his eyes but continued his way out.

***************

"Now what?" the boy asked as soon as they reached the funeral homes' hallway.

"You," House said as he pointed the tip of his cane at him, "will tell me what you know."

Simon scoffed as he walked in semi-circle path that made the older man drew his brows in curiosity again.

"I doubt you'll be laughing this way if you REALLY know what happened," House said as he watched the younger one turned his back from him.

He heard him sighed and then there were sobs. Ohgod, the boy really knew what happened. If Simon knows, it wouldn't be that long before Cuddy will and this thought alone once again feared House.

_'... tell her before somebody else does,'_ he heard Wilson say in his thoughts.

"I'm going to kill the bastard who did it to her," Simon broke the silence with his shaky voice.

"How did you know?" House asked before watching the blonde turned to face him.

"I heard you say it."

The doctor looked away as Simon dragged himself on the nearest wall and let himself fell on the floor with back resting on the concrete behind him. His eyes were red and the tears began falling. This was the first time he cried the news out. He held back earlier, but this time he finally let his sorrow and rage flow down. He really wanted to kill those men, he really, really wanted to.

"There's a reason why I didn't tell you yesterday when I found out," House said, trying to indirectly soothe him. His eyes landing on Simon, who had both his arms on top of his bended knees.

He waited for something - a grunt, a groan, a word - just to know he was heard but House didn't get any.

"And there's also a reason why I haven't tell Cuddy yet," the doctor added after a few seconds, "I suggest you do the same."

Simon rolled his hand to a balled fist with sobs being the only sound one could hear from him. If he'll attack, House would understand. The boy have every right to do so but as seconds turned to minutes, he faced no flying fist nor a black eye to tend to.

"Come on," the doctor said with an arm extended, an invitation to help Simon up, "get up. Let's go back inside."

He waited but again there was nothing in reply only same old sobs and clenched fists.

"Okay," House said after a sigh, "I'll be inside."

***************

No matter how Cuddy wanted to stop time, she knows she couldn't, in fact nobody could, so waiting for dawn to break to a full morning was all she could do.

To House's annoyance and her mother's disapproval, she didn't slept last night as she thought sleeping would lessen the time she could spend with Rachel. Last night was Rachel's "last day" and she won't surely spend it with sleeping as if things will be the same by next day.

She took an early bath but her breakfast stayed untouched.

As the size of the room became smaller as people came in, Cuddy knew this was it and the day even felt more real when the double doors opened and her grey eyes land on the burial pastor Wilson walked in with.

She saw the rabbi titled his head towards her friend but she didn't heard what he said. The oncologist mumbled 'sorry' before walking towards her with a forced smile tugging his lips.

"That's him?" Cuddy asked after a sniff.

Wilson nodded. "What did he say?" she asked as House appeared from the side door and began walking towards them.

"He said Rachel's casket shouldn't be open and corpse viewing isn't part of the Jewish custom," the oncologist said.

He was about to walked to the casket when he felt Cuddy's hand gently grabbed his arm and that caused him to turn his head to the side and look straight at the dean's grey eyes.

"James..." she silently protested as she felt another presence behind her.

Wilson sighed and dropped his head knowing there's nothing he can do. Customs are customs though they started off quite wrongly.

"I'm sorry," was all he could mutter before standing close to Rachel's opened casket.

Cuddy looked back and House looked down at her. He could see traces of tears that would soon be covered with another batch. He gave her a nod and she instantly yet slowly walked beside him.

As the oncologist close the lid of the casket, Cuddy couldn't help but to lean on the man beside him and in one motion, House wrapped an arm behind her and let his hand caress her opposite shoulder. Her body began making slight movement and his shirt was damping in one part.

He knew she was crying.

Pleased with Wilson's instant obedience, the rabbi managed to walk to where the three was. He met and greeted House and Cuddy as well as Julia, Carmen and Simon who just walked in. A few minutes later, he decided to start a simple Jewish burial ceremony.

As it moved closer to the end, the once strong dean began crying again and not even House's or her mother's soothing touches could calm her down. She could feel herself losing grip on everything but she wanted to be with Rachel until they laid her body to rest six feet under the ground.

The next event seemed to flash before Cuddy's eyes. All she remembered was Rachel's coffin being turned and some men settled it on an open cart and started pushing it gently out the room. The rabbi urged them to follow it which they did as well.

The ride to the nearest Jewish cemetery was like a death march for almost all of them. The weather was gloomy and the songs being played didn't help to cheer the mood either. As the car pulled to a stop, Cuddy's eyes were much more puffy and red than earlier. She had stopped crying but the moment her eyes land on a tent a few walks from where she was, she could feel small tears began running down her cheeks again.

She stayed seated on the passenger seat as her eyes eyed as Rachel's coffin being rolled to the spot where she'll be buried, with Simon following close behind. Maybe it was the car door opening or House's cell ringing that brought her back to her sense, she didn't know, she didn't care.

"I'm going to take this phone call first," the diagnostician said as he eased himself out of the car.

As soon as Cuddy nodded, it was Wilson who said, "Let's go," which the dean followed.

***************

"Yah," House uttered as the final burial ceremony went on far enough behind him.

"Got something you will surely like," Bells' voice sounded from the other line.

"Hookers can wait," the doctor said quickly and was ready to shut his phone when he heard the investigator's voice again.

"My boys got Radtke." His statement froze House as the feeling of getting in the car and smiting the bastard like a bug responsible for all of these began running in his system again.

If it weren't because of the cries Cuddy was making a few meters away, Bells would have thought the man had finally shut him off. There were also other sounds and sobs, and whoever and whichever they're from, he couldn't tell. The doctor obviously was speechless but he knew he was still there and it only dawned on him that he called on a bad time.

"Look," Bells started, "I'm sorry I didn't know..."

"Let's just get this thing over with," House said as he made a quick turn and watched Cuddy rubbed the top of Rachel's closed casket. As he turned his heels he saw Wilson was behind her as Julia and Carmen was at her left side and Simon taking the right.

"Over with? House this is just the start," Bells cleared that made House rolled his eyes in annoyance.

"I know but you see, I'm in a..." he stopped for some reason.

It was only then when he turned again to face the small crowd did he realized why and who caused him to drop his cell at once and urged his limpy leg to move as fast as it could.

The world seemed to blur around him but only two things were clear, the sight before him and the words coming out from Wilson, who was now slantly standing with Cuddy so close that even an ant couldn't pass through their bodies.

"House! Cuddy fainted!" the oncologist called as other men hurried to help him out.

* * *

**Put on your party hat and celebrate Radtke's downfall!**

**This is going to be the start of a long smiting of the bug, huh?**

**Reviews and suggestions are welcomed...**

**Thanks for reading! /hugs/  
**


	17. Chapter 17

**Update #17, oh yah! a sad one and there's somewhat a shocking and might be disturbing for some. I don't know what you think about that, so tell me about it. ;)**

**For now, Happy Reading!

* * *

**"Ohgod, shouldn't she be awake by now?" Carmen nervously asked to no one in particular as she looked down at her daughter who had been unconscious for almost half an hour and still counting.

The people who went with them had left, so did House's old and new team leaving the dean's family and closest friends alone as they waited for her to wake up in the limo where they settled her in.

Julia, who held her sister's head on her lap, knew that the small tears that were rolling down her mother's cheeks are no longer because of Rachel's burial. She knew, like everyone else, her mother was anxious since her youngest hadn't make any single motion since the minute she fainted.

"Mom, Lisa JUST fainted," she said, trying to soothe her mother, as she caressed Cuddy's forehead while House stayed close, checking the pulse.

"You're still getting some, right?" Carmen laid her eyes on him this time.

He nodded before easing himself up.

"But if she doesn't come out of it, we'll have to drive to the hospital," he said, also secretly fearing what he just said. In agreement to what his friend stated, Wilson nodded as he too looked down at Cuddy's sleeping state.

"Ohgod," Cuddy's mother hissed as her hand made its way on top of her mouth and she began to sob again.

"House!" a familiar voice made them spun their heads around toward the direction of the sound.

"Found your phone." It was Simon, holding the gadget up as he catches up his breathing.

The diagnostician took it, "Where'd you find this?"

"A few meters away from Rachel's grave. I happened to passed by it," the boy explained.

"Must be snagged out of your hand when you ran to us," Wilson interjected as House looked for any traces of broken pieces and damages.

"Thanks," the doctor said before flipping the phone open, "This has been ringing?"

"Twice when I was holding it but I didn't bother to look it up; my parents taught me I shouldn't listen to other people's conversation," Simon said remembering the words House told him last night. Now it's his turn to use it and that made the older man drew in a smirk.

As the youngster settled next to Cuddy's feet, the diagnostician began looking through the list of missed calls his phone had registered. There were five of it and all of them came from the same caller. As soon as something dawned on him he spun around and faced the small group again.

"I need to drive down to the police station," he declared that earned him all the stares of the people in front and beside him.

"You're leaving? How about..." Carmen asked only to be cut off at the middle of her sentence.

"Wilson will take care of her," he said before looking at his friend who stood straighter than before, "give her another ten minuets. If she doesn't wake up, go to the hospital and I'll meet you there as soon as I'm done with this."

The group agreed but just before House walked him self to the car, Simon stood up and called out after him.

"I want to come with you," the boy declared which House later approved upon.

"By the way," the diagnostician stopped and looked at Wilson again after walking a few steps while Simon opened the car door behind him.

"Don't forget to run pregnancy tests and when I say test-zzz, I meant run it twice or thrice," he said with a smug on his face.

"Wha... what? She can't be... You..." Carmen stammered as Julia's eyes widened. Wilson on the other hand wasn't surprise, in fact, he welcomed the idea.

"What, you don't think my boys can swim?" House said in a fake hurt voice before pulling the driver's door open and stepping in.

***************

Bells was seated on his big chair when his office door was pushed opened by an outside being. The buzzing sounds, small chatters and telephone rings sounded off as quickly as how it went on as House and Simon walked in.

The investigator lifted his head up and immediately shot them a welcoming smile as he stood up.

"Dr. House, Simon, please, have a seat," the officer said gesturing to the two vacant seats in front of his desk that was almost covered with folders and papers.

Taking the invitation as the cue, House and Simon did what was offered and shortly after, Bells did the same.

"I'm surprised you made it today," the investigator amusedly said, this time remembering its Rachel's Burial too well.

"Well, your calls seemed to be a code for 'come-down-here-fast-you-ass'. Who am I to write it off?"House remarked that made the man in front of them chuckle.

"Well, let's get this show on the road, shall we?" Bells once again invited that made both his visitors nod in agreement.

***************

Lifting his cup of coffee for the fourth time that afternoon, House watched and listened carefully as the investigator flashed slides in front of them. An LCD projector had been set up and the white wall at the back of the office was used as their projector screen.

"Hey," Simon leaned closer to him, voice barely above whisper, "how long 'til we go home?"

House looked at his watch and replied without bothering to look back at the boy beside him, "Too long to wait. Just enjoy the damn show."

"You call this a show?" Simon irritably asked as Bells continued to flash slides, "Those are the pictures of the bastards who killed Rachel."

This time, the doctor looked back but didn't say anything. His eyes did all the talking though as Simon felt himself slumping back on his chair and focusing his eyes back on the wall in front of them.

"Suspect number three," both of them heard as Bells changed the slide, "Rod Radtke. Often called by his last name, age 36. Been in prison for a year for assaulted murder but his brother bailed him out, probably thinking he'll change. Unfortunately he didn't. For the last five years, this man had been in the Most Wanted list. Been charged for almost all kinds of assault and your kid's rape wasn't the first. She's the fifth. Her murder wasn't either. He had a record of seven murders, again, for the last five years."

"Wow," House sarcastically said that made the man before them looked back at him, "boy, wasn't he busy."

Bells forced a smile as he walked closer to his clients with hands clasped together behind him. He eyed the floor beneath them before glancing up and meeting Simon's eyes when the boy asked.

"Can we see him?"

House's own blue eyes shot right up to him before diverting it to the investigator who was holding the same stunned face as he was.

"Uhm... yah... we'll get to that point but... I don't think, this afternoon is a good time to meet him," Bells explained.

Simon sarcastically scoffed before standing up as all kinds of emotion surged throughout his system. He turned his back for awhile before facing the man handling his daughter's case again. His eyes speaks how much he wanted to meet the son of a bitch who abused and killed Rachel and he wanted it right that moment more than going home and sleeping in.

Feeling the rage building up inside the boy's system, House rose up as well and said, "They waited nothing when they did the crime, we would feel bad if we won't return the favour."

"But Dr. House..." Bell tried to appeal only to be cut off by the doctor's words halfway.

"Relax, we don't do anything," he said as he hand his cane to the man standing before him, "take my cane if you don't believe me. Just let us see those S.O.B.s."

Eyeing the cane being handed to him, Bells couldn't help but to sigh and take the cane.

***************

Hearing the prison cell open, both House and Simon lifted their heads up after waiting for almost twenty minutes after Bells lead them to the department's visitation area. Radtke walked in wearing an insulting smile that the doctor wanted to rip off as soon as he could. Simon on the other hand, didn't bother to wait for Radtke to come to a halt and in one swift motion, he stood up and began kicking the crap out of the man who killed their little angel.

"You have to die you ass! I swear you have to die!" the boy yelled as he continuously land kicks on the man who was then shielding himself from any hit as the guard who was handling him tried to pull him out from the riot too.

"Hey! Hey! Stop it! Simon!" cried Bells as he tried to step in between and eventually pushing the youngster back.

"You promised to do no harm!" the investigator complained.

"No, I promised to do no harm, Simon didn't," House said as he eased himself up without bothering to break his sight on Radtke who had been wiping the blood out of his mouth as his other hand rub his aching stomach.

Bells couldn't help but to sigh and looked back to the guard who was holding their suspect.

"Let him take a seat," he ordered before looking forward again and ordering Simon to do the same.

"I'll stand," House said knowing Bells would order him to do so as soon as his eyes landed on him.

"Well, since we're all settled, let's do it over again," the investigator declared as he turned his back from the small crowd.

Taking this as a good opportunity, House let him self be owned by the rage inside him and began limping as fast as he could to where Radtke was seated and instantly kicked him right in front of his crotch that immediately made him bend his body in agony.

"Ohw" Simon sounded that made Bells faced them once more.

"House!" the investigator cried out as he too half run half walk to where the riot might begin again.

But the great doctor have already heavily land his rock hard fist on Radtke's face, sending the man off his chair and falling side flat on the floor. The action was executed so fast that the guard who was behind the suspect wasn't able to hold House back and Bells was left with nothing else to do but to pull the great doctor back.

Radtke tried to open his eyes only to see the diagnostician's eyes blazing with fire and enough daggers to make him land his head back on the floor.

***************

Opening the French door in Julia's home, House could tell a tea was being prepared somewhere in the house. A few minutes ago, he was about to turn left and make his way to the hospital when he got Wilson's call and ordered him to go to Julia's place instead, an order which he accepted with great relief.

"Hi," he gently greeted as soon as he entered the kitchen.

With a weak smile, Cuddy lifted her eyes from the tea and watched House as he made his way to her side.

"Look who's back from the dead," he teased before kissing the side of her head, "feeling better?" he added as soon as he pulled back.

"Maybe," she answered.

"You need to get upstairs and rest for now," House suggested as he held her wrist and gently pulled her arm, with his back now facing her.

"House..." she called out that made him spun around.

"Don't worry, I'll bring your tea later," he said.

"It's not about the tea," she paused and looked away for awhile before looking back at House again.

"Do you have something to tell me because... I have something to tell you..." she quietly said.

And there it was, his heart made its way to his throat and not even his gulping could push it back to where it should be.

* * *

**Oppsy... **

**Di-di-di-dung... Drum roll please...**

**Review button is waiting for you. :) Thanks for reading!**


	18. Chapter 18

**Anyone who follows me in twitter (11xy15) would know how writer's block affected me as I write this chapter down. Thank God I was able to wrapped things up and can now officially say, Chapter 18's up! :)**

**Happy Reading!

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**"House, is there?" Cuddy softly asked as he stood there motionless for a minute or two.

He could still feel her penetrating stares though he had turned his head to the side knowing too well that she could read the things that might be written in his eyes. His heart pounded his chest to the point it felt like he was having a heart attack as beads of cold sweat began forming on his forehead as soon as the woman in front of him removed her hand from his grasp.

Ohgod, she knows about the crime. Her latest action speaks of it and truth be known, it scared him.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you," House said in a low voice that his dry throat could manage. "I know I should have but..." he added as he made a quick glance at Cuddy before snatching his stares away again.

"Yes, you really should have. House, it's important to me and you know it," she cut him off in a shaky voice as tears began forming in her eyes.

"I know how important it is. To you, to me, to all of us," he snarked with a slight annoyance in his tone as he looked at her again, "but you should know I did it because things have been messed up lately and telling it to you as soon as I found it out will just make things more complicated."

He heard Cuddy scoff and her steps moving away from him.

"I should have been the first one to know it," she complained, "but it was Wilson whom you ran to."

"Things won't change whether it's Wilson or you I first talked with."

She sighed and looked at the countertop. Until now, she doesn't know how to react. Wilson was the one who told her so there's no way what she knew was a lie and she hated it that it was him who delivered the news, not House, not even her own eyes.

"If you'll throw me out because I hid it from you, I would completely understand," the diagnostician said already feeling the pain of parting with her again.

"I am not throwing you out," Cuddy clarified with eyes never leaving the glossy top.

"Rachel's death brought you at the brink of suicide attempt. I was scared..." House tried to justify, ignoring her words as he did.

With his own words squeezing themselves inside his head, he didn't hear Cuddy interjected his sentence, "Not after I know there's a possibility I might be carrying your baby."

Leaving him continuously saying, "and knowing Rachel's been raped is far more..."

It was the way Cuddy snapped her head to his direction that made him trail his words off. The way her eyes stare back at him in disbelief caused him to leave his mouth slightly open as his mind made a quick run down of their conversation.

"What?" she asked in disbelief yet fearing the man's answer.

Her question confirmed his instant fear that all this time, they weren't actually talking about the same thing and the tears that had fallen might not be because of the crime.

"Different," House uselessly added just before Cuddy began making small steps towards him.

Their eyes stayed locked with the other as both of them secretly fearing the worst that was bound to come. He couldn't take the way her eyes seemed to be looking lost again. He swallowed hard and landed his stares elsewhere not just on hers.

"I can explain," he finally said knowing it had been long enough since the woman stopped inches away from him.

"You knew?" and there it was, the first tone of emotion of being betrayed upon. Taking his silence as the cue of admission, the strong Dean of Medicine of Princeton-Plainsboro Teaching Hospital began to crack and sob again.

"But I don't," she said in between tears.

"I told you... I did it because I don't want to make things more complicated for you," he tried to explain, as his eyes meet her bowed head, only to be cut off when she shot her heads up once more.

"How dare you make decision that isn't about yourself?!" Cuddy burst.

"The decision I made wasn't just for me; and do you seriously think you can handle the news that instantly?" he threw back as he tried to keep his tone lower than hers.

Silence ate them up that allowed her sniffing sounds and their strong breathings conquer the portion of the house they're in.

"You know what, you're right," Cuddy calmly said as both shoulders heaved as she continues to cry, "things won't change either it's me or Wilson who you first talked with... because right now... things didn't really change. I still feel like crap but it's harder this time because I learned I was betrayed upon."

He swallowed hard hoping it'll somewhat ease the guilt he was feeling only to find out right after, it didn't. It was still there and even got worse as he eyed her limply land herself on the nearest bar stool. Face buried in her hands as both elbows met the countertop. Shoulders heaved stronger as her cries did the same and there's nothing more painful for him to see than what he was seeing right now.

***************

It was an hour after the event in the kitchen when the front door opened and both Cuddy's mother and sister walked in. They heard all the truth from House and both were furious about it. On Radtke, on Nick, on Bill but never was on House; they understood all the why-s why the doctor kept it and they knew they would have done the same back then.

Half an hour later, it was Wilson's turn to know what happened when he came to drop the result of the test his best friend had ordered him to do. In spite of the fact that he knew this was coming, the oncologist still couldn't help but to feel sorry for the loads both his friends have right now.

"How'd she take it?" Wilson asked as he stood at the side with fingers meeting the wheel of an old telephone a minute after he and House locked themselves in the study.

"With a cheery smile and shrieking voice. Stick around, champagne will be out later," the diagnostician sarcastically replied as he began reading the result his friend handed him earlier.

Shaking his head, the oncologist didn't bother to remark back allowing some minutes of silence take over the room.

Raising his arm with the paper at hand, House met his best friend's eyes as he made some small steps towards him.

"How many times did you run this test?" he asked.

"Thrice. Just as you ordered."

"How did you get Cuddy's blood when she's here?"

"She didn't tell you we went to the hospital?" House shook his head as he came to a stop. "Well, we did and a few minutes before Jeff took some blood samples, Cuddy woke up."

"So you told her about my orders?"

"It's her blood that was about to be drawn, she had the right to know what was that for."

House rolled her eyes before placing the result on a table. "You could have lied," he said.

Wilson forced a smile, "No thanks."

As his best friend's lips turned back to a thin line, the diagnostician slumped himself to the nearest chair before placing his forehead on the hook of his cane.

"You're still here," Wilson said after a brief pause between them, "Yet your limbs are still intact and thank God, you're still breathing. Cuddy's not out for a kill?"

"I told her, I'm ready to be kick out," House replied as he lifted his head and this time, let his chin met the hook, "she said she wasn't throwing me out. I'm thinking she wasn't herself when she said that or," then he looked at his friend, "she just wanted to keep me because of the thought of having a baby."

As Wilson saw the despair in his friend's eyes the door of the study swung opened and Julia's head peeped in that caught both men's attention.

"Greg," she called out, "Lisa wanted to see you."

The doctor nodded before Cuddy's sister pulled back and closed the door again.

Looking at his friend with the same sadness in his eyes, Wilson asked as House eased himself off his seat, "You're questioning what's running your relationship right now?"

"Guess I'm about to find out."

***************

Hearing the door knob turn open, Cuddy set aside the book she was holding before watching House as he got in. His eyes met hers only once as he walked in further until he landed himself on the space on the bed beside her legs.

"Hey," she greeted only to get a quick glance and a forced smile in return.

"You can throw me out now," he said after keeping his mouth shut for a second or two.

"House, I told you, I am not ---"

"It was negative," he cut her off that instantly silenced her.

Cuddy's eyes fell on the sheets instead on his face as the threat of tears surfaced once again. For god-knows-how-many-times, she failed once more. It wasn't like they were trying or were expecting but even if she wouldn't admit it out loud to anyone especially House, she knew at the back of her mind and in the deepest chamber of her heart, she was hoping.

Her silence, on the other hand, put a sting in the doctor's heart. He didn't need to hear her 'get-out' words, he sure didn't want to, so picking up himself, he stood with a heavy heart but was stopped to move a foot the moment Cuddy grabbed his wrist that made him spun around.

As she lifted her eyes to met his again, he was secretly surprised to see no tears only traces of which owning her face. Landing himself on the bed once more, he said, "You know you can cry if you want to."

She force-fake a smile before shaking her head no with eyes looking outside.

"I know I need to cry things out," she began, "but I don't want to."

He nodded, encouraging her to continue. "But I want and need you," she said as she looked back at him again.

Certainly not the words he was expecting.

He blankly stared back at her not knowing exactly what she meant. She just learned he betrayed her and they just learned she failed. _They_ failed. Now she's using WANT and NEED at the same sentence and both words were certainly pointing at him. For House, it doesn't fit yet there she was, holding his wrist, expressing her wishes that he'll stay.

WANT. NEED. He knows it wasn't the best of time but he can't help it when the mental images his confusion brings also brings some extra blood on his groin.

"You're... not mad at me?" he curiously asked, trying to push some scenarios at the back of his head.

Cuddy shook her head, "Because you're right. I couldn't handle it back then. I'm not saying right now 100% I can... but at least dealing with it one step at a time makes it a little lighter this time."

"So, I'm forgiven?" he asked as his mind come up with a repetitive sing song of 'make-up-sex, make-up-sex.'

She sweetly nodded and smiled before snuggling herself beside him, letting his arm snaked at her back and landing his hand on her shoulder.

"Have the suspects been arrested?" her voice suddenly dropped a couple of notch again but House failed to noticed as he was busy smelling her hair that even made his blood rush downward faster.

"Uh-huh," his auto-piloted mind and lips replied.

Feeling Cuddy untangled herself from his embrace, he looked at her as she blurted an unexpected request.

"I want to see them."

Causing his shaft to deflate as the memory of the faces of Radtke, Nick and Bill entered his mind.

* * *

**So they're somewhat back on track, aren't they?**

**As always, reviews are welcome and I thank you for the ones I continuously receive. =)**

**Thanks for reading!**


	19. Chapter 19

**As all of you have known, if ever you are following me on twitter and/or Facebook, I have announced last week that I am no longer writing this fic but then, there came an angel. Told me to continue what I started and then I did. Thanks Iane_Casey. :) *hugs***

**This chap had been bore out of my adrenalin rush over the KJ's interview and I checked it after the brilliant Huddy scenes from last night's episode. So I would understand if there are some errors. :) So without so much ado, here is the 19th chapter.

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**Two Days Later

Catching a slight movement from the corner of her eye, Cuddy turned her head to the right only to find House slouching lazily on the chair he was seated on. Normally he'll get a smack on his arm for acting such but right now all she wanted do was an eye roll before looking down at her cell phone that she had been using since they got in Bells' office two hours ago.

"What'd you got there?" his eyes landing on the dean's gadget as he asked.

"My blackberry," she flatly replied.

"I know what it is," House said with a 'duh' tone before easing himself to a better sitting position.

"Can't you hear your fingers shouting 'stop'? Because clearly, I can hear them from here," he added that earned him a stare from the woman beside him which was just taken back a few seconds later.

"I didn't know fingers could speak," she said with eyes on the phone screen before her.

"Oh you don't know what my fingers say about you Dr. Cuddy," his eyes wiggling playfully as he teased.

Cuddy looked at him and groaned in disgust that made the man smile before watching her look at the screen again.

By the time his eyes landed on the clock installed across the room, that was when House knew how long they've had been sitting on their chairs for nothing for that morning alone. He couldn't believe it. They've been stuck there for an hour and a half?! And to think they're still counting.

Bells met them up at 8, the time when they came in, but left thirty minutes later after getting an emergency phone conference which the investigator said will be wrapped up in twenty, thirty minutes tops. Unfortunately, the thirty was added with two more thirty-s.

The sound of Cuddy's voice took him away from his complaining thoughts and caused him to stare at her again.

"I'll be sending you a memo by the time I get home. I want you to print it out and post it to every department and every dept. head must know it." She paused as she listened to whoever was speaking at the other end. "Yes, I want all of them present by Wednesday during our meeting," she replied, "okay. Thank you."

"You're calling a meeting on Wednesday but you should be back not even next week or the week after. A bit too early for plotting a battle plan are we, Osama?" House analyzed and teased as Cuddy ended the call.

"Only you thinks I'm a terrorist House and no, I'm not coming back at the end of the month. I'm coming back this Wednesday," she informed without bothering to meet his stares.

"Someone has to say 'no' to your insane requests and watch out for you," she reluctantly added as his silence told her he didn't like the idea.

"And what? Tied my hands and clamp my feet together while a metal ball's attached to it?" he asked, looking forward this time.

"If that's what you want, we can surely do it."

"Now that's just mean."

He heard her chuckled before letting themselves fall to a deafening silence again.

"You know if you wanted to watch me over, you could move in with me," he offered that made Cuddy's head snap fast in his direction.

"What?" she asked, not because she didn't understand what she heard but because she didn't believe the words the man beside her uttered.

"Do you want to move in with me?" the diagnostician repeated as his blue eyes met her grey ones.

Her mouth fell slightly open as she saw the sincerity radiating from the pair before her. She had never officially moved in with anyone before and that fact drove her mind blank on how and what to answer.

She felt pressured as the man wearing a t-shirt with a formal jacket on top waited for her to say something. 'Yes' or 'No', it doesn't seem to matter when the door finally flew open and Bells' secretary came in leaving her final answer as if its a TV show's season finale nerve-racking cliff hanger.

***************

"I'm very sorry for the inconvenience of wasting your time. I just couldn't believe how this case progresses for the last 72 hours," Bells declared as he placed a stack of folders on the conference table before him.

"Did your mouth dropped for two hours in amazement that you forgot we're in your office?" the diagnostician asked in return.

"House!" Cuddy exclaimed as her sharp eyes landed on him.

"What? He let us wait for two hours. That's way too much."

"If you don't shut up, I'll be happy to demonstrate what too much means for me," the dean threatened in gritted teeth.

He wasn't afraid of the threat that was presented but he figured backing down from his jackass self would make the update reporting faster and finally allowing them to leave the police department faster too.

"She's... You know... love playing the demonatrix part," he said with his finger pointing at Cuddy who in return rolled her eyes.

"I'm so sorry for that..." the woman pleaded to the investigator before her.

"No, it's okay Dr. Cuddy, nothing to worry about," Bells reassured, giving a simple smile in return as his hand open the first folder on top of the stack in front of him.

"Thank you. Uhm, when will I see the suspects?" the dean asked.

The investigator forced a smile and said, "I'm afraid you won't be seeing them Dr. Cuddy."

"We've been here since eight in the morning for that," the woman complained.

"See? Told you she loves playing the dominatrix part. Prepare to be dominated," House snarked from the side.

"One," Cuddy threatened as soon as her eyes met his blue ones. She waited for his smile to fade before looking back at the inspector in front of her again.

"So we've just been seating in your office for the last two hours for nothing?" she asked in disbelief.

"Well, I was getting on that Dr. Cuddy," Bells began to explain as he handed the opened folder to woman who handled and read it immediately.

"These are all... sworn statements..." she said, flipping the page from one to next.

"Yes they are..." confirmed the man in uniform as he watched House read along with Cuddy as well.

"But these aren't House's and Simon's," the woman observed.

"Ms. Jo Clarkson?" the diagnostician asked as he held her hand to keep it from flipping the next page as his eyes landed on the name of the complainant.

"That's right," Bells nodded in agreement, "and Ms. Clarkson isn't just the only one you two should give a call as soon as you arrive home." As House and Cuddy lifted their heads up to look at him, he lined the rest of the folders like cards in front of them. "And I'm pretty much sure you'll be receiving some too," the man added.

"Wait, what is this all about?" Cuddy voiced out, "What does Clarkson something to do with our case?"

"Because Jo Clarkson, and these sworn statements from other six people, nailed Radtke and his gang," Bells declared.

"Nailed, like..." the woman asked with brows furrowed in confusion.

"Sentenced to death?" House asked, adding Cuddy's question.

"No, god no," Bells clarified, "although, we have lifetime imprisonment," and he finished it with a smile.

He watched as the couple in front of him froze in their seats. He could tell how both of them are in great disbelief until a small laughter escaped the woman's lips as things began landing themselves inside her head. She could feel House looking at her from his seat as tears began owning her eyes for the first time that day.

"Please tell me what you just said wasn't a joke," she said in between her sniffles.

"No, it's not Dr. Cuddy," Bells confirmed with another smile that caused the dean to let her flood gates go down and so the waterworks of her lovely eyes began.

"Ohgod, thank you, thank you," was all her mind and lips could come up with as House positioned himself closer to her this time. A few seconds after her head met his chest, he could feel a small part of his shirt being soaked lightly from the tears that were coming from the woman who he protectively circled an arm with. He didn't let her go until he felt her pulled away.

"I just... have to go... to the bathroom," she said, getting a nod of approval to go in return.

"How did this..." he began to asked as soon as he heard the door close again.

"When my gang was looking for Radtke, they stumbled upon some of his victims. They've been looking for him too and agreed to contact us as soon as they see him around the city. Well, we did caught him. There are charges needed to be filed against him and the victims immediately complied and filed in," Bells told him before getting up and gathering the folders he laid out earlier.

"And what? He was guilty for all the crimes you told me and Simon? Just like that? No trials? No lawyers coming in?"

"Well not all I would say. Some of the victims didn't went out from their holes. Given all these sworn statements plus the direct admission of the crimes by Radtke and his gang, the judge waited for nothing else and concluded his decision just this morning."

"Do I... Do I need to come out of my hole?" he hesitantly asked that made Bells stop and look at him.

"It would be better if you do." House nodded as the door was pushed open again.

"Thank you," the doctor said as soon as Cuddy reached the empty space beside her chair. He didn't let her sit back again by standing beside her, knowing they'll be calling it a day soon enough anyway. Thank you's and handshakes were exchanged before the couple and the inspector parted ways.

***************

The drive back home was silent in some way though small talks about the case had been tackled. Both held back some words they wanted to say to the other as the memory of the diagnostician's question once again entered their being.

"Hey," House's voice cracked the peaceful afternoon in Cuddy's ears.

She waited for him at the doorway as he slowly climbed on Julia's four step porch.

His breathing was labored as he finally stood face to face with her. Probably from the toll the walk had on him or from the nervousness he felt inside... at the end, he thought it might as well just be both.

"You don't have to answer right now," he said as he directly looked into her grey eyes.

"You're making it sound like it's a proposal," she replied getting a smile in return.

"Isn't it? Not just for marriage though."

She kept silent before looking at her hand that she was about to place on his broad chest before her.

"I... I want to make it clear that I am not saying 'no' to it," she started with the best sincere tone she have, " I just don't want to make a move just because I feel lonely or you are lonely," then she looked up only to find his blues were already waiting for her.

"I don't think I still need to say that my apartment's door is always open for you," House said with a glint in his eyes.

Cuddy smiled and shook her head, "No, you don't."

Letting himself lost in her eyes, House leaned in forward and gently gave her a quick peck on her lips. That was the plan until their closed eyes remained shut as Cuddy's hand held his nape to keep his head down. As he tilted his head to the right, his tongue parted her lips and finally met hers. Both fought for a gentle and quick domination in the mouth of the other only to no avail. They want this. They need this but there's also a need to stop and pull back.

So reluctantly, they did though foreheads still touch the other.

As House opened his eyes, a pair of familiar grey eyes stared back at him that made him tugged in a smile.

"One step at a time?" she asked in calm whisper.

He smiled and repeated, "One step at a time."

* * *

**Yah, the case is officially close. I said the case ha, not the story. Hehe**

**I know it's pretty fast and might even be unrealistic but I don't have the faintest idea about court hearings so I just did it that way.**

**Thanks for the previous reviews and I would love to hear what you think about this too. :)**

**Thank you for reading and once again, thank you Iane_Casey =)  
**


	20. Chapter 20

**Ha, at last, I can't believe I made it. Whew! Thanks for the reviews and guys, about this chapter, I fear something. Read on to find out.**

**Happy Reading!

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**

As their lips stayed locked with the other for the third time that afternoon neither House nor Cuddy cared with the idea of being out in the porch of her sister's home and the possibility of having someone from the household or the neighborhood seeing them.

It might be just a kiss but the bliss it ensued throughout their systems was something they have been craving to feel for the last few days. It was, after all, what they needed to feel from each other and having it right now was something they wanted to last even for at least a few minutes more.

But Cuddy knew House too well that the moment she felt his tongue pulled back from her mouth and grazed her lips instead; she knew it was time to do the same. When she popped her eyes open, his ocean blues were already staring back at her.

He was motionless and his lips weren't even moving but still he has the ability to melt her to the core. People are right; sometimes one doesn't have to speak to make you feel they're there because the man before her was proving them right.

"Stop grinning like idiot or I'll take you right here, Dr. Cuddy," she heard him say only to realized she really was grinning like idiot but with a glint in her eyes.

"Like you could," she challenged, rolling her eyes at him before she look down at her purse as her hand dive to find the key.

"You really want to bet on that?" he asked as his hand slowly crept to her behind.

"House," she warned, shooting her head up again momentarily before eyeing the knob she was ready to turn open.

The click of the knob sounded as if a cue for him to say, "Well, got to go."

"You really don't want to stay?" she asked, looking up at him again but he wasn't able to do the same.

"Hey," this time, she earned his attention back at her, "thank you."

"You're welcome," he replied barely above whisper. He watched as Cuddy tip toed to at least be a little high to be of level of him before feeling her lips gently meet his.

"I'll see you at work tomorrow?" he asked.

"Yah. Don't be late," she answered before watching him ride his bike and drive it north until it faded out in the horizon.

4:59.

5:00 and off goes the clock which Cuddy hurriedly turned off. It was set to alarm like before but today, it didn't actually play the part it was intended to do. The owner had already been up for the last thirty minutes with eyes blankly scanning the room for nothing specific.

For others, the dawn was like any other day - chilly, relaxing, silent – but for her, it was something she has to learn to appreciate again.

The dawn she had gotten used to for the past four years always starts with a cry from the baby monitor. A few months later, the cries became incoherent babblings then the babblings turned to be the sweet melody of 'good morning, mommy' and the baby she used to look down in a crib was the same little girl speaking with the prettiest smile she could give.

This isn't her dawn. She was however forced into this long and slow torture and like it or not, she has to deal with the pain of waking up seeing no smiles and greetings from the child she called her own.

When will this end? That she doesn't know. Forgetting what happened was something she knew she could never do but accepting it as it was, is the only thing she was looking forward to.

"Mom," Cuddy softly called out a few minutes after as she entered the dim kitchen that was only illuminated by chosen sconces.

Hearing her youngest daughter's voice, Carmen turned and furrowed her brows in confusion.

"It's... 5: 27, why are you up so early?" the dean asked as she looked at the time at the wall clock before making her way in front of her mother, leaning on the counter with her lower back touching the edge.

"Shouldn't I be the one asking you that question?" the older woman threw back as she turned to grabbed two eggs from the fridge beside her only to get nothing in return from her daughter.

In fact, if it weren't for the sound of the kettle whistling, the room will be eaten by a deafening silent which both of them knew encloses a meaning.

"Coffee or tea?" Carmen asked a few seconds later.

"I'll take the tea," the younger version of her replied. "You weren't here when I got home. Didn't even hear you came in," Cuddy stated, eyeing her mother poured her drink to a cup.

"Julia told me not to wake you up anymore when we got home," was the answer she got before they fell on a brief silent again as her mother walk towards her with a filled cup in her hand.

"Thanks," she muttered as soon as her drink landed in front of her.

"So, any progress on the case?" Carmen asked, grabbing the clean dish towel beside her and began wiping the dried dishes on the tray, separating the ones she wiped from the ones that aren't yet touched.

"It was a big progress mom," Cuddy shared, "you wouldn't believe how the case ended."

"Ended?" her mother turned to look at her.

"What do you mean..." added the older one, more eager to know more this time as the smile she saw on her daughter didn't fade as fast as her smiles usually do.

"Turns out the gang who broke in my house last time have piles of report. Victims showed up and pressed him more than what the judge needed. They're heading for a lifetime imprisonment." The dean's smile can never be wiped out now. She was happy. She was glowing.

"Ohgod Lisa, I'm so happy for you," Carmen admitted as her arms pulled her daughter for a warm embrace, "I really am."

"Thanks mom," Cuddy said before feeling her mother pulling back. "Rachel's death had somehow been close in peace," she silently added as soon as the identical pair of grey eyes landed back at her.

"I knew it would be," she heard the woman in front of her say, "and, it'll put me at peace even if we're more than twenty miles away from each other."

"Mom, twenty miles is too much," Cuddy said, "the only thing that separate us from this day onward is a wall between my room and yours."

Carmen smiled sweetly but said nothing for awhile. "I wish it's really like that, Lise," she confessed, finding her eyes landing on the dish cloth again rather than on her daughter's eyes.

"Mom..."

"But it won't be," she cut her off before letting the silence drop on them once more.

"What are you talking about? It's not like you're..." Cuddy suddenly fell silent as a realization hit her. It was Carmen's cue to look up yet still finding no words to explain her sudden departure.

"You're leaving?" the dean asked, the tone of disbelief was there. And it was a nod that confirmed everything, a nod that left both women felt as if a lump was stuck in their throats as they tried to fight back the threatening tears that were beginning to swell their lids around their eyes.

"Honey," Carmen tried to reach out as she watched her daughter swallowed hard and wiped the first batch of tears that began to appear to keep them from running further down, "this was all a sudden decision."

"When are you leaving?" Cuddy asked, looking at the counter edge than her mother.

"10 this morning," the woman informed, hearing nothing in return once more.

"'Kay," she heard her daughter say as soon as the cup was laid on the counter after a quick swig of coffee. Yet the words she spoken didn't sound as how 'okay' should have been delivered. It was shaky and forced.

As Cuddy stood up from the stool she was seated on, eye contact with her mother was never there. She might have fake the 'okay' part but she knew her eyes would show how 'not okay' it really was.

Her journey on moving on hasn't started, yet here she was already feeling defeated.

At mid morning, House pulled the car in a nearby park where he used to pass his time with. He went in a little late earlier that day, just five minutes though, only to be told by the dean's secretary that no one will be coming through the familiar brown double doors he loved to push hard as often as he could.

And now, after using his phone to search for Cuddy via GPS, he found himself frozen beside his car eyeing the woman he knew was her even with her back facing him from afar.

It took him a few more minutes before signalling his feet to begin moving forward as soon as the courage to walk settles in him.

Comforting. That's the first thing he knew he isn't good at yet he can't just throw his red ball against the wall of his office and let the woman of his life slave herself with sadness all day.

Taking the vacant space on the picnic table beside her, House quietly sat down and joined her eyes that had been eyeing the ducks that seemed to be having fun being afloat on the pond before them.

"Wouldn't it be cool if people could also be cheered up by just dropping their heads in a pond like how these ducks do?" Cuddy flatly said as her eyes stayed glue on the animals who were filling the air with their quacks.

"It seemed... so easy," she added short after.

House nodded as if she'll see him do so and said, "And God bless the makers of the neck frame a lot of us will use before we even hit the age of five."

She said nothing in approval or the other before hearing herself speak again, "I would rather have a neck brace if it means a single bend to a pail of water would make me happy."

His eyes darted towards her as soon as his peripheral vision saw her moved her head and her eyes now meeting his. The glint he saw yesterday on Julia's porch weren't there anymore but the tears he knew he saw three to four days ago were there though.

"Come here," he offered which the lady beside him slowly obeyed.

He pulled her close. His arm engulfing her back as he let her treats his shoulder as her pillow. It was a vomit – inducing scene he knew he hated to do even way back during his high school years but if this simple contact makes the woman beside him feel a little better, he's more than willing then to be photographed.

Her body relaxes only to stiffen and heaved a few seconds later. The sound coming out from her drowned the quacking sounds the ducks were making and to his surprise, the small circles he drew on her opposite shoulder made the sound fading a few minutes after.

"My mom's coming back to Michigan with Julia this morning," Cuddy said after a sniff without releasing herself from his embrace. "Mark wanted Julia to be there by five so he can leave their daughter to her before he leaves for Paris tonight," she added.

House kept silent. He knew there's something more he needs to know.

"I'm alone," he heard her say before feeling her body moving away from his.

"Is that an invitation for a sleep over in your sister's place?" he asked, trying to lighten the mood by throwing in a joke. Which obviously didn't help when she said nothing as she eyed the ducks again.

"Hey, you know you're not alone. You don't have to do this alone," he sincerely said watching one side of her face as he speaks.

"You know I'm here," his tone dropping a couple of notches than earlier.

Cuddy knew he's right. He's willing to be there. In fact, he already was.

But what if he was able to reach the ultimate 'there' and she was still left 'here.' Rachel wasn't his child and it wasn't his family who left this morning. He might be willing to stand beside her in times like this but he will never feel the same incompleteness she has inside. Moving on for him will be as easy as how he changes his mind in changing channels on TV. Moving on for her was and will be a different story.

"You know I can call Wilson to help us move your things from your sister's place to mine," House offered before the silent between them dug itself deeper.

She turned her head and met his eyes.

"Don't," she said.

"Don't... call Wilson and you'll be staying in your sister's place or you don't want to stay in my place?" he asked wanting to know which.

"Neither," she said, stopping the wheels in his head that would supply him a probable reason on why she said 'don't.

"I am not going to stay in Julia's place and I am not moving in with you," the woman informed.

"You can't go back on your house either," House reminded her.

"Never plan to," she stood up, feeling the man's stare on her face as he did the same.

"Cu..." he started to speak only to be cut off a few syllables later.

"I already called Joel to tear the house down as soon as the police is done with everything they needed. I'm selling the lot too," she informed and watched as House's mouth slightly fell on her admission. He knew how much her house and even the lot itself meant for her. She bought it for Christmas during her first year of being a certified doctor.

"Found a new place?" he asked.

She nodded, closing her eyes momentarily before eyeing the grass beneath them, and said, "In Malibu."

His heart dropped as he felt his blood drained his face. In Malibu? Has this woman gone insane? The place she bought was at the other end of the country.

"Rachel left you, you're mother, your sister left you," he said, delivering it harsher than he wanted it to be, "now you're leaving me?"

Getting her attention back, he added, "Cuddy, I just said I'll be with you through this."

"You don't have to."

"I want to," he firmly and instantly said before they fell to another hole of silence.

"I have to move on alone, House. It's just how things supposed to be. I was the one who lost someone, not you," she added already seeing the hurt surfacing on the man before her.

"You could," he stopped and gulped the heavy feeling he had in his throat, " you could still stay here if being alone is what you wanted. 50 meters away from you, I'll take it," he bargained against his will.

Cuddy shook her head. "Staying here will just kill me." She lifted her hand and caressed one side of his stubbled cheek.

"I'm... I'm sorry," she said feeling the pit in her stomach as she speaks especially when the diagnostician returned nothing, not even a stare back.

She retreated her hand and began walking towards her car only to feel him following behind her but not that close. She didn't turn back and she didn't look to the side before entering her car, all she did was walk, ride and drive away.

* * *

**Yah, she wanted it that way. He wanted it this way. Complicated huh?**

**I want to hear what you think about this. :)) Sorry if the chapter and the story is getting lame. :(**

**Well, thanks for reading! :)  
**


	21. Chapter 21

**Presenting the fifth revision of the 21st chapter... Yah, I revived it five times but I ended up liking this chapter than the first one I did. Thanks to Iane_Casey for making me realize it's better to take one step at a time. :)) I also thank those who give this story a review last time and for those who willingly look for updates. Don't worry guys, I am working things out with my brain.**

**Now with not so much ado, happy reading!**

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From where he was standing, Wilson had the clear view of what he wanted to see. His office balcony offered more than what he expected. He never thought being on the fourth floor of the hospital would still give him the perfect view of the hospital's parking lot in spite of the trees that seemed to miss their shaving creams and razors for the last two weeks.

This wasn't how he imagined this day will play out. Disappointed, his eyes began to trace the gothic design of the tiles beneath him. There's no reason to be looking at the horizon knowing there's nothing more to be hoped for. Things have already been said and done and after the call he received from a friend of his a few minutes ago, he knew the decision of fate might never change.

A sound of an engine being turned off caused him to lift his head up. Bingo, just the right car he'd been waiting to see since he walked in that morning.

Shouldn't the driver supposed to be walking out now? But no, the person who bears the name on the signage before the black Lexus was still inside. If he doesn't know any better, he would have thought the driver had passed out from the absence of motion he could see.

But he doesn't have to wait any longer as the person still strapped with seat belt lifted her arm up until palm meets face. The creature moved but, for James Wilson, it wasn't just plain movement done by someone.

Far from him, away from his comforting arms, was Lisa Cuddy... crying her heart out.

* * *

The door leading to the office of the head of the board member was pulled open that jolted both Wilson and the secretary on their seats. Unlike them, Cuddy and Brits weren't surprise to see the oncologist to be there that as soon as the dean turned to face him again, the head of Department of Psychology knew exactly what he needed to say and do.

"I'll keep you updated," Brits said.

"Thank you," Cuddy gratefully returned before watching the man nod and walk back in his office.

"Hey," she heard her friend gently say as she let her head stayed sideway.

There's no reason to lie or hide her decision. Knowing Wilson, she's certain House already called him but she could still feel the hesitation in her veins to look back at the awaiting man before her.

"Hi," she greeted as she find herself doing what she needed to do, that was to face him.

"I heard," he said watching the forced smile on her lips fading.

"Yah," she nodded in agreement.

With her eyes momentary landing on the working secretary a few steps away from their side, Wilson got the cue. Extending one arm, he let the woman lead their way out of the office and went beside her by the time they reached the almost empty hallway.

"Conrad is the most likely candidate to replace my position as your new dean," she said as they continued to move towards the open end of the wing.

God, if only he could tell her to stop mid-sentence he would have. Hearing the decision about administration replacement only made the situation feels real. Not that it isn't but for Wilson, inwardly denying that everything was happening was the last rope he was grasping on.

"He's off to start on Monday," she added wanting nothing else but to end this conversation at once.

"Cuddy," the oncologist finally called out, his hand reaching for her arm causing her to come to a halt.

"The rest of the board will have an emergency meeting at three this afternoon," she informed before the man had the chance to open his mouth to speak. He wasn't surprise on her actions but he didn't expect it either. He knew Cuddy wanted to avoid this conversation and she started it by speaking up first as soon as her eyes met his.

"Are you sure about this?" the oncologist asked after a few seconds of silence as she looked at something beneath them.

To his worry, she shook her head once and admitted, "No but I know this is what I'm supposed to do. When..." she gulped, fluttering her eyes closed before lifting her heads up to find her hazel eyes staring back at her, "when Amber died, you did the same thing. You moved out of the city and even House could tell, it did something good for you. It's just my turn to take the card."

He couldn't protest, he knows she's right.

"House called me..." he informed as soon as her eyes landed on the floor again.

"I know," she said.

"I take it he wasn't on your side on this."

"No, he isn't," she confirmed feeling the guilt for being selfish slowly creeping in again.

"Hey," her friend's voice and touch that landed on her shoulder pulled her from her thoughts.

"If you think living on Mars would make things better not just for you, then do it," he said with a smile that caused Cuddy to make her own in spite of the obvious tears that began to glisten her grey eyes.

"It's just that..." she began to say only to be cut off mid-way.

"Sshh, don't drown yourself that way," the oncologist said pulling her for a hug that she needed since she left the park earlier that day. At first, he couldn't help but to feel conscious of who might and what might those people think if they saw him holding the dean close as this but the moment he felt her shake, his worry for her grew bigger than what he had for other people's opinion.

"I feel so selfish," she confessed, her voice cracking, with head buried on the man's chest who had his arms around her back.

"I told you, if you think this is the right thing to do, do it," he comforted, tapping her back at the same time.

His words were meant to give her strength but Cuddy found herself losing control of her self as the waterworks in her eyes grew heavier as she heaved on. Her knees were shaky as her mind thought twice once again about her decision.

What if she's wrong about the move she's about to make? Are the things she gave up worth it?

The words of retreat were already seating on the tip of her tongue but she couldn't even open her mouth to speak. The pain of leaving Plainsboro and all the things and all the people living here numbed her throat. She'll be missing a lot of things, but at least for now, Wilson promised to hold the greatest of all her greatest.

"Take your flight," he said, "I'll look after House for you."

* * *

He was hurting.

He never told anyone about it but the traces of suppressed tears under his eyelids proved how he forced to treat the night like nothing happened.

And there's nothing more he thought would help him negate the pain than Jack Daniels. Indeed it was helping. Each swig he takes sent fire down his throat and each gulp momentary black his mind out from the pain he was feeling.

Why didn't Stacy made him feel this way? Why didn't she shot daggers straight to his heart with her words of good-bye? He would have appreciate it if she did because at least from that he would have known how to handle this kind of pain that seemed to be squeezing his heart tight.

But she didn't. True, she said good-bye but it didn't hurt like how he was feeling right now.

'Damn House,' he thought as he pressed the glass's rim to his lips, 'she's just a woman.'

"Just a woman," he repeated after a nod as soon as the liquid left his throat.

But before the other part of his brain kill the other for pointing such, a knock brought him out from his drunken thoughts.

For the first three thuds he didn't bother to ease up, hoping whoever was the unwanted visitor would get his cue that he wanted to talk to no one for the night. The knock went on though and with scowl on his face, he was left with no choice but to stumble on his couch and side table on his way to door in his present state.

"I came by to invite you for drink," Wilson said as soon as the green door before him was pulled open, "the invitation's kind of useless now."

House rolled his eyes in return. "So just leave. I'm not done celebrating," he said as he watched his friend's brow arched in confusion.

He was deflecting and the man whose eyes were now eyeing something on his left arm knew it. Busted, he gulped and looked away.

"You cut yourself," Wilson pointed out in a flat tone with eyes unable to meet his friend's blue ones.

"And you're worried," the diagnostician stated, feeling as if they're playing the state-the-obvious contest.

Knowing he'll get nothing in return, House sighed after a brief pause between them. Wilson won't leave him like this so he stepped aside and pulled the door wider.

"Come in," he softly said before watching his friend did as what he was invited to do.

* * *

**Did I overdo the emo-state House? Oppsy... **

**Anyway for the whole chapter, I hope you like what happened.**

**Thanks for reading! Reviews will be warmly welcomed. :)  
**


	22. Chapter 22

**After 48 years, here's the 22nd chapter of Can't You Stay Longer. Thank you for the words and alerts you unselfishly give. I love them all! :))**

**WARNING: The chapter you will be reading is highly boring and was made out of severe writer's block. So, prepare to yawn and give up along the way.

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**

Placing the box of cheerios on the kitchen island, Wilson looked over at his friend who was pouring himself another round of scotch in the living room.

"Why do you have a box of cheerios in the house?" he asked.

"Because I eat them," House replied in a 'duh' tone, lifting his gaze momentarily at his friend before eyeing the bottle he was about to put a lid on.

Wilson slightly nodded his head and said, "Just like what you're right doing now," motioning to a bowl of coloured circles on the table before watching the diagnostician met his eyes again.

"I let you in because you want to clean my wound, now that you did, you may go instead of talking to me about the mysterious appearance of cheerios in my cabinet," the diagnostician flatly said just he was about to let the rim of the glass touch his lips for a swig.

"And by the way, it's no mystery," he added as soon as the feeling of hot scotch drained in his throat.

Wilson sighed as he placed both hands in his pockets. "It's Rachel's isn't it? The cheerios; now that she's gone, there's no point to be keeping..."

"Yes!" House roared as he stood in one motion, "those damn cheerios were bought for her! What difference would it make if you talk about it, if I eat all of them or if I put them to the trash? You don't have to tell me she's gone because I know she's gone! If you came here to tell me her mother's gone, don't bother, I already know!" He paused. "I can already feel."

For a minute, the oncologist stood there in complete silence. He wasn't shock because he knew that was coming. Somewhere Gregory House will break and it happens he was the one who pushed the button and was the only one who saw the burst of saddened emotion.

As his friend drew near, the diagnostician looked away.

"Just go," he said in a much softer tone.

And with that, Wilson gave his shoulder two taps before the sound of the closing door echoed around the house.

* * *

With a smile, a woman in her mid 40's made her way out of her kitchen towards her floral-themed living room in her Malibu house where her most-wanted visitor was. It was nine in the morning and offering her guest with a cup of tea was something she felt was the right thing to do.

"Here you go," Claire said as she placed the tray she was holding on the coffee table in front of Lisa Cuddy, who was returning her smiles with her own.

"Thank you," the dean uttered as Claire sat back on the opposite chair before her.

"So you're really planning to stay here in Malibu?" the woman began.

"For two to three months, I think it's a yes and from that I'll see where I can go from there," Cuddy returned just as she was about to drink a sip of her tea.

For a moment, Claire studied her friend's profile with worry in her eyes. She could feel the need of peace and tranquillity this woman in front of her was searching.

"I'm sorry about Rachel's death," she sincerely whispered.

Cuddy nodded, accepting the words of condolence, but couldn't brought herself up to say something.

"You know you can stay here in California for good," Claire added, "if, you know, going back to Jersey will bring the pain back."

"I don't think the pain will even go away," the brunette shared.

"I know," her friend agreed before they fell to a moment of deep silence as tears began appearing in the dean's eyes, one after another.

"Sorry, tear gates are betraying me right now," Cuddy suddenly said as soon as a forced yet soft laughter escaped her lips as her fingers wiped the buds of water in her eyes.

Claire nodded as she handed her friend some tissues and said, "Trust me, my floodgates did the same thing when I lost my son. It was a nightmare that tortured me for months, even years. I'm not even sure if I really am over his death. But his lost made me stronger than I was before but you know what they say, healing isn't a one night job. It takes a lot of things for you to get over with the pain; and the worst part, none of the books about moving on will directly show you how it's done. Even if it does, it's all up to you to do it."

"You're a strong woman, Lisa, and you know it," she added as soon as a small smile crept on the dean's lips. "Take this decision of being here in California as your first step. If this still bores you, I have a friend who recently opened a flower shop in downtown Malibu, if you want, you can work there part time to take your mind off from Rachel's death. Sort of, self-therapy I guess."

"I didn't know you still remember how I love flowers," Cuddy pointed out which was returned with a nod from the woman before her.

"Can I?" Claire asked with a smile, "the grin and the blush you had when we were in college when Gregory House gave you a bouquet, even if they're stolen, are vividly on my mind, girl."

With that, and for the first time that day, Cuddy couldn't help but to let out a genuine laugh that was shortly followed by her friend's.

"See? Even until today, mygod, Greg House never fails to make you blush," the woman in her 40's remarked, still oblivious of who the man she was talking about turned out to be in her friend's life.

"You know what? I think I'll give that flower shop thing a try," the dean decided to which Claire nodded about.

* * *

Meanwhile, back in Plainsboro, the hospital's auditorium door was pushed open before a number of people began making their way out after an hour long ceremony of meeting their new Dean of Medicine, Clark Conrad. The ducklings were the first one to come out than their boss who made it out, with Wilson beside him, when there's only a few heads struggling on the doorway.

"You really think Conrad's a stinkypants that's why you didn't vote for him?" the oncologist asked as they crossed the lobby of the first floor.

"Isn't the reason enough for you?" House asked.

"Quit being a twelve year old. You know the man can do the job."

"I know; that's why I don't like him," the diagnostician admitted as he entered the vacant elevator before turning to his friend who stayed on the firm ground and refused to ride with him.

"You don't like him because if he can really do the job, there's a high chance no one in the hospital will like Cuddy back anymore," Wilson figured out.

"Oh aren't you clever?" House remarked just as the door dinged and closed between them.

* * *

**Ohhh, I couldn't believe you made it... lolz**

**Tell me if you agree or believe otherwise when I said this is a boring chapter. The review button is waiting for you. :)**

**I won't promise but I'LL TRY to make it up to you guys and bring back the fic you've loved before but in case you find this boring already, I'm not blaming you. Hehehe.**

**Well, as always, thank you thank you for reading. :)  
**


	23. Chapter 23

**Here's an update, sorry if I am taking a lot of day off. Quite busy with my other fic but not to worry, I am not forgetting this. Of course. :))**

**Thank you for the reviews and alerts guys!**

**Here's the 23rd chapter, happy reading!

* * *

**

##############

**12 Months Later**

##############**  
**

The pen gently landed on the smooth surface of the paper before it started dancing and began forming curves that one could call a signature. The figure wasn't a pleasing sight if Chase, who had been standing before the glass desk for the last ten minutes, would be asked; but the sound it made as it turned for another swirl made him inwardly smile as the thought of getting a whole day sleep awaits him.

He and the rest of the Diagnostic team had been up for like 48 hours since the time Conrad handed them the chart two days ago and within that span of time, a twenty minute nap would be a blessing if chances allowed them to.

"Thank you," the Australian doc muttered as the file landed on his hands again.

"Tell Conrad I'll be flying with Wilson to Las Vegas for the stupid conference he's been nagging me about," his boss ordered just before he was about to turn to leave.

Unlike Cuddy, the new Dean of Medicine wouldn't take 'no' for an answer leaving all his subordinates dragging their asses off to whatever conference the hospital was invited to. No one will be spared if he says in the memo 'ALL DEPARTMENT HEADS' and unfortunately, being one, House counts.

Watching the intensive care specialist walked down the hall with extra springs under his feet, House couldn't help but to think of how the hospital changed for the last twelve months under a new regime. Word on the lobby confirmed how hard it was for all of them in the first quarter of last year to deal with the idea that Cuddy had given up the position they never dream she'll leave. Rules and regulations were left untouched yet Conrad wasn't that friendly looking especially to his subordinates. He tried to reach out and jam with them during hospital fundraising events but his employee-employer relationship stayed the same.

He was still feared and mysterious in the eyes of many but not for House. Knowing the new dean's weakness, the diagnostician took it as his golden ticket to overpower Conrad in most of his procedures that required his boss's signature. Both of them played the game that had already been won many times by the head of the Diagnostic Medicine.

"Ready for your flight?" a voice caught House's attention.

When he lifted his gaze, he saw Conrad standing in the middle of his office, holding out the file he had given earlier to Chase.

"Sure," the diagnostician answered as the visitor slumped himself on the chair across him.

"Aussie and I happened to cross each other in the elevator. I signed it there so, here you go," the dean said as he handed forward the file.

"Wilson told me he's flying with you," Conrad said after a few seconds of silence between them.

"It's his last minute change of plans. He first said he won't be coming," House briefly said.

"You don't seem to be happy with the idea."

"How can I bring a woman in my hotel room if I have Wilson in there?" A grin and a chuckle was seen and heard from the dean.

"Ohgod House, you never change."

"And you're being a hypocrite. Don't tell me you won't be thinking of doing the same thing. It's Vegas man, what do you expect?"

"I expect you to attend the two day medical conference, not have monkey sex with a bunch of women."

"Uh-huh," House nodded in agreement, "but medical conferences happen in broad daylight not during those cold lonely nights; by the way, did you just said you EXPECT me to attend those boring talks?"

Conrad nodded that made the diagnostician left out a 'tsk' sound.

"God, I'm frustrated," House said in his fake hurt tone, "by now, you should have known me."

"Come on, it's just two days," the dean urged, "I don't care how sleep and drool inducing the speakers are, just be there. By the third day, I promise to send you bucks and let you stay there for another two."

That's when the diagnostician's face glowed but was instantly washed off when a realization hits him.

"What about Wilson?" he asked.

"I'll make some calls to get him another room," Conrad assured.

House dramatically sighed as his eyes firmly landed on the dean's green ones. "Ohgod, I think I'm falling in love," he said with hand clutching his chest.

The dean rolled his eyes before standing up. "Anything for you, House. Just attend the damn conference," and with that Conrad walked out the door.

* * *

By eight o'clock, House finally made it in the airport's departure area where his eyes began to scan the crowd for the familiar face he needed to see and get close with before boarding his flight. It took him a few more walks before his eyes finally got the sight of James Wilson.

"Hey, I've got to go... Bye," the oncologist instantly said to the person he's talking with on the phone as his hazel browns saw the diagnostician making his way towards him.

"Where the hell have you been?" House annoyingly asked as soon as he landed right in front of his friend who was keeping his phone in his phone pocket.

"I should be the one asking you that question, where the hell have you been? You're late, for half an hour," Wilson stated, "Good thing our flight isn't up until another half."

"I still have to drop off my used sheets and blankets at the laundry," the diagnostician explained before his eyes dropped on two large suitcases that were standing beside his friend's.

"Where do you think you're going? Bahamas?" House said, "It looks like you packed your whole cabinet there."

"I, unlike you, is conscious on what I look like. I don't repeat clothes and I do change at night," the oncologist reminded him, eyes dropping on his luggage as well.

"You made it sound like I'm not doing those."

"Are you?" Wilson asked curiously.

As House rolled his eyes at him, the airport's P.A. sounded around the place.

"USAirways Flight ET-7564 will be leaving in less than twenty minutes. Passengers are requested to start boarding the plane. Thank you," a sweet female voice informed the crowd.

"Well, that's us," the oncologist said, picking up his luggage with both hands.

"By the way, just to warn, your ticket isn't wrong. You're really down to Cabin C while I'm stick up at Cabin A," House proudly said as they began to walk towards the departure gate.

In return, Wilson didn't bother to say anything. Complaining was the last thing in his mind when the usherette took hold of his ticket and politely ordered him to make his way to the back of the plane, Cabin C for short.

* * *

Less then 10 hours later, House found himself slouching on one of the benches at McCarran International Airport in Las Vegas as Wilson stood a few steps away from him, talking with someone on his cell.

"No, we don't need another reservation, we just wanted to know where our bus is," the oncologist cleared.

Sighing with disappointment, House, with a scowl on his face, eased himself up and moved right next to his friend. "Give me the phone; let me talk to them," he said gesturing his hand open while moving his fingers back and forth.

"Okay, we'll be here but please, make it fast," Wilson said as soon as the person on the other line stopped talking. "Thank you," he added a few seconds later.

"So where's our bus?" House asked as his friend kept his cell phone back in his pocket.

"It'll be here in less than an hour," the oncologist informed.

The diagnostician's eyes grew because of the revelation.

"In one hour? My leg is hurting. I can't sit on those steel benches any longer and I can't stay standing up either," he complained.

"I can't do anything if the bus is still caught up with the Vegas traffic. Just help yourself, buy some coffee or grab a book to read," Wilson said before walking away from his friend to sit on one of the benches.

As told, House limped towards the coffee cart store and ordered a cup of hot cappuccino to which the woman behind it instantly made.

"Here you go sir," she said before taking the $ 2 payment of the man.

The diagnostician was gulping the first swig of his drink when his eyes caught...

"Lisa..." he whispered enough for him self to hear but for others not to.

He lowered his cup to as his mind battle to confirm if the sight of the long haired brunette with a slim built and perfect ass was indeed the woman who left his life twelve months ago. His heart was beginning to hammer his chest stronger as every skin in his entire body suddenly felt cold.

When the woman he was eyeing on turned to someone behind her, probably a friend, and when she flashed out a smile, he got his confirmation.

"Let's go," House firmly ordered while towering beside his friend, eyes still glued on Cuddy who was lining up for departure.

"What? House, we can't go; our bus..." Wilson tried to say.

"Either you stay here and wait for the bus or I'll leave without you 'cause I'll be calling a cab now," the diagnostician said, without the promise to apologize later.

"What the hell is going on?" the oncologist asked.

The six feet man hold their gazes for a while before lifting his stares on Cuddy again who was still lined up, waiting for her ticket to be primary checked. Wilson turned his head and followed his friend's stares.

"Ohgod," was all he could mutter as he eased himself up.

"So, ready to get a cab with me?" House asked.

"No," Wilson instantly answered before moving his body forward that only meant one thing.

"Where the hell are you doing?" the diagnostician asked, "Let her go."

His friend looked at him in disbelief. "Are you listening to what you're saying?" the oncologist asked.

"I don't... want to see her. I don't want to talk to her," House firmly confessed.

"What?" Wilson asked, still in disbelief, before turning to look at Cuddy again.

Both men stared at the woman for awhile before their attention was snatched by a man who, when they turned their heads to his direction, was already standing beside them.

"Excuse me sirs, are you Mr. Wilson and Mr. House?" the man politely asked.

"Y-yes, I'm Mr. James Wilson and this is Mr. Greg House and you are?" the oncologist introduced.

"I'm Keith Finland, I'll be escorting you to our hotel sir."

"Oh, well, let's... get going," Wilson said before turning to his friend only to see him still looking at Cuddy.

"You ready to go now or are you planning to talk to her?" he asked.

House sighed and said, "What for? Look at where she's going."

With that, the oncologist lifted his gaze on the monitor screen above the departure gate that shows where Cuddy's plane was heading.

As his friend started walking with the hotel's bus butler, Wilson inwardly read the monitor:

_From: Malibu, California_

_Laid Off: Las Vegas, Nevada_

_To: Princeton, New Jersey

* * *

_**It's all coming back... lolz**

**I would love to hear what you think about this chapter! :D**

**Thanks for reading! =)  
**


	24. Chapter 24

**First, thank you for the reviews last time and thank you for patiently waiting for this new chapter. As usual, blame it on school time and school works.**

**Second: Just to warn you, I was out of the planet when I wrote this so this chap might not be that good. This is also UN-BETA and was just primary checked.**

**Third: Happy Reading! :D

* * *

**"There you are," Wilson said as he took the bar stool next to House's at the hotel's bar.

Four hours earlier, they left the airport in peace via the hotel's vehicle service. Neither one of them spoke about Cuddy's unexpected appearance though both of them had been bugged by the question as to what brought the former dean heading back to Plainsboro.

"What'd you find out?" the diagnostician asked, nodding towards his friend's direction before taking a quick swig from his scotch.

"Aside from Conrad being surprise of Cuddy's sudden arrival as well? I've got nothing to spill," he heard his friend replied.

"Interesting," House said, dropping his stares on his glass, "so she's going back to Plainsboro to..."

"You think she's coming back for you?"

"No, you idiot," the six feet man instantly answered, their eyes meeting again.

"I was actually going to 'it's-interesting-that-she's-coming-back-to-Plainsboro-out-of-the-blue' logic," he cleared as soon as his eyes landed back on his glass again.

"This isn't out of the blue House," Wilson justified, "She lives in Jersey most of her life. There's no mystery, maybe she just figured that it's the right time to go back to where she belongs."

For a moment, the diagnostician kept silent as he inwardly agreed to what his friend had stated. There were a lot of questions running in his head and he wanted them to be answered by anyone not just by Cuddy. The pain she inflicted in his heart was still there to the point that he doesn't even know if he's ready to face her again.

"What are you planning?" the oncologist asked.

"Planning about what?"

"About Cuddy. Are you planning to meet her? When? How? Are you ready to say something after twelve months of not talking to her?" Wilson threw.

House rolled his eyes in return and just when he was about to answer in his usual deflective way, a brunette came up beside him, grabbing both his and his friend's attention.

"Hi, Brent told me you're Greg," she seductively informed, tracing the diagnostician's shoulder with her fingertip.

"Who's Brent?" Wilson eyes landed back on House as his brows met in curiosity.

"The guy over there," the lady answered, pointing to a black guy at the counter.

_Bar. A young brunette. Ohgod_, Wilson thought as his eyes grew wide at his realization.

"Well, we have to go, Jimmy," House said, lifting himself off the bar stool with the brunette smiling beside him.

"I'm paying her by hour so..." he whispered as soon as he reached his friend's side.

"House, you can't be doing this," the oncologist tried to hold him back.

"More like doing her," the six feet man snarked, gaining an eye roll in return.

"Conference is at eight tomorrow and..."

"I know. That's why I want you stop nagging me so me and this lovely lady here could get started," House interjected and with that, he and the brunette left Wilson who couldn't help but to shake his head as his eyes watched from a distance as his friend wrapped an arm behind the lady's back.

* * *

In the mist of the sound of lips meeting lips, House pulled his face away from the brunette he now knew named Katie. As a reflex, the lady tried to claim his lips again only to realize the diagnostician had moved his head sideway.

"What's wrong?" Katie asked while tracing circles on his bare chest.

"Shouldn't you be leaving by now?" he returned.

A soft laugh from the woman resting on his side answered him.

"Are you serious?" she asked and added the moment his blue eyes landed on her greens, "you're kicking me out? After two rounds?"

"I'm not selfish. Who knows how many blokes are already waiting for you in the lobby," he said, wanting nothing but to be alone at the moment.

"Let them wait," she softly said before dropping her lips on the crook of his neck before dragging wet kisses to some places within her reach. "And I certainly don't mind being here with you," she added, sliding her hand south to his love muscle only to be halt in midway.

"Stop," he reluctantly said, his hand still holding her wrist.

"Don't tell me you don't want it," Katie dared.

"I don't want it," House said.

"What?" the brunette eased on a sitting position that sent the covers sliding down, exposing her set of healthy funbags before the man. "You mean, you don't want these?" she asked in disbelief, cupping her breast with both hands.

The diagnostician sighed as he looked at the breasts presented only for him. Since when did female breasts became unattractive for him? He didn't felt arouse, not even turn on. He wasn't pleased with the sight.

He shook his head once and said, "No," before pushing himself up off the bed and putting on his boxers.

"Ugh, you can't be like this after what we had?" Katie tried to push her luck, obviously wanting to have a third round.

"If I can't, I won't be out of the bed now," the diagnostician said without bothering to look back as his feet lead him to the bathroom.

* * *

As soon as the lights illuminated the bathroom, House slowly limped towards the counter where he was met by his own pair of blue eyes. His hair was a mess and his body still painted with sweat from the performance he had with Katie. He couldn't complain; certainly, there's a reason why this 25 year old calls herself an expert hooker at a very young age. She was forthright when she said he was great too, her three orgasms were proof of that, but here he was, wanting to be alone as his eyes traced the emptiness his blue eyes were trying to hide.

With his face fresh from the water he repeatedly splash on, he looked up at his reflection with the hope that the thing bugging in his mind had finally have gotten away. His hands were turning white as he balled them to a fist, a way of showing how badly he wanted to be freed from the thoughts that caged him since the minute his eyes were set on Lisa Cuddy at the airport.

They aren't together but he sure feels like a cheater. He won't say it to anyone but he knew that guilt had been running up and down his system the second he and Katie entered his suite. He did felt wonderful during and ten minutes after what they've shared but right now he wished he never did if feeling like crap was the payback.

"Are you okay?" a voice interrupted him from his thoughts and when he turned to see the unwanted intruder, he learned it was Katie warmly cocooned with the sheet.

Again, the view didn't arouse him, instead he was left to hold himself together before his stomach turned upside down and sent him vomiting over the toilet. He wanted to run, go somewhere not just inside the four walls of the bathroom and not even of the suite, but in spite of being a known jerk, he was man enough to know that that's not how things supposed to work.

With his mind occupied with list of what-to-do's, he failed to notice that Katie had already landed her left palm on his jaw and it was the warmth of her thumb tracing his cheekbone that sent his blue eyes landing on her face.

"You still have two hours left," she seductively informed, letting the rest of her lower regions close the remaining distance between them.

"Which I think I have the choice to use or not," House returned.

"It'll be stupid if you choose the latter, wouldn't it?" the hooker answered, leaning down on him just before he looked sideaway and hold her firm on her shoulder, sending her tiptoed feet flat on the floor again.

"Listen," he said after a few seconds of silence.

"I..." he began only to be cut off when her soft lips landed on his.

"I don't know why you're such a baby right now," she purred between her soft kisses and licks, "You weren't like this earlier and I will make you remember that."

The silence of the bathroom was suddenly filled with House's gasp and groan when her small hand met his balls that were still securely inside his boxers.

"Still want me to leave?" she asked with a knowing smirk as her hand finally made it inside where it began stroking his deflated cock.

He needed not to say anything because the way his hand gripped her wrist to a halt gave her the answer.

"What?" Katie asked in disbelief, "is there a wife or girlfriend coming over?" she added as soon as their faces were far enough.

For a minute, he stood there motionless as their eyes glued to each other. He was searching for a spark and a sudden kick of happiness but like what he expected there was none.

There was however a new shade in her eyes. For him, the green pearls her eyelids safely enclosed were now grey slates. His heart raced when he realized who's eyes were those. When Katie slowly blinked her eyes, he saw someone else's eyelashes batting at him. He wanted his brain to stop the slideshow of memories but it just wouldn't until...

"Greg..." Katie called out, wanting to know who'll come over that made him so adamant with his decision that she must leave.

The girl was paid before they even got in the room but he knew she won't leave him just yet. She wanted another round and her libido made her care less of what or who might come; so letting out a gush of air, House was left but to look away before limping back to the bedroom where he began putting on more clothes before walking out the suite.

* * *

An hour and a half later, Wilson crossed his suite's living room with a scowl on his face for being disturbed in his nap. He didn't felt the need to take a peek at the peep hole knowing who it was since he didn't call for room service and certainly didn't beep for another kind of "room service."

"What do you want?" he asked as soon as the door was wide open.

His sleepy eyes and slightly blurred vision caught the sight of House standing on the lobby, looking unhappy.

"Need to talk," the diagnostician announced, breezing pass his best friend as he made his way in the room.

"Can't this wait 'til..."

"NO!" House instantly answered causing Wilson to flinch and close the door.

The oncologist looked at him, puzzled on what happened that made him so cranky and needy.

For a minute, the room fell silent as House slumped himself on the couch while Wilson went to his mini fridge to get his friend a beer which he though the man might want.

"Here," he said, handing out the can, as soon as he re-appeared in the living room.

"Already had some," the physician rejected the offer.

He really did have some when he urge himself to get drunk at a nearby bar, hoping the image of Cuddy will leave him at least for the night.

Obviously, his plan of get-drunk-and-forget didn't work. Her eyes, her smile, her face, her body and everything about her was still damnly stuck in every corner of his brain.

The guilt was still there too and that was the same guilt that sent him emptying almost half a case of beer.

"Okay," he heard his friend say before hearing the bar stool stir towards his direction, a sound that could only mean that the oncologist had taken his seat.

"What's going on?" Wilson asked a few moments later.

"I feel like crap," House softly admitted while tapping his cane on the floor in slow rhythm.

"After having sex?" his friend asked in disbelief while watching him placed his forehead on the hook of his cane. "Wow," the man added when he didn't return any answer, "This is new."

"This is new and THIS is bad," the diagnostician added, leaning down on the backrest of the couch.

"What, you think you got an STD or something?"

"No you idiot!" House said, shooting daggers as soon as their eyes met for the second time that night.

"You said you feel like crap and you do look like crap, after having sex with some random stranger, of course I'll..." Wilson explained only to be cut off by his friend.

"I want to go home," the six feet man admitted, unable to meet the other man's hazel browns, that instantly caused the oncologist's mind to go blank.

"I want to see her," House declared before moving his stares back on his friend after a few minutes of dead silence between them.

Sighing with secret joy was all Wilson could do. No need to ask, he knew who his best friend meant.

Jumping from the bar stool he was seated on, he tried his best to hide the knowing smirk wanting to be plastered on his face.

"I'll make some calls to the airport," he said as soon as his hand met House's shoulder and through a nod, the diagnostician said thank you.

* * *

**Ta dah! :D You made it! LOL**

**I hope you liked the chapter though I'll agree if you say the scenes with Katie were kind of messy. Tell you a secret and it's the reason why: "Because it's hard to write something that House won't do!"**

**He's not a cheater so I find it hard to write a "cheating" House.**

**Feel free to agree or disagree. I would love to hear words from you guys!**

**Thanks for reading!  
**


	25. Chapter 25

**Two months. Yah, that's how long I stayed AWOL as far as fanfic writing's concerned. Oh well, here I am, making up to you. **

**This isn't actually my best shot but nonetheless, I hope you'll enjoy this chapter. Take note, this chapter is UN-BETA and was just primary checked. I would take full credit for any errors b'c of that.**

**Well, I don't want to hold you for too long, Happy Reading!

* * *

**It was only a few days ago that he left Plainsboro but for House something was different with the city as he and Wilson silently drove down the streets to the hospital. No, there weren't new buildings, no playground or park that suddenly sprouted from the ground and the sky he was looking up to was still blue, there was just this something - or someone - that he fear to admit to be the cause of the hammering of his heart.

"You're going to be fine," he heard Wilson say that caused him to turn his head to the direction of his friend.

He nodded, watching as the oncologist's hands turn the steering wheel to the left while feeling the car do the same. "Of course I'll be. No reason to feel the opposite," he said.

He heard a mocking chuckle in response. "Oh right, I forgot you're the one who insisted to leave the conference before it ends to see Cuddy yet you're also the one who's seated beside me right now, feeling as if the world will be coming to an end once I pulled the car five buildings from now; and yes, I know that even though you're not saying anything. Your eyes are tellers than I imagine they are."

"Quit being girly," House said, putting a scowl on his face as he looked out the window again.

"I'm not having cold feet on this," he silently added, "I just don't know if she's ready to see me again."

"Conrad said Cuddy's at the hospital. Now why would she be there if she doesn't want to run into you? As far as she knows you're there and not in some conference in Vegas," Wilson pointed out, "Relax, both of you will be just fine."

"Yah," House agreed though his mind was already filled with scenarios if things turn out differently.

* * *

Meanwhile in the hospital, the manly scent of Conrad's perfume had been invading Cuddy's nostrils for the last two hours as she was comfortably seated on the couch in the Dean of Medicine's office.

The last time she was here, this was hers. Nothing changed apart from the new sets of golf statuettes that were placed on top of drawers and in the shelves while mugs telling the world how great Conrad is as a dad were also claiming their throne in one side. Indeed, traces of femininity in this room were wiped out… but Lisa Cuddy knows it won't be for too long.

"I really appreciate your substitution, Carl," she sincerely said as her lovely grey eyes landed on the middle man's face.

"It is my pleasure to handle the hospital for you," the man said, nodding in courtesy as he does. "I know there'll be things that might surprise you as you re-handle this place but… some changes have to be done."

"Changes?" the woman asked, her mind, for some reason, automatically jumping on House's department. She knew how the diagnostician could set people off and Conrad, being an inexperience fellow as far as the six feet man is concerned, might have shrug off the diagnostic department as punishment.

"Yah, I ordered re-painting on ORs, delivery rooms and in the morgue. New linens had also been delivered two months ago and are now in use in NICU."

"I really like those changes," she commented while mentally kicking herself for forgetting the fact that Conrad told her that House's department wasn't affected by any departmental cancellations or mergings.

"Oh I hope you will but I'd rather wait until you see the rooms before sighing a relief," the male doctor said knowing how high the woman's standards are in terms of hospital services.

"Oh can I?"

"Give me five minutes and we'll be on our way," Conrad said.

"Thank you," Cuddy returned with a smile and a nod before watching the man eased himself up from the chair.

* * *

One hour later, Nursery's main door was pulled open and out came Conrad and Cuddy, both of them wearing smiles on their faces.

"I like the blue wall on the boys' ward and pink in the girls'," the woman commented as they started to walk the hallway.

"I thought you'll find it very ordinary," the male doc said.

"It is but they're lighter than usual so, both colors are very inviting. Whose idea was it to have sky blue and carnation pink anyway?"

"Oh it's my daughter," Conrad proudly said, "she came with me one morning and said light green and yellow are also usual nursery colors."

"Your… _daughter_?" Cuddy asked, expectedly feeling her heart sank just as the word 'daughter' escaped the tip of her tongue.

"Ohgod, I'm sorry…" the man immediately apologized upon hearing the sudden change in the woman's tone as both of them halt their steps, "I didn't mean to…"

"It's okay…" she lied.

"How old is she?" she heard herself say after a gulp, of air… of courage to pull herself together again.

"She just turned eight last month. Quite smart for a kid her age," the psychologist shared, again, proudly.

"I know the feeling," Cuddy silently muttered not knowing that the voice she let out she thought was enough for her to hear alone was able to reach Conrad's ears. The man's hand landed on her back before it went up and down to soothe her from her unspoken pain.

"It's been a year," she heard him say, his voice dropping to a personal level.

"Yah," was all she could say in return as the need to move was calling her, "but the pain is still there."

"Guess that will never leave… but hey, you're doing great," Conrad cheered.

"Thanks," Cuddy replied as she looked up to the man's hazel browns before letting her feet lead her to the elevator.

"You know if you want to take a leave off before getting back to work, you could," the man said, following close after the woman.

With a smile, Cuddy faced him just as her index finger hit the 'down' button.

"I had enough rest for a year Carl… I'll stick with my plan. I'll come back to work this afternoon."

* * *

It was past lunch when House finally entered his outer office where two of his team were waiting for him. For the last three hours, he decided to lock himself inside Wilson's office in spite the urge of his best friend to go out and do his job. For him, it was better to flip through the pages of Oncology Today than to risk meeting his former lover down the hall whom he knew was on the way out after her rumored visit.

"Danna's HcG rose up to five percent," Taub announced as soon as House's left feet landed the carpeted office.

"This is why you page me? To diagnose pregnancy?" the diagnostician annoyingly complained.

"She's not…"

"How come women are suddenly ashame of carrying the new generation of the world?" House asked, limping to the mini kitchen counter where he took a can of soda to drink. "Did you show her the result while her husband is in the room?"

"What? Why?" 'Tiny' asked.

"Well, it's either she knows she's not really pregnant OR the baby's not hubby's," the six feet man theorized.

"Or she knows pregnancy is not really the diagnosis," Foreman, who was standing behind Taub, said.

With a headshake and a muffled chuckle, House commented the neurologist's words.

"Come on, you know as well as I do, rise on HcG level could also mean a tumor. We just don't know where it is because we don't have an MRI scan because she's been refusing any test since she got in here," the man reminded his boss.

"Well, what are you waiting for? Go and force her to get that damn pregnancy test so that if that comes back negative, you could get her in the MRI and get me a scan," House ordered before taking a swig on his soda.

"I guess you missed out the part when Foreman said 'She's been refusing any test'," Taub reminded.

"We need someone who could talk her to it," the black guy said.

"Oh for god sake, get the husband to do it, if she still doesn't want it, have him consent the scan," their boss snarked before limping towards his inner office.

"House," Foreman called out, stopping his boss on his tracks and was successful on getting his attention.

"We need more than a husband for this. I'm afraid we need Conrad this time," the neurologist added.

With a grunt and a disapproving look, House walked out the outer office and made his way to the elevator.

Back in the room, Taub looked at the much larger guy with him and said, "You think it's a good idea?"

"That we used the Dean of Medicine to force a woman to do some tests?" Foreman asked, "We do it all the time."

"Guess I should have told him that it's not Conrad House will be meeting downstairs, Cuddy took over the office again twenty minutes ago."

* * *

With a scowl on his face, House limped in the Clinic. God, he hates his current patient, very demanding. As his eyes stayed glue on the double doors of the Dean of Medicine's office, he even thought of tricking his patient just to get her to do a test. If it didn't work, then he'll do what he knows he's best at, he'll browbeat them until she and her husband have no choice but to agree on him.

"Dr. Ha…" he knew he heard his name as it escaped the lips of the dean's assistant. New or not, he didn't care. He didn't bother to mock back, he didn't even bother to take a quick glance to the creature he knew was about to stop him on his tracks.

He wanted his test and he will get it by using… Cuddy?

His was stopped on his tracks. For a minute he thought he was dreaming until the voice he'd been dreading to hear for last twelve months finally landed his hearing.

"Dr. House it would be better if you knocked," Cuddy said in her best administrative tone after taking a quick look at the sudden intruder before diving her eyes on her paperwork again.

He heard her but unlike her words which were loud and clear, his world seemed to moved in slow motion.

In his ocean blues, nothing else exists other than the woman owning those soft curls, those familiar left hand gripping a pen and those lovely grey eyes that makes every man gibberish… and is obviously the same pair that were now staring back at him.

* * *

**First, thank you that you consider reading this chapter to the end. =) **

**I don't know when will be the next update and for that I hope you'll patiently wait.**

**I really wanted to know what you think of this chapter, reviews are well loved so drop some. **

**As always, thank you for reading!  
**


	26. Chapter 26

**Thank you for the reviews and for the time you gave to read the last chapter! =) Well, now it's time for an update...**

**Happy Reading!

* * *

**"Yes?" Cuddy asked after seconds turned to minutes between her and her former lover.

"Is there anything..." she began to say only to choke with her words when House began to move towards her desk, "I... I could do for you?"

"I need you to talk to my patient," the diagnostician answered in uneven tone as his ocean blues continue to trace even the smallest details of her face.

"She's refusing all standard testing. I couldn't do anything without any of the result from..." he added as his feet finally come to a halt beside one of the client chairs.

"Fine," Cuddy said, too quickly, while easing herself from the chair she was seated on. Her grey eyes now landing on her desk, refusing to let herself be read by House's gaze.

"What room should I get myself into?" she asked, breezing past him as she hurriedly crossed the room towards the coat stand.

"Three four eight," he replied, watching her nod in understanding.

She was ready to leave. She thought she could handle seeing him again, acting like nothing happened between them in the past but the rapid heart beat hammering her chest says so much how unready she was to face House again and leaving her office was the only thing she knew could temporarily calm her down; but just before her hand turned the knob she was holding, the tone she feared to hear from him entered her hearing.

"Cuddy..." he softly called out.

She cursed in her thoughts and gulped quite hard outside. For some, leaving their former lover in situation like this is the best way to call it a day but for Cuddy, turning around and landing her eyes on his ocean blues was a better idea.

"I..." House began.

"House... I can't..." she paused and sighed. "I can't deal with anything that's running in your mind right now," she confessed.

"Okay. Maybe later," he was forced to say.

She forced a nod, "Later."

"Is now later?" he asked that caused her to let out a frustrated sigh before finally turning the knob and completely letting herself out the room.

* * *

Three hours later, Wilson shot his head up upon hearing his office door cracked open. The lines on his friend's forehead plus the gloom the man's ocean blues possessed gathered questions on the tip of his tongue but just before his voice could deliver them, the diagnostician's gruff voice owned the air.

"I can't handle this."

"What happened?" Wilson asked, eyeing his friend as the man took one of the chairs across him.

"She shut me down," House complained, "she kept shutting me down."

The oncologist sighed. "You know you can't work together if tension hangs in the air like this. Both of you..."

"Both of us what? Need to talk to each other?" House threw, annoyingly. "God knows I tried. She's the one who's pushing me away."

"What did she say? Or do?"

"Nothing."

"Nothing?" Wilson's brows met as the question escaped his lips and as confusion clouded his brain.

"Does 'nothing' have a new meaning I don't know of?" the diagnostician asked. "She's doing nothing that's the problem," he added a few seconds later.

"You can't force her into doing something she isn't ready. Give her the space she needed... she wanted," the oncologist advised.

Silence might have hung between them but not in House's head. He knows Wilson's right; but although he believes that she needed the space she requested, he doubt it's the similar case as far as her 'want' is concern. She had her time, her needed time, in fact she had all the time for the last twelve months, why the hell does she still want some more?

"It's unfair," he muttered only to realize that the words he wanted only for himself to hear also landed his friend's.

"It's always is, House," Wilson commented, oblivious to the ideas running in the diagnostician's head.

* * *

_**Thirty Minutes Earlier**_

"_Mrs. Klein, we know you're worried about the cost of these tests Dr. House's team had been recommending you to take but just so you know, the results that will be gathered will help them cure you," Cuddy calmly explained to a woman who was properly seated on a hospital bed and was hooked with an IV tube and fluid._

"_No, I know there are other ways other than taking out an inch of my body or a drop of my blood," the woman stubbornly said._

"_Yah like how? Tossing a coin might help, what do you think?" House threw from the side after rolling his eyes and facing the crowd of three._

_With a glare, Cuddy was successful in shutting him up as the patient's husband, Robin, held his wife's hand._

"_Mr. Klein," the dean professionally addressed as her eyes landed on the couple again, "I know right now decisions are hard to make but to save you from making harder decision as far as your wife's health is concern I suggest you come up with a final decision now."_

"_You think they'll buy your argument with that scare?" House asked, popping his head up from his quick bow, "They've been hearing that line for the last three hours from you... and for the last two days from my team."_

"_Shut. Up," Cuddy mouthed at him._

"_I'm so sorry. It's just that... my wife and I are scared," Mr. Klein confessed, watching the dean's soft grey slates land on his face again. "She never had been sick before..."_

"_That's because your wife had never been pregnant before," House butt in causing Cuddy's head to turn to his direction._

"_What?" the husband asked, feeling his wife's hand squeezing his. "She... She can't be..."_

"_Oh yes she could... not just with you," he added as the sound of his small gallant steps filled the air in the room._

"_House!" she heard his boss slash former lover cut in._

"_I'm so sorry, Mr. Klein for -" she said, growing worried as the husband's ears showed the growing anger behind the calm façade_

"_Why are you sorry? Were you the one who knocked his wife up?" House asked, his blue eyes landing on her slates._

"_Cut this crap or I'll fire you," the woman warned as the wife before them tried to soothe her husband._

"_You're going to fire me for tell-"_

"_Yes!" she firmly said, wanting it to be a treat not a fact._

_A minute of silence had passed between all of them; and as the patient looked on her blanket and as her husband looked dumbfounded with eyes on the floor, there was House and Cuddy exchanging knowing glances, seemingly erasing the world around them, until a voice before them brought them back._

"_I'm not pregnant," Mrs. Klein said, getting all their attention._

"_Sorry, you're not the one who should make that call, the pregnancy test will," House countered._

"_I told you, my wife can't be pregnant," the husband firmly stated._

"_I assume you two had sex," the diagnostician asked._

"_Yah," Mr. Klein awkwardly admitted, "but not since I went to Hawaii for a business trip."_

"_Which was?"_

"_Ten months ago. I stayed there all year long. I just got back last Thursday after I got the call that told me Danna's here," the husband informed while watching both doctors sighed. "What? You know what it is?"_

"_Actually, there's a slight chance Dr. House is right," Cuddy said._

"_What? Danna..." the man called out, dropping his eyes on his wife._

"_Judging by the blood drain in your wife's face, I say I don't have a slight chance that I'm right, I say I, once again, am right," House proudly stated._

"_Is it true?" Robin asked, "Danna, tell me, is it?"_

_With a gulp, Cuddy watched the wife let out the first batch of sob as his husband's name and the word 'I'm sorry' escaped her lips._

"_My team will be coming down and will take some blood sample and will do an ultrasound to see how far along are you," House said in much softer tone as he scribbled orders in the patient's chart._

"_I thought... I thought we'll have a baby... together Danna, together," the husband sobbed as his feet dragged him away from his wife in disgust._

"_Robin... I'm so sorry that the fairy tale didn't work this time," the patient said reminding him of the theme they had in their wedding day._

_Hearing the woman's words, House eyes shot from the patient to Cuddy before letting out a sigh._

"_It never does," he said before limping towards the door._

"_You did great," Cuddy professionally and softly praised as both of them were stuck in the elevator on their way down._

_Of course they don't like the idea of being together in a small space like this but the other elevator was just on its way up, so since both of them wanted to go down as soon as they could, they have to suck up what's in store for them._

_He nodded, acknowledging her words without bothering to unglue his eyes on the digits that were constantly changing above them._

"_If her preg test comes back positive, she's good to go. I don't think it's the same case with her husband though," he added._

"_Yah... but he has to deal with it. It'll be rude to just leave his wife with a baby," Cuddy said, also fascinated with the digits._

"_I think he will," House said. "Their fairy tale didn't work," he paused and turned to look at her, earning her stares in return before adding, "Ours also didn't."_

_As if on cue, the elevator dinged. Both of them looked up and realized the lift had reached the ground floor; and just when House thought Cuddy will step out, he heard her say, "It never does."_

_With that, she walked out and made her way to her office... leaving him and the elevator coming up again to his and Wilson's departmental floor.

* * *

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**Thank you for reading! =)  
**


	27. Chapter 27

**Merry Christmas huns! *hugs* Yup, as my Christmas gift... here's an update!**

**Yah, after 48 years. lolz Anyway, I wanted to thank you for the reviews, alerts, favorites and for urging me to continue writing this =)**

**I'm sad to say though that this is un-Beta-ed and slightly rushly done so forgive me if there's no stable chapter plotlines.**

**Well, I don't wanna hold you longer, happy reading!

* * *

**Two Weeks Later

As soon as the main door met its doorframe, Wilson began making his way to the room at the end of the hallway. As step after step takes him closer to it, a sense of déjà vu engulfed him though his mind warned him that excitement will surely not be with him this time. It's been a year since he entered that space and it saddened him to remember that the last time he did, he was mourning as his eyes landed on the toys that will no longer be played.

If only he had the guts to say 'No, I can't go there,' he would have. He knows he wasn't ready. None of them really is, not even House who claimed he already moved on. But he can't just say that to a woman who he knows have the greatest mournful days than any of them; and it was the same woman who caused him to stop on his tracks as soon as he entered the room's doorway.

"What's going on?" he asked as he slowly walked further in the room, earning Cuddy's attention.

"Hi," the dean welcomed him with a smile as she looked up at him though her hands were busy taping a box's cover.

The room was nearly empty and instead of seeing stuff animals, blocks, Barbie dolls and dollhouses, all that greeted his hazel browns were large boxes that were either piled by two-s or three-s, each of them bearing a label the oncologist was sure he had read on a sign when his department went to an outreach program for orphaned youth.

"Wait... why are you getting rid of Rachel's toys?" he asked, still in the state of disbelief that Cuddy will and can do such thing.

"I'm not getting rid of them... I'm donating them," she replied as her eyes drop once again on the box she was trying to close.

"I think those two are just the same in some cases. Donating just sounds... charitable," Wilson said, peeking in an open box beside him.

"Well, no harm done since I love playing the charitable card every once in a while," she shared after a beat before lifting the box which her friend just took from her to spare her from the heavy load it might have.

"With Rachel's toys?" the oncologist asked in disbelief.

"No one's going to play with them anyway, why still keep it?" she threw back before dropping herself to the next box to close. "And besides," she added, "there are lots of kids in the orphanage who doesn't have toys. Might as well give them what I no longer need."

"Fair enough," Wilson replied, nodding his head as his eyes stayed glued on Cuddy who was busy adding another layer of tape on the box.

Hearing his friend's explanation, he was pleased with her decision although questions of doubts began popping out in his head. From _'when?'_ to _'are you sure?' _and from _'why-s' _to _'are you still the Cuddy I knew?'_, all of them settled in his brain that if weren't for the sight of a "moving-on-Cuddy" he would have blurt them like bullets that might break the dean down.

"Well," he began after a minute of silence, trying to forget the questions he's actually dying to ask, "I assume you're still keeping some of her stuffs behind."

"I guess so," Cuddy replied as the man peeked in an open box.

"_I guess so?_" the oncologist returned as he looked at her again. "Sounds like you're not planning to leave a single toy behind."

His friend left out a sigh as she turned to stare back at him, "Oh I'm planning to leave some stuff," she declared, "I just don't know which are the ones I'll be keeping."

"Well, how about keeping... this one!" Wilson exclaimed in fake joy as he held out a stuff bunny in the air after diving his hand in the open box behind him.

Hearing his words, Cuddy faced him again, flashing him a smile that only faded as soon as her eyes landed on the stuff animal the oncologist was holding. "What?" she heard him asked a beat after she averted her eyes on somewhere else.

"House gave Rachel that bunny. I... actually don't know if I should be giving it out or not," she replied, landing her grey slates on him.

"Oh... well, let's just pick something else," he said, dropping the bunny back to the box, wanting nothing but to lighten the mood again.

"Do you think I should keep it?" Cuddy asked, earning his blank stares.

"Do you want to keep it?" he softly asked.

"I told you, I don't know... Whenever I look at that bunny I remember both of them... It's just..."

"Look," Wilson called out as he walked over towards his friend, "if you're finding it hard to keep the bunny then let it go. I'm sure House will understand."

"Isn't it so stupid of me that I'll be keeping something she didn't even care to play with but I'll be throwing out something she couldn't even let go?" Cuddy asked while slightly shaking her head.

"Rache will understand," her friend comforted. "And if you aren't going to the orphanage anytime soon, you can still think about your decision." She nodded her agreement before tending to a new box to close.

"So this... outreach program will be when?" Wilson asked a beat later.

"I'm thinking of picking next week's Friday," she replied, her voice quite strained as she pulled the closed box to the side.

"Sounds good. It's the end of the week so I don't think it'll mess up with your schedule."

"I already cleared that day since I got back," she informed as she turned to face him again this time, with a knowing smile playing on her lips.

"So you really planned this outreach program even before your plane landed on Jersey?" he asked.

Cuddy nodded. "'Cause I just want to do something nice on the day Rachel died," she finished, before turning to a new box to close.

At hearing this, Wilson instantly gulped his shame. How could he not remember that on Friday, it's been a year since Rachel died.

* * *

By day, back at the hospital, House had his eyes glued on the carpet as the discussion between him and his team continuously warmed the atmosphere in his office.

"What about Thyroid Storm?" Thirteen offered, breaking the silence the room apparently had. Her suggestion caused House to look up at her.

"It fits," House silently muttered as he slowly walked a few steps away from his team. "Push 25 milligram –"

"House, no," Taub interjected, gaining his boss and the team's attention. "We're not even sure if it's really Thyroid Storm. It could also be Sepsis or Pheochromocytoma. Her heart's failing, I don't think it can handle a wrong dose of a wrong medicine."

"She tested negative for Sepsis and she has no history of Pheochromocytoma in the family," Foreman countered.

"Well I guess it leaves the obvious," House said, walking towards the door, "Thirteen go draw blood and check her T3 and T4 hormone levels, Taub and Foreman give me a CT scan of her brain."

"And where... are you going?" Foreman asked, stopping his boss on his track.

"I will look for someone who can confirm our prospected diagnosis," their boss answered before swinging the glass door open and letting it close with a soft thud.

* * *

As his mind concluded whose figure his eyes had laid on, House slowly dismounted from his bike and let his feet fully land on the ground of St. Raphael Cemetery. He never knew his search for a specialist would land him here but he has no choice but to follow the unwanted route after the specialist's secretary told him where he should be looking.

The muddy grass he was walking on has the same softness since the last time he walked here, pulling memories in his brain that nearly convinced him to turned back and leave the place at once. But no, he kept walking though against his deepest will as step after step takes him closer to a tombstone he never wanted to look at, let alone read.

Suddenly, he stopped and sighed, watching the specialist's hair danced in rhythm with the air that swept through the place. He averted his eyes to the eastern gloomy sky as he inwardly admitted that the person he just laid his eyes on still own his heart. There never was a day she doesn't and he doubt there ever be one.

"Beautiful visitation weather," he suddenly voiced out, dropping his head and eyes on the person again just as he drop the thoughts of he and her as _them_.

"What are you doing here?" Cuddy asked as soon she turned around, eyes quite widening in shock of his presence, "And how did you know I was here?"

"I... need an endocrinologist," he said, limping towards her.

"And you really need to go here? There's a thing called cell phone, House, and I'm not the only endocrinologist in the hospital," she annoyingly informed.

"Yah but their asses are nothing compared to yours," he said in his usual Housian remark before watching her turned towards the tombstone again. Her action caused him to stop a meter and a half away from her.

Nothing was said by either of them for the following seconds. Maybe it was Cuddy's way of letting House recall his patient's symptoms or House's way of respecting Cuddy's moment but none of them exactly knows why the other wasn't talking, all they know was it was a kind of solemnity they don't want to break... yet.

"Did you run a T3 and T4 hormone panel?" she asked, back still facing the diagnostician.

"Thirteen is running the tests right now," he flatly answered and silence was her reply.

Another breeze swept through the grounds and he watched as the leaves of the trees at his far right swayed with it; and it also seemed that it was the breeze that pushed and landed him beside the dean and there, he gulped hard as soon as his eyes inevitably met the tombstone and the name it bears.

"You're coming here everyday?" he asked, eyes still glued on the thing before them.

"No," Cuddy replied, briefly looking at him after a simple head shake, "just today... and the other day."

He nodded. "Me neither," he admitted before their eyes met. "I can't... and I think I still can't," he declared as he saw questions of why-s in her grey slates.

"It's been a year," she said a beat after, watching him eyed the tombstone again.

House sadly sighed as she followed his stares. "Seems to me," he agreed before the sound of his cell phone ringing ruined the peaceful surrounding.

"What'd you find out?" he instantly asked, rejecting Thirteen's question of his whereabouts. Upon hearing the test result, he only half listened to the words his employee continued to say as his attention was suddenly stolen by Cuddy who just shivered beside him. It was only then he realized that it was a gloomy, cold and breezy supposed-to-be-summer afternoon and the clouds above them seemed to plan to pour anytime soon.

"Now start her on methamizole for her thyroid hormones and beta blockers to decrease her heart rate. And put the patient on twenty four hour observation," he ordered before snapping his phone shut and keeping it inside his pants' pocket.

"So... thyroid storm?" Cuddy asked while rubbing her forearms, her grey slates meeting his ocean blues.

"Yah," he answered with a simple nod, "her T3 and T4 are both elevated. Her CT was clean so it really just leaves... thyroid storm."

"Congratulations," she commented which he accepted with a nod before both of their eyes, as if on cue, turned towards the stone in front of them again.

Hearing her clothes being continuously softly rubbed, he fought the shyness for him to offer, "You wanna... get a coffee or something?"

In an instant, she looked up at him only to see him already looking back at her.

"It's not a date if that's what you're thinking... Think of it as two friends grabbing some coffee time together in a gloomy and cold afternoon," he said. "My treat," he added.

Hearing his shy offer, Cuddy couldn't help but to smile, a feature of hers that caused House's heart to leap in his chest and a thing that he wanted to seal with his most tender and passionate kiss.

"Your mom's trying to be cute, Rache," he softly said while briefly eyeing the stone as a cold shiver ran down his spine as he uttered the name.

"What? No," the dean countered, looking up at him while still wearing the smile on her lips.

"So..." House once again began, watching her drop her gaze on the ground, "wanna grab a cup of coffee?"

Her long eyelashes slowly batted at him just before her grey slates meet his eyes. Both orbs were searching the other for something as another silence owned them.

She sighed. "I guess I could get one."

And with that, for the first time in twelve months, House found himself smiling a genuine smile.

* * *

**Thank you for reading and I hope you liked the chapter =)**

**Words from you are highly appreciated and don't worry, of all my three fics, this is the one I will try to give a formal ending...**

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